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"Please~ you'll definitely find the ghost house interesting!"

"I, DON'T, WANT!"

I ignore Himeji, who's tugging at me. However, she continues to tug at me as I drag her. That's really troublesome. Just as I intend to shrug her away, something seems to be heading for us.

"End of the line, Yuuji—no, the ugly guy over there!"

"These dumb movements..is it Akihisa?"

Appearing in a dumb manner is the male mascot I just found. What the heck, a change of costumes?

"How rude! I—no, wait, since when is Noi Noi dumb?"

"Shut up! What's wrong with calling out an idiot who's wearing the mascot head the other way around!"

What's supposed to be a cute and cuddly doll now has its head turned backwards because of Akihisa, and now it's a bone-chilling creature.

"..Yuuji, Noi Noi's just a kid."

"Shouko, a creature that can put the head wrongly will be annihilated by society."

You'll die if you don't watch yourself. An existence like him can only exist at the bottom of the food chain.

"Ah, Akihisa-kun, your head's turned backwards! Ahh! The kids were crying once they saw you!"

"Wah, this isn't good! No wonder I can't see what's in front!"

"Hurry up and put the head properly, or Sakamoto-kun will find out!"

To think that you can actually fool me till now, these two are really a match for each other.

"Ah, sorry to keep you waiting."

An even more troublesome person is here—the fake foreigner from just now. To think that he actually caught up to us so quickly.

"Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head to the haunted house."

"Didn't I say that I don't want to!?"

I don't want to deliberately enter that dangerous place.

"If you refuse, I'll send a large amount of food to your house."

"Don't do that! If you do, my family's lives will be at risk!"

My mum won't even bother about what to do unless we finish up all the food. How can this guy be so vicious?

"Speaking of which, Akihisa-kun, who's the female university student who was with you? To think that you have the time to chase after other girls even during this important situation.."

"Eh? What are you talking about? I never—hm? Why are you taking you phone out? Who're you calling here?"

"I think Minami will be here soon. Before that, please explain clearly."

"No, no way! If there's a bloodshed incident on opening day, the ratings of this theme park will—GYYAH! I feel that someone's rushing at me angrily! I'll do anything, kneel, beg for forgiveness, just don't kill me!!"

The two fantasy creatures are having a couple's quarrel. What an unbelievable scene.

"Miss Sakamoto Shouko, you may hug your boyfriend when you enter the haunted house in any way that you want."

"..Yuuji, I want to go."

"You're really despicable. Actually thinking of using Shouko to force me into the trap! And who asked you to randomly change Shouko's surname! Her surname's Kirishima!"

"..Don't worry, it'll become Sakamoto soon."

Without noticing it, Shouko again controls my arm. If so, I can't resist!

"Okay, then please sign here."

The fake foreigner pulls out a document and a pen. What's this?

"Just an ordinary consent form."

We're just entering a haunted house. Is there really a need to sign a consent form? Is it really that dangerous inside?

"Seems interesting."

Since there's a consent form, it should mean that there's something that's really scary inside. Maybe it's really interesting.

I'm starting to feel a little interested as I get ready to sign that consent form with the ball-point pen.

'Consent form'

1. I—Sakamoto Yuuji swear to take Kirishima Shouko as my wife, through thick and thin, loving each other for the rest of our lives.

2. I swear that we will get married at Kisaragi Highlands.

3. No matter what happens, I will never leave Kirishima Shouko.

"..Here, Yuuji, here's the seal."

"The inkpad's here."

"Am I the only one? Am I the only one who finds this completely ridiculous!?"

These guys are crazy!

"That's a joke. There's no need to sign this, you can just go in."

"..mn, just joking."

"You guys prepared the carbon papers, and you actually dare say that you're joking!"

I really have a lot of things to say, but isn't their common sense too cruel or something?

"It'll be rather inconvenient to bring that huge bag around. I'll keep it for you."

"..Sorry to bother you."

Shouko hands her bag over to the fake foreigner. Speaking of which, her bag's really huge.

"..The contents inside may spillover, so please don't put it horizontally."

"You're talking about this bag? I understand, please don't worry."

Spill out? What's inside that bag?

"Then enjoy to you heart's content."

"..Let's go, Yuuji."

"OWOWOWOWOW! MY ARM'S GOING TO GET TWISTED BY YOU!"

My resistance ends up useless, and after a while, I got dragged by her to the entrance of the haunted house. Did they deliberately try to create the atmosphere? The haunted house has automatic sliding doors, but there's not a single light inside. It feels like someone's making some moves.

