CH 56
Title: 顶级掠食者 (Alpha Predator)
Author:水千丞 (ShuiQianCheng)
Translator: K (@kin0monogatari)
Protagonists :沈岱 (Shen Dai -MC), 瞿末予 (Qu Moyu -ML)
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Mrs. Qu took Shen Dai to a private hospital where he was introduced to an elderly doctor who seemed to be rehired after retirement.
When the doctor saw Shen Dai, Mrs. Qu was afraid that he would be embarrassed so she waited outside. But he was still embarrassed. Because of his situation, he could only hide his emotions and describe the situation to the doctor.
After listening, the doctor nodded: “You are divorced. Your ex-husband’s pheromone level is S. You want to give birth to this child and then wash off the mark.”
Shen Dai wanted to explain the cause and effect of his relationship that the doctor expressed in these few sentences, but he felt that it was unnecessary, so he just nodded.
“In this case, the best way is to get your ex-husband to cooperate and extract a little pheromone from his glands to help you get through the pregnancy. After giving birth, you can wash off the mark.”
“He doesn’t agree with me giving birth to the child, so he won’t help me.”
The doctor raised his eyebrows: “Then why did you agree to divorce? He can’t divorce you during your pregnancy. As long as you don’t divorce, as long as you want to have a baby, he must cooperate with you.”
Shen Dai lowered his eyes. The situation behind this was complicated. How can he explain to a stranger: “Doctor, is there any other way? Can I use a universal substitute pheromone or synthetic pheromone?”
“Theoretically, you can. I have been a reproductive doctor all my life, helping many omegas use alternative pheromones to assist or treat various diseases. But the pheromone of S-level alpha is too strong. It is extremely difficult to be replaced. I have never treated this problem before so in this case, the probability is too low. And it is difficult to find examples of success or failure. The foetus is still small and the need for alpha pheromone is not that obvious yet. The bigger it is, the greater the impact of alpha pheromone on it. Judging by experience, the success rate is very low.”
Shen Dai’s face was gloomy. His lips trembled slightly and he lowered his head helplessly.
The doctor looked at Shen Dai with some sympathy, “Whether this child will be born or not, you must think of whether it will be healthy or not. And also think of your safety during delivery. I can’t give you any guarantee. If your alpha can’t help you, you just drop it.”
After a long silence, Shen Dai endured the pain in his heart and asked, “Is there any other way?”
“Ah, there is almost no other way. If you are not marked, it’s fine. If you are marked, the alpha pheromone will fuse with you and the foetus in your womb deeply. So a substitute pheromone can’t be used.”
Shen Dai was so uncomfortable that he didn’t know what to do. He wanted to hide his hand in the pocket of his lab coat. But after a long time of groping, he realised that he hadn’t worn the lab coat for a long time. He has made all the preparations. He is prepared for what to give up for this child. There is no consideration of whether it is worth it or not. There is only the consciousness of willingness or not. But in the end, he can’t keep it after all. He tossed and turned in several nights, peeling off the bloody armed forces of twenty-eight years of experience and cognition layer after layer, exposing the truest self, with the tragic and solemn sacrifice, and finally making up the determination. But now it seems that it is all just a joke.
However, he has imagined meeting this child countless times in the future. And he has already felt that a tender seed is quietly germinating in his body. He has begun to expect that he will have a person who loves him wholeheartedly and unconditionally. But it is too late to meet the person. It is only farewell before even meeting each other.
It was not until the moment when he was sure that he would lose it that Shen Dai understood why he was so persistent and even got a little crazy wanting to give birth to this child. It was because he wanted to have a family. He didn’t have parents in the real sense. His grandma couldn’t be with him anymore after a few years. The heart he put on Qu Moyu was crushed to the ground. In the near future, when grandma is gone, he will have no family members left. Without his family, he would have no place to call home. Just thinking about it, he would be engulfed by the boundless loneliness.
His heart is full of despair and helplessness. Perhaps this is his destiny.
Seeing Shen Dai’s soulless appearance, the doctor comforted him: “Kid, you are still young. You will have a new life and you will find an alpha who can breed offspring with you. Let’s just move forward.”
Shen Dai quickly wiped away the dripping tears and said in a hoarse voice, “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me. I couldn’t even help you.”
“Can you help me arrange the surgery as soon as possible to wash off the mark?” Shen Dai tried desperately to restrain himself but his vocal cords kept shaking, “It’s better today. It’s better if it is now.”
He will ‘return’ the ‘mark’ to Qu Moyu as an engagement gift for him.
“It’s too hasty.” The doctor looked at his watch. “A series of examinations needed to be done. I see your current mental state and I think you are not suitable for surgery. Let’s take a good rest for a few days before making any arrangements.”
“My body is healthy and there is no problem.” Shen Dai stubbornly stared into the doctor’s eyes, “I want to wash off the marks immediately.” The smell of ebony wood that once made him fascinated now made him feel disgusted to even think about for a second. When he smelled it around him, he wanted to get rid of this ‘mark’ immediately. He wanted to get rid of the ‘mark’ that Qu Moyu left on his body and soul. He wanted to never have anything to do with the person who forced him to kill his own child.
