ng cheeks even more prominent. When he walks, it makes the click-clack sound of tiny little heels, probably giving him a greater height advantage if I were on the ground.

"His royal highness, Prince Erik Wief Hohenstaufen Heinrich, has graced your party with a question." an impudent maid speaks up.

Slap her. Go on fake maids, and Vedette, go slap her silly.

But they are not mind readers and even if I did say that out loud they would not do so.

As the eldest senior in the party, Matilda curtsies and answers properly on our behalf. The standard procedures blah blah blah. Behind the stupid prince, his maids give a tense cold stare off. I'm sure there's a maid battle going on. The realistic thinly veiled with words kind, not the sexy slapping kind.

"Why are you out! Are you feeling better? Don't go out if you're sick, stay inside and be healthy enough to grow up!"

The silent maid battle flies over the arrogant little prince's head, despite his high heels.

"...." I look over to Georgie, eyes imploring for help.

It would be unwise to uh be myself in this situation. Should I play like I'm dying again?

"Who dat?! Hi hi! I'm Lily! And dit is my Rosa! We likey cheese. " Lilyanne swings her feet in Isnada's hold, waving her little hands in hello. Taking over the situation naturally.

Wait...she doesn't remember him. At all?!

Wow, this love story is going great. Where's my rice cracker popcorn?

"You don't know who I am?!" points the prince, exclaiming in kiddy indignation.

"Hmmmm ummmm....home wrecker!" Lilyanne caws out, her new favorite word apparently.

"What?!! No, we met before!"

"Home wrecker?! Dis one has fat funny hat, funny hat heehee. "

"How-how dare you-"

"Aaaand faaat face like fat lady. Heee hee. Oh. Ohhhhh not home wrecker. Ohhhh. "

Turning to me she nods in understanding and her own conclusions. The mystery of her developing mind making all sorts of new connections I never could have conceived.

"Big bruders Amar and Yuna are home wreckers." she purposefully tilts her head as she cutely frames her face with her hands. The angelic face imitating both named boys in their own way, from Amar's sleepy smile to Yuna's grumpy pout. Not bad for her age. All before turning truly sour. "Hmmmm big bruder owie Lukas too," she growls as if remembering her own mother being stolen.

The wound still too fresh I see.

I have nothing to say to that, so I simply smile and nod at her in praise. Good Lilyanne. Let's not like boys. Yes, boys are gross and dirty and if you dare pick up a harem I shall sick father on you. That should help deter things.

"Wh-what?!!! Who are those!? The...But I- I- I'm a bigger better homewrecker!" the ugliest dressed prince trembles, not understanding a thing but not taking well to being ignored.

"Nooooooooooo" Lily points back and over to Georgie, "bigger homewrecker! Much bigger. You a funny egg head, heeehee, fat lady face. "

Amazing.

Sister dear I do so love you, as silly as you are. We're working on it in general but please keep antagonizing your beloved stupid prince.

Bowed on the sidelines Georgie returns my look with a pleading one of his own. He didn't expect to be named, let alone like that. Now the tiny royal angrily pouts, stomping his foot as he glares into Georgie's direction.

Why didn't we escape faster earlier? Why? His blank brown eyes tell me he wasn't expecting anything like this and now he knows.

"You! Lowly serf! Don't think just becuase you're a big kid that....OH! I challenge you to duel for the honor of who is the bigger homewrecker! I, prince Er-Aaack!"

While dashing prince Erik continues to own himself bigger than any fool on stage, the dark silent aura of his governess comes up to wack him in the back of the neck into silence and submission.

Good. Because I was going to order Georgie to slap him maid style.

"It appears, the children are simply too excited to play." she coldly excuses, catching the dizzy prince, her face porcelain and stone.

"Yes. Tis the nature of children. " Matilda agrees.

"Can't be helped."

"So rambunctious."

"We bid thee a pleasant evening."

"And to thee."

Every maid reciting the general agreement in various tones of voice.

Like a showdown stalemate, they curtsy and breeze past each other. Backs straight, skirts, scarves, and jewels flashing in the silent battle that all women know too well. Even Georgie gets in on the fun! Left-right left right and hiiiips, pose!

They must walk and strut very carefully. One wrong move and it very well could end up in a show worthy mean girls maid fight.

But that doesn't happen. Slapping fights don't happen every day, shame.

"Bu-but -" the stupid prince tries putting up a fight as his governess carries him away. If I bothered looking behind me I might even see sad blue eyes staring as his lost baby lady love. Too bad, so sad.

"Lilyanne....do you remember that one?"

"Ummmm, dat Isnada!" she points up to the maid carrying her. Eyes expectant at me to praise her for getting the answer right.