"It's me. The prey has already entered the haunted house. We'll start with the plan that Mr Yoshii came up with."

Before the auto-door closed, I could hear the fake foreigner say that.

So Akihisa came up with the plan? I don't know what's going on, but I won't let that guy get what he wants!

Shouko and I continue to walk down this dark corridor. Kk, kk..the the footsteps on the linoleum's a lot clearer than what I expected.

"As expected of a haunted house that's modified from an abandoned hospital, this sure is rare."

"..It's a bit scary."

"It's really rare for you to be afraid even though there's nothing."

"..Maybe."

We continue to move on in the directions mapped out by the sign 'move forward'.

There's nothing on the 1st level, and so we head upstairs. Before we can take a few steps, there finally seems to be something going on.

"—fer—ji—"

With a heart chilling wind, a distorted voice can be heard.

Hm? Is this a cry of agony?

"..Is this voice..Yuuji?"

"Hm? Is that so?"

The voice does sound similar to mine. Most likely, Hideyoshi's imitating my voice.

To hear my own voice without me even speaking, it does feel scary. I thought that Akihisa's plan will be rather simple or something—

"I prefer Himeji to Shouko, and her breasts are bigger."

"..Yuuji, are you ready?"

"Scary! Shouko's face actually became like a Hannya! That's super thrilling!"

How did that damned Akihisa think of such a terrifying method! Is he planning of not letting me escape here alive!?

Just as I'm getting worried, I suddenly hear some sort of mechanism being activated.

Great! Well done! I can protect my own life now.

"Ah, Shouko! Something seemed to have appeared!"

Turning to where the sound came from, something appeared at the originally empty place . That is—

"..How kind of them."

—A mace?

That damned Akihisa! He actually prepared everything! Though they messed up on how it's supposed to be scary, this is one super duper scary haunted house!

"..Yuuji, where are you going to escape to?"

Wielding the mace, my childhood friend came pursuing after me in this new method of playing, and I got chased for an entire hour.

However, does Akihisa really think that this will bring Shouko and me together?

☆

I continued to escape as I tried to explain to Shouko that Hideyoshi was mimicking my voice, and finally managed to calm her down and bring her out from the house.

"It's been tough on you! How about that? Do you two feel like getting married?"

"Only you and that idiot Akihisa will think this will make us get married.."

Forget about creating a gap between us, I'm feeling that the divide between me and Shouko just got wider.

"That's strange? I though those couples who pass through adversity together won't have such a problem with each other.."

"Well, ya, it would have been possible if the crisis didn't come from the ones who should be together.."

This fake foreigner's brain shouldn't be any different from Akihisa, right?

But now at least I can relax a bit. If it's a plan Akihisa came up with, there wouldn't be any delinquents coming up to threaten or extort me. If so, I don't have to keep thinking of ways to escape..how troublesome. If possible, I really want to go home now.

"..About time to eat lunch."

Shouko stares above the fountain as she mutters. The large clock that's in that direction indicates that it's 1pm. That's right, it's about time to eat.

"..That, my bag--"

"Yes, we prepared a deluxe meal for both guests. Please follow me."

The fake foreigner walks away after saying this.

They actually prepared lunch for us. That entrance ticket sure isn't for show.

"What's wrong, Shouko?"

"..Nothing."

"?"

What's with that lonely look on her face out of a sudden?

"..Yuuji, if we don't hurry up, we won't be able to catch up with him."

"Hm, you're right."

Maybe believing that we will follow him, the fake foreigner has already walked quite some distance. Well, since he said that they prepared a meal for us, we'll let him treat us.

I hurriedly walk away, and after a walk, what appears in front of me is a trendy-looking restaurant.

"Please enjoy the meal that we'll be preparing for you here."

Immediately, the fake foreigner ushered us into a wide hall that seems like a party hall.

There's a round table right in the middle, and there is also a stage and some small tables. The atmosphere now doesn't look like a restaurant, but like a—

"..A quiz show?"

That's right, though there's a lot of luxurious food on the table, this is basically a quiz show that we always see on TV.

"Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, welcome."

Am attendant walks over as he leads us to our seats—what the heck, I know this guy too!

"Why are you dressed up as an attendant, Hideyoshi?"

"Hideyoshi? What are you talking about?"

My classmate shows a poker face. Has this guy gotten into character? Seems like it's hard to rip this guy's mask off.

