Chapter 99 - Man To Man
historical
ETAN
Etan sat, staring at the gap in the trees where Ayleth had disappeared with Falek. Borsche scanned the rest of the clearing.
"You know," the older man said after a couple minutes, "this isn't how I envisioned us reaching the point where you vowed your life to a woman."
"Me either," Etan said, then smiled. "But honestly, I don't care."
Borsche chuckled, but his smile faded quickly. "That's good, Etan, that's good." Then he got the distant, thoughtful look he often had when they spoke of love and relationships. Etan was about to ask him when Borsche spoke up again. "I thought when the time came we'd know ahead of time and I could prepare you.. we could discuss these things.. before—"
"Uh, thank you, Borsche, but I think I have the wedding night covered," he said with a low chuckle—though his stomach suddenly burst into nervous fluttering like he was a child again. He swallowed quickly.
"It wasn't that that I was speaking of," Borsche said dryly, "Though I suspect there are things I could teach you, welp."
Etan snorted. "I'm sure. But I don't think this is the time—"
"No, but there is something that I must say to you, now, before we move on this path."
Etan took a deep breath. If Borsche was going to try to talk him out of it..
But his man sat back, hands on his knees, and locked eyes with him. "She's perfect for you," he said carefully. "And by all accounts—namely Falek's—you're perfect for her. That's a gift from the Father that you should not take lightly."
"I don't."
Borsche nodded. "But one thing I observe about you, Etan, is that you tend to.. believe you know best." He arched one eyebrow.
Etan frowned. "And?"
Borsche snorted. "And you're about to begin a journey for which you are not prepared. And I know you'll feel like you know what you're doing. But I can promise you, you're about to hit so many obstacles and confusions that you never even anticipated, let alone found the tools to address.. it will threaten your belief in yourself—and perhaps your belief in her as well."
"How? Borsche, she is everything I've ever wanted—more! The Father provided things in her that I didn't even think to ask for."
Borsche nodded. "And there will be things He's provided to you through her that you don't know you need—and things that, many times, you will wish she did not have. And she will feel the same for you. Do not let those seasons convince you that what you have now is a lie. It isn't. It's a frailty of human relationships that we harm each other, even when we don't mean to. But also, sometimes we mean to. And unfortunately, those we are closest too are not only the easiest targets, they are also the ones who can hurt us the most deeply."
Etan nodded. "I've observed this with my parents."
Borsche snorted. "You're about to experience it in an entirely new way, Etan. You are a good man, and a strong one, and when you're my age you'll be a better man than I am. But if you walk into this blindly, if you do not think there's any way for anyone to threaten what you two have, or if you believe you'll never wish to hurt her—or that she'll never wish to hurt you—it will blindside you, and be even more difficult to walk through."
"Borsche," Etan said, with a small smile, "I know I can be frustrating—"
"I believe the word she used was pompous."
"—and she is strong-willed, but when we are together.. it's as if everything else falls away. I can't explain it to you, I've never experienced anything like it before. I.. I want to worship her."
"And the day will come that you'll wish to sacrifice her at the alter of your own ego, Etan, trust me. The difference between successful marriages, and failures, is those who are willing to forgive, and those who are willing to stay even when they're hurt. That's it. Nothing else."
"And I will do those things," Etan said confidently.
Borsche leaned forward, shaking his head. "You're not understanding me, Etan. I'm telling you the day will come that that woman feels like your enemy. And you must be willing to remain attached to her in order to save both of you from your own pride."
Etan swallowed. "I highly doubt that, but—"
"Etan—"
"—I said 'but!'" Etan growled. "But if it does come to that, I will take my vows seriously. I will not allow harm to come to her simply because I am hurt or.. or angry."
"Raging."
"Or raging."
Borsche's lips thinned. "It is good that you see it that way. But please, indulge me: Don't tell yourself it will never happen. Be prepared to take the blow, and then, when it happens, remember that I told you not only that it would occur, but that you would get past it."
"Thank you, Borsche, I will."
"I'm serious, Etan."
"So am I. Truly. Thank you."
They stared at each other a moment, then Borsche got his feet and opened his arms. "Come here, Etan. I am proud of you, son. And your father will be too, when he gets past the rage of being deceived.. and aligned with his enemies."
Etan embraced him and they clapped each other's backs. "Thank you," he said softly.
Borsche shook his head as they stepped back. "I can't believe you're getting married."
"That's assuming that Falek doesn't change her mind," Etan said with a glance towards the trees where they'd disappeared.
Borsche chuckled. "God Himself couldn't change that woman's mind once she's set it, Etan. I don't think you have anything to worry about. Falek worries not about your union, but about how to navigate the politics of it."
Etan sighed. "Him and me both," he muttered under his breath.
Borsche burst out laughing and Etan thought it was the best sound he'd heard in a long time until a soft hand landed on his elbow and the voice he loved above all others murmured, "Are you ready?"
*****
NOTE: There will be no new chapter tomorrow, but there are updates scheduled for the following two days after that! Thank you for your patience!