Good enough.

It's more than expected, that if not present or seen in a regular sense, a small child would easily forget things or people. The boy who 'played' with crabs and her a year ago is completely wiped out. Even if this terrible tragic comedy is inevitable in the long term, for now they know nothing. And there's little to no Prince Erik in Lilyanne's innocent mind.

"Lily...there's no need to remember the fatty egg head ok? "

"Heeehee the big fat pretty lady sing laaaaaaa hoooooolaaalala!~"

"Yes. Yes that is...uh, exactly how the opera singer went. Wonderful job Lily. But try words next?"

"Laaaalaaaa~ Singy a song dat we don't know, let's sing it...ummmmaahhhhhhhhhhhh an oooooooo!"

It's 'let's sing it high and sing it low', that what I tried teaching her for vocal control. Ah my poor ears.

In the future, Lilyanne's voice is most closely labeled as a soprano. Her harp wasn't her only instrument. A voice like the calling of angels, so the masses praised. A siren of purity yet borderline temptation the fanboys described.

Oh cringe much?

Now don't get me wrong, she made a wonderful soprano. Would not fail any choir auditions, especially with lungs stronger than you expect from her weak frame. But anything really special? Hmmm my modern senses say no

These people have never heard of oh say any internationally renowned pop or rock star, ever? Talk to me when someone starts bopping. They don't make much music out of common tone or scores?!

Hell, the piano hasn't even been invented, thus why I am trapped with the trashcan torture that is the harpsichord.

I have been forced to start practicing again. Ugh awful.

At least I don't sing and dance on command like the trained monkey that is my sister. Puppy? When do I get a human to deal with? Do I have to wait till she's...5? Puberty?

While I was deep in thought, the maids and Georgie carrying us back to the auditorium, a strange commotion started going on. Theatre employees were rushing out and around as if a mass fire had erupted, which it didn't. No smoke or anything of the sort. But a mass panic none the less. With the audience still all inside, none the wiser.

"She couldn't have gotten far! Find her! Find her!!!"

Some angry authoritative figures, panicking backstage employees, a missing girl. Can it be? A runaway actress?!

"But they've stolen the 8 horse rider carriage!"

"How would you all let them?!"

"The next act begins in 13 minutes sir! What do we do?!"

"The understudy! Where is she?!"

"That was the understudy! The prima donna has laryngitis!"

"The under understudy!"

"Does that position even exist?"

"Cursed couple. Oh love simply ruins everything!!!"

Amen sister. Or whoever said that.

On the sidelines, our little party has taken a step back to avoid the commotion. All for safety of course. We're not shamelessly eavesdropping or anything.

Oh who am I kidding? This is great!

"Georgie, I have decided I much prefer this show."

"You know.....it's a horrible thing to happen of course!....And actually not all that bad."

He is tempted. Sorely tempted in the same vein that ignores me to watch funky operas and dramatizes things to the point the Rosalia Translation Filter System has to come in to play. In a way he's no better than the gossipy young maids back at home. It just needs to be good gossip and oh boy, isn't this just exciting?

"When the pathway clears, we shall escort the young ladies back." Matilda says, eyes not even open.

"Awwww. Booo." I express.

"Well, I guess that's that." Georgie reluctantly goes along with it, his duties and orders more important than the great show going on outside the theatre hall.

Well until then, we can watch a bit longer. It really is a better show.

I wonder what shall happen to the eloping understudy? Or what the panicking staff and theater directer will do in say a little over 10 minutes. Problem. Inetensifer. Plots, oh all the makings of a decent story. Bravo real life, bravo.

But the climax of this tale has yet to come. Not without....

"Bwahahahahaha! You think you can just leave like that! With some wet eared nobody! I made you Mia! You're mine Mia! Always mine!!!"

Out of nowhere, the bar lounge we were previously dining at erupts in a mild but dramatic explosion of chairs and tables. The creepy drunk old man laughing manically on the balcony.

Then real crashing explosions come. An 8 horse chariot sized one, running through the grand front doors! Great screaming coming from not only surprised staffed all around but the supposed 'Mia', trapped in the carriage as it rides through the hall and drops down the stairs underground. Crazed old man jumping down the grand staircase to ride the tails of it.

Oh great effects. The drama! The intrigue! The pizzazz. Now this is theater!

I am so entertained right now.

"So um, I don't think the way will clear anytime soon?" I pipe up to everyone's silent stares at the new and improved stage.

Great first Act everyone. I look forward to Act 2 and the ending of this story. Highly rated. The food was pretty decent too. Other guests, meh. 4.5/5 stars everyone.