The doctor was embarrassed and looked at his watch again: “This time is really too hasty.” He picked up the phone on the table, “Xiao Zhao, come to my office.”
After a while, a nurse knocked on the door and came in. Mrs. Qu, who was waiting at the door, followed and asked Shen Dai through her eyes.
Shen Dai looked at her blankly with a dead silence in his eye as a reply.
Madam Qu’s expression quickly dimmed.
The doctor and nurse were discussing whether the operation could be timed out, and at the same time, they also respectfully asked Mrs. Qu for her opinion.
“Are you going to have an operation today?” Mrs. Qu gave Shen Dai a worried look, “You don’t have to be in such a hurry. I’ll settle you first. It’s too hasty today.”
Shen Dai shook his head stiffly: “Please. I want to wash off the mark right away.” This nightmarish alpha pheromone, while releasing physiological dependence and sweet memories, shows ruthless words and deeds and cruel disgust. The cold breath of sandalwood no longer gave him joy and fantasy. But instead, it was like the thorny vines entangling him, constantly twisting, around him again and again, draining his blood, taking his breath, giving him endless pain and fear.
He just wanted to get away.
Mrs. Qu looked at Shen Dai silently for a while, and then asked the doctor, “Can we arrange it today?”
The doctor said helplessly: “We don’t recommend being so hasty seeing that Mr. Shen’s physical condition is not very good. But if Mr. Shen strongly requests, we can work overtime.” He confirmed to Shen Dai again, “Mr. Shen, washing off the marks and abortion needs to be done together. Are you ready?”
Shen Dai stared blankly at the doctor. Is he going to kill this kid together? Today? Now?
Is he ready?
“Do you have to.. do it together?” Shen Dai murmured.
The nurse said softly, “These two items are recommended to be done together. After using anaesthesia, the foetus will not be able to survive. Although washing off the ‘mark’ is a minimal invasive operation, the impact of abortion on the body is relatively large. I’m afraid your body can’t take it all at once.”
Shen Dai lowered his head slightly and stared at his abdomen motionlessly. He has never been more helpless than this moment. And he has never made a more difficult decision than this.
“Mr. Shen, you can think about it again. For the sake of your body.”
In Shen Dai’s chaotic brain, an incandescent electric light suddenly flashed. It was like a praying meteor he desperately wanted to ‘catch’. He suddenly raised his head and stared at the nurse: “I can just wash off the ‘mark’?”
The nurse was startled by his bright pupils: “Huh?”
“If I wash off the ‘mark’, can this child use a substitute pheromone?” Shen Dai turned to look at the doctor, as if a drowning man had grabbed on a life-saving straw.
The doctor was also at a loss: “What do you mean?”
Mrs. Qu also looked at Shen Dai quizzically. She began to worry about Shen Dai’s mental state.
“It’s only three weeks old and hasn’t grown yet. The alpha pheromone doesn’t have much effect on him, right?” Shen Dai stood up excitedly, “If I wash off the ‘mark’ now, without this mark, it can use substitute pheromones, right?!”
The nurse looked at Shen Dai with some sympathy: “Mr. Shen, you may not have heard clearly. You need anaesthesia for the operation. The anaesthesia will cause damage to the foetus..”
“No anaesthetic then.”
The three people in the room looked at Shen Dai in shock.
Shen Dai’s face was pale and sluggish, with only a pair of eyes looking sober and firm.
The old doctor took off his glasses and wiped the sweat from his forehead, as if he couldn’t believe what he had heard.
“Doctor, you just said that as long as there is no such ‘mark’, I can use alternative pheromones to assist fertility.” Shen Dai clenched his fists tightly, his nails digging deep into the flesh, he traded pain for incomparable sobriety, ” Before it takes shape and doesn’t have much dependence on alpha pheromones, help me wash off the ‘mark’ now. And I can.. do it without anaesthesia.”
The nurse took a deep breath: “This.. Mr. Shen, this is crazy. Although washing off the ‘mark’ is only a minimal invasive surgery, it is a local anaesthetic operation. It is still a surgery after all. And that kind of pain is not something ordinary people can bear.”
Shen Dai said word by word: “I’m not an ordinary person.”
Mrs. Qu came back to her senses and pulled Shen Dai aside: “Ah Dai, are you crazy? You won’t take anaesthesia?! You.. you don’t have to do this. Although Mo Yu is my son, ..no one deserves this. “
“My child deserves this.” Shen Dai held Mrs. Qu’s hand gently and smiled, “I’m not doing this for him. Maybe this sentence is not firm enough now, but when I wash off the ‘mark’, when we are no longer related, by then, my child is just my child. I am doing this for myself.”
Mrs. Qu looked at Shen Dai fixedly. Her tears suddenly fell. She held Shen Dai’s hand tightly and said with a smile as if crying, “If I were half as brave as you, I wouldn’t be in pain for a lifetime. Go on. Don’t let yourself regret it like me.”
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Next update: 2022.06.16
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*Translator’s note: Honest to God, I cried when I read this chapter for the first time. I know what it’s like to lose a child so.. yeah. It impacted me a lot. I’m happy SD can keep his child despite knowing that this child is a liability for him. -K