Before (After 5)

Chapter 64

This is a dangerous game I’m playing, I’m walking along the most fragile line, but I’ve developed a talent for balancing. If she moves in with me, she’ll see how ready I am to be better for her. She’ll see that one mistake counts for very little compared to how much I love her, compared to what I can become for her.

Her mouth is hungry on mine. She’s an expert at this; her tongue moves with mine, and with every sound of hers I swallow, I become more infatuated. I push my hand through her soft hair, desperately trying to get closer to her somehow. I press my body against her, needing some friction on my cock before I combust. The relief rushing through my body when I rub against her is frightening to me. She controls my mind and my body, and I don’t know what she’ll do with them.

I lean up on my elbow, taking in her beauty. Her mouth is dark pink now, and inside my mind I’m running through an entire book of things I crave to do to her. My other hand traces the soft pink lace across her chest; the thin fabric is barely holding her in.

Patiently and ever so gently, I trace my fingers over the cup, under the strap, and I push my fingers inside the fabric and feel the hard pebbles of her nipples. She’s fucking heaven. “I can’t decide if I want this to stay on . . .” I could spend every hour of every day with her lying here, waiting for my touch. I apply a pinch of pressure to her nipples, and she moans in surprise.

I want her breasts bare in my hands. “Off it goes,” I groan. I’m horny and impatient, and when she arches her back as I unclasp the small hooks, I nearly come in my boxers. I palm her fleshy tits, pushing them up and then down just to watch the perfect way they move. Her tits are perfect—she’s my living fetish. “What do you want to do, Tess?”

I want to do every fucking thing with her. I want to do things I’ve never done, and experience things from my past in a new way. “I already told you before,” she whines, pushing her chest against my hand. Such a horny little freak she is.

Are we ready? Is she ready? I think she’s ready. She’s panting, and I can see the crotch of her panties glistening under the light of the lamp.

I run my hand down her stomach and to the hem of her lacy panties. I try to control myself, but she moans and I need to hear more of my favorite sounds. Fuck me, she’s got me wrapped around her finger.

My fingers move to her pussy, and I tap gently over the swollen mound, feeling how much she soaked her panties. Her sweet scent fills the air, and I want to taste her. I push my fingers into her, pumping into her to the knuckle. She cries out, and her sounds seep into me as she wraps her arms around me to steady her jerking body. She’s tight around my two fingers, and she gasps each time they enter her pussy.

Tessa’s hands are frantic as she finds my thickness, palming and squeezing and stroking me through my boxers.

“You’re sure?” I ask her. I need her to be absolutely positive about this. I need this to be as perfect for her as it will be for me.

It takes a breath for Tessa to realize that I’m speaking to her. Her mouth is open, eyes wide. “Yes, I’m sure. Stop overthinking it.”

I lean my head down and chuckle against her neck. The irony of this is killing me. She’s the one usually overthinking everything, but I’m the one who is now. I’m so close to finally having her, and it’s tainted by the stupid Bet. The guilt I’ve been holding on to since I grew to love her is flowing through me. I’m battling within myself: the good boy who loves the good girl and the bad boy who’s too broken to love anyone are fighting with swords. Each one wants something different from the princess. The boy in black gets knocked to the ground.

“I love you. You know that, don’t you?” I say into her mouth. Can she taste my panic?

If she can, she doesn’t show it. “Yes . . .” She kisses me, slowly and softly. “I love you, Hardin.”

Tessa’s legs are gently kicking out as if her body can barely handle the pleasure of my fingers sinking in and out of her tightness. She’s a whimpering mess for me as images flicker through my mind of her body writhing beneath mine while I break her skin and claim her body. Not until she makes the first move . . . I set up a boundary to keep. My mouth moves to her neck to claim her in a different way. I suck at the soft skin there, feeling the heat of blood rushing beneath the surface. She’s mine.

“Hardin . . . I’m . . .” she whimpers when I leave her empty. She’s so ripe, so ready to be fucking devoured. Suddenly I’m a starving man. I need my mouth on her. I scoot back on the bed and pull off her panties and spread her thighs. The smell is so sweet, so intoxicating, I’ve never experienced anything close to this hunger roaring inside of me. My lips peck a tender trail down her stomach. She’s soaked. I can’t help but blow on it and delight in the way she moans, lifting her ass off the bed. I dive in.

Her taste fills my senses as my tongue swipes wide licks up and down her. With each moan, my tongue licks harder, more precisely, and she fists her white sheets to keep from screaming.

“Tell me how good it feels,” I say, making sure to blow a breath against her with each word.

She chokes out, “So . . .”

I suck at her and lick her into a shaking, whimpering state.

I want to give her all the encouragement she needs. “That’s it, baby, come for me, I need to feel it on my tongue.” She obeys. I’m high with her as she orgasms for me. I’m no longer drunk with liquor; now I’m drunk with power.

I climb up her body, my cock probing at her stomach, and kiss her. She snaps out of her sated state and kisses me hard. She’s already ready for more. I’m impressed. “Are you . . .” I ask her, to be sure.

She nods frantically, lifting her lips to mine. “Shh . . . Yes, I’m sure,” Tess begs. The sharp ends of her fingernails dig into my back as she takes my mouth again. Her lips suck at mine, her tongue pushes through my lips, and I’m high again. Her hands push my briefs down my ass and legs, and the sensation of being bare and so fucking hard against her skin has me manic.

I need to be inside of her—I have to make her body mine.

This is going to change everything. Neither of us will ever be the same again. She will no longer be an innocent girl; she will be a woman with a sex life. She will have to check the sexually active box at the doctor’s office. She will get married one day and have to tell the guy that she fucked me. Any talk of her past sexual experiences will be filled with me. I feel immense guilt but extreme satisfaction. It’s a liberating but frightening experience.