I'll just use the useful tool that I used on Akihisa!

"Since you deny it, I'll just confirm it."

I pull out my phone and look for a name in the phonebook called 'Kinosheeta Hideyoshi'. But before I could press the call button, the attendant beside me immediately took action.

"Ah, my phone slip!"

Hideyoshi (?) pulls out his phone and threw it hard at the fountain. Ploop, the sound of something landing in the water can be heard.

"Is, is there a need to go to such an extent? Your phone will definitely spoil!"

"I don't understand what you're saying."

Hideyoshi continues to give me the poker face.

Even if he doesn't really use it, to throw the handphone away without a second thought..the enemy's thoroughly into character.

"Then, if you allow me, please."

"Ah, ooh.."

We're led by the attendant to the center of the hall.

"As the two guests are underaged, we've prepared these drinks for you."

After we sat down, the attendant pours some non-alcoholic champagne into our glasses, not even forgetting to introduce us the brand of this champagne. He's really into it, as expected of someone from the drama society.

"Please enjoy your appetiser."

After putting down the glasses the dishes are served onto this table. Seeing the luxurious food that's only the appetiser, I can only grimace that I'm not used to holding a fork and a knife.

Speaking of which, Shouko should be rather used to this sort of cuisine, right?

Until we finished eating, there doesn't seem to be any traps around. Just as I thought that I can heave a sigh of relief—

"Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for attending this trial trip of Kisaragi Highlands's before it officially opens!"

A loud voice booms throughout the entire hall.

"Actually, in this hall today, there will be a wedding experience event to prepare a high school couple!"

Some of the drink I just gulped down accidentally sputtered out of the nose.

"We at Kisaragi Corporation wish to encourage this couple and created such a scheme! The scheme is called the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show~"

A heavy sound of the entrance being locked can be heard from the entrance. To actually cut off my escape route, damn you Akihisa! Seems like you have grasped how I would think!

"The content of this scheme is simple. You just need to answer all the 5 provided questions to enjoy the wedding of the highest class! Of course, if you wish, there's no problems with directly registering as a couple."

That's a huge problem, you big idiot.

"Then Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, please stand on the stage in front!"

As the host earnestly pointed in our direction, everyone in the restaurant turned around to look at us.

"..A wedding experience..I'll do my best!"

"Calm down Shouko. A wedding has to be agreed by both sides—OWWWWW!!! MY EARS ARE ABOUT TO BE RIPPED OFF! I'LL GO! I'LL GO! JUST LET ME GO!"

I continue to keep telling myself that this is just an experience, but I still feel unhappy as I step on on the stage.

With the workers leading us, Shouko and I are assigned to our seats.

"Okay, the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show begins now!"

There's a huge button between Shouko and me, and it seems like a standard answering system where we have to press the button before answering.

Well..if I get the answer correct, I'll get a prize, but if I answer a few questions wrongly, this event will be a bust, right? Seems like I'll just have to keep answering wrongly.

"And the first question is up!"

I reach my hand out for the button as I wait for the question.

Come on, show me what questions you have..

"When is Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko's wedding anniversary?"

That's too strange! I don't even understand what this question is about!?

—Ding dong!

Damn it! Before I even noticed, Shouko actually pressed the button. But even if it's Shouko, she can't possibly answer a question that has a non-existent answer—

"Alright, let's have Miss Shouko with the answer!"

"..Everyday's our wedding anniversary."

"DON'T SAY IT SHOUKO! I'LL BANG MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT!!"

"Brillant! That's the correct answer!"

That's the correct answer!?

I glare at the host; he actually glanced at me from an angle where the audience can't see him. What the heck! So this was pre-planned! Do you really want us to have a wedding experience?

Find then, if so—I'll show you my passion!

"Second question! Where will the wedding be held?"

—Ding dong!

I quickly pressed the button down as I lean near the mic to say the correct answer. These questions aren't questions now, they're just interrogations. But it doesn't matter. If I give a wrong answer, that's nothing!

"Okay, will Mr Sakamoto Yuuji please answer!"

"Miso-stewed Mackerel!"

"Correct answer!"

"What?"

How can such a thing happen! You asked for the location, so how can my miso-stewed mackerel answer be correct!?

"The wedding of these two will be held at the phoenix room our Kisaragi hotel, also known as the 'Miso-stewed Mackerel'.

"Hold on! You just came up with this nickname, right!? There has to be a limit to this!"

