Chapter 234 – Juan Calberg (3)

A faceless enemy once again appeared before Juan’s eyes. The enemy’s white face cracked open, and a loud roar came out of the mouth that was revealed.

Juan, who had been eating bread in a warm house until just a moment ago, raised his sword with a displeased expression.

He couldn't figure out why he had such a dream, but that didn’t matter to him.

He was more used to a life of slaughtering his enemies under the rain while being drenched in their blood rather than a life of eating warm soup in a comfortable house anyway.

“Ahhhhhhh!”

The moment Juan tried to swing the sword with a loud shout, his head was cut off by a knife swung by the faceless enemy. Juan could see his body swirling around without the top of his head.

Juan stared blankly at the scene until his body completely collapsed to the ground.

The faceless enemy swung his knife toward the ground and splashed the blood stuck to the blade, then soon went looking for another enemy.

Juan’s head sat quietly on the ground and watched the scenes being repeated over and over. He had many questions, but he couldn’t say a single word; after all, the area below his nose was cut off by the enemy.

Juan began to feel frustrated.

‘Who the hell are they?’

Soon, this question raised another question.

‘And why are they fighting like that?’

In the next moment, Juan was standing before he knew it. He was confused upon realizing that his view had suddenly elevated, but he couldn’t afford to think about it any further; he saw another enemy rushing toward him.

When Juan was about to raise his sword once again, he hesitated when he saw the enemy’s white and plain face. Juan felt his own face without even realizing it.

His face was also plain with no eyes, nose, or mouth.

While Juan was perplexed by the fact that he didn’t have a face either, the enemy instantly struck Juan’s neck and threw him away.

Juan began to ponder.

‘Why was I even born if I was just going to die in vain like this? For what? Did I just come back to life to die once again?’

“No, that’s not true.”

Someone lifted Juan’s head from the ground. Then, they turned Juan’s head and made eye contact with him.

He could see the girl was softly smiling at him.

“Don’t think too much, Juan. Just think about who you are.”

***

“Not bad. You look much better than I expected.”

The girl smiled at Juan upon seeing the way he was dressed.

Aruntal fitted Juan with decent clothes, a sword, and accessories that made him look considerably wealthy. Each of those items were carefully made using magic and focused on practicality rather than style. However, all of it looked quite great in the eyes of the boy and girl who had lived without even proper pieces of clothing.

“I guess the grannies from the group called Aruntal are not swindlers after all. But, for some reason, seeing them work so hard for you is making me feel nervous. So, where are they taking you?” the girl asked.

“They said that for now we will be going around here and there to study.”

Juan unbuttoned his clothes as he didn’t like the tight sleeves. He had only been bearing the uncomfortableness to show his new look to the girl, but he had no reason to keep wearing them since the girl had seen him now.

“And they also told me that I will be fighting some very bad guys. That’s why they are teaching me swordsmanship and magic,” Juan added.

The girl remained silent for a moment as she imagined Juan, who was shorter than herself, fighting against someone. She found it hard to imagine such a ridiculous scene, but the girl had already seen Juan do