"Third question! Where did the couple first meet?"

No way, they aren't listening to me..but if so, I can guess what they're thinking. I have to say the wrong answer this time. Got to be faster than Shouko and say the wrong answer—

"..Don't you think of doing that."

—Pwoosh.

"OOOOWWWWW!!! MY EYESS! MMMYYY EEEEEYYYYEEEEESSSS!!!"

—Ding dong.

"Okay, will Miss Shouko answer?"

"..Elementary school."

"Correct answer! These two first met each other in elementary school, and after a long time of dating, they're finally about to be married today! Just an intimate pair of childhood friends!"

Didn't he just see my eyes getting poked hard? Since when has our relationship reached such an extent that it can be considered intimate!?

It's too late to answer the question after hearing it, so I have to get the right to answer before Shouko does. If so—

"Next, the fourth question!"

—Ding dong!

Before the host could say the answer, I already pressed the button. Now I can give an answer before being stopped! Though I don't know the question, I'll be 100% correct if I just answer 'I don't know'.

"I don't—"

"Correct answer! Up next, the last question!"

WOAH! He just ignored my answer! Did he give this reply because I ignored the question? I can't even answer a question wrongly now. Just as I'm thinking about giving up—

"Oi~ is there something wrong? We're also about to get married, why is it that only that high school couple can have such special treatment~"

The savior with the irritating tone has arrived.

Just as everyone start to look around for that guy who spoke, he walked up to the stage without anyone asking him to.

"Dear guests, we're having an event not. Sorry, but can you—"

"AHH? STOP YAPPING OVER THERE! WE'RE GUESTS, YOU UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION!?"

The coffee-haired guy with piercings threatened the workers.

I actually wanted to mention that those two look familiar. So they're actually the delinquent couple that continued to pester the fake foreigner when we first entered.

"We have a wedding experience as well~"

"Bu, but, this—"

"DIDN'T WE TELL YOU TO STOP YAPPING ABOUT? WE WANT TO ENTER THE QUIZ SHOW. ARE YOU DUMB OR DID YOU NOT HEAR US!?"

"YEAH! HOW ABOUT THAT! WE'LL COME UP WITH THE QUESTION. IF THEY ANSWER IT CORRECTLY, THEY WIN. IF WE ANSWER IT WRONGLY, WE WIN!"

"How, how can it be—"

Ignoring the panicking workers, the delinquent couple stride onto the stage and grab a mic.

Once in a million chance! That host will definitely ignore my answer, but if it's these duo, I may have a chance to escape.

Next, I just need to prevent Shouko from answer..

"..Yu, Yuuji?"

I held Shouko's hand as I put my hand on the contestant's table. If so, she can't poke her fingers into my eye. Now all I need to do is just to give them a wrong answer, and everything will be OK!

"Okay, here's the question."

The hoodlum deliberately rolls his tongue and says in a tone that's hard to hear out.

Come on, what's the question?

Relax, no matter how simple the question is, I can answer it wrongly—

"WHAT'S THE CAPITAL OF EUROPE?"

".."

I can't even answer this.

"Oi, hurry up and answer! Don't you know?"

I really don't know what's the answer. In my memory, Europe was never designated as a 'country'. It's impossible to answer this question at all.

"..Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, congratulations on winning the 'Kisaragi Highlands' wedding experience' prize!"

"OI, hold up! These two haven't answered at all! We should be the winners, right?"

"How is that possible? Is that host an idiot!?"

As the idiotic couple continue to create a ruckus, the stage ended.

To think that there's a bigger idiot than Akihisa in this world..this world sure is huge.

☆

"Congratulations to you two to be able to win this free wedding experience. You two are lucky."

"..I'm so happy."

Once we walked out the restaurant, the fake foreigner immediately carries Shouko's bag as he walks towards us. Really, what lucky? You guys planned this right from the beginning.

"Oh yeah, Shouko, what's in your bag? Why is it so big?"

"..No, it's nothing.."

Shouko's reply seems to be a little troubled. What's going on?

However, this person here is someone who'll bring my important stamp around, so it's not strange to see her bring such a large bag.

"Miss Shouko, for the wedding experience, can you please follow this worker and get ready?"

A 30+ woman walks up to us from behind the fake foreigner and bows to us. She looks just like a professional who specializes in dressing up wedding gowns on others.

"Hello, we've met for the first time. I'll be in charge of putting the wedding gown on this Miss here. For this event to be an unforgettable success, please allow me to help you dress up as the prettiest bride."

The female worker smiles earnestly at Shouko.

Oi oi oi, aren't you playing it too seriously? You even got a specialist to come all the way here?

If so, Kisaragi Highlands wasn't planning to promote their facilities right from the start, but the wedding experience we're going to have? Seems like my time is wasted on this mock wedding.

"If so, don't I have to wait for quite some time?"

"Please rest assured, as for Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, we've already heard from Mr Yoshii—no, that's not right, we've already thought of the best way to deal with you."

"There's no need to hide it now. Did Akihisa give you any instructions?"

I suddenly have a bad feeling about this.

"Yes, he said to use this on Mr Sakamoto Yuuji first."

While saying this, he pulls out something that looks like a taser (200,000 volts).

"Because Mr Sakamoto Yuuji may think of escaping, Mr Yoshii's instruction is to use this taser to knock you out and then change you into the bridegroom's outfit."

"A, AAAAAKKKKKKIIIIHHHHIIIIIIISSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!"

"Please endure this for a while."

Before I can hear the terrifying bzzt sound from behind, I got knocked out just like that.

☆

"And now, we'll have the main event of today, the wedding experience! Will all guests please applaud the bridegroom!"

The loud applause seems like it covers the entire theme park. I thought that these guests were air to come here, but even the ordinary guests can't help but applaud on hearing this.

"Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please stand on the stage."

The fake foreigner who's standing on the stage whispered to me.

How about I try to beat this guy down and immediately run away?

"If you still want to resist, I'll put sea urchins and brown brushes together as a sashimi plate and send it over to you house."

Uu! If that's sent to my house, my mum will think that they're all sea urchins and eat the brown brushes together..

"Really can't stand you..oh well, at least that's just an experience. I'll just play along.."

In order to let the fake foreigner relax, I deliberately said these words of giving up struggling in a voice loud enough for him to hear.

These guys must be planning to go all the way from exchanging rings to the oath and the kiss. They probably want to use this entire sequence to spread it out to the public and force Shouko and me to get married. But if society's to see this and find me with another girl, I'll get talked about. Frustrating, but a skillful way of forcing us to get married. To come up with such a plan—though they haven't considered the problem of misusing the image rights, the enemy's a famous enterprise, so they will have a way.

If so, I'll just have to escape before the oath is said, and best if everyone can see it. Maybe I can feign illness..they can only end this if they can't handle me. As long as I get away from here, it doesn't matter what happens later.

"Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head up the stage."

"Okay okay."

Dong dong dong, I climb up the slightly steep steps. When I got onto the stage, the scene in front of me makes me somewhat dizzy.

"Oi, that can't be it..what's with this setup!?"

What appeared in front of me are numerous lights and a full audience like a concert. Everything, the dry ice equipment, the balls and smoke are all set up. And there're all sorts of lighting experts around.

"And now, a brief introduction of the bridegroom's life—"

Oh? Introducing my life? That's not too different from a real wedding. Seems like even with the final goal in mind, they got every minor detail in place as well. The quiz show just now was the same as well. Seems like they got lots of details from Akihisa—

"—we'll ignore that."

That's too shoddy!

"Haiz! No need to introduce him in the first place."

"We have no interest in that in the first place~"

"We just need to know that there are people who aren't worthy of being at our wedding place."

"That's right~"

The jerks sitting in front create such a ruckus.

The voices..so it's that delinquent couple in the quiz show just now.

They're in the front row, yet they continue to yap away like nobody's business. These two's etiquette are as lousy as their looks.

"..In order to avoid creating disturbance to the other guests, will those below the stage, please avoid creating a huge commotion."

"Were they just talking about us?"

"No way, we're guests!"

"You're right~"

"Humph, even if they're talking about us, we have no need to be mindful about that. The main thing is that we're not satisfied. Isn't that right, isn't that more important?"

"That's right, that's right! Well said, Ryouta!"

The self-centered couple continues to increase their volume without any restraint.

The organizers should be really wishing that they can get rid of these meddlesome people, but these jerks that are making such a ruckus are tougher for them to handle. Since this is a promotional event, there'll be no point to this is there's negative feedback, so they can only leave those two alone.

"And now, the bride will be here."

The BGM got deliberately louder as it reaches my ears, and all the lights are switched off. A light smoke rises from the feet, and it can't be denied that there's a wedding atmosphere here.

-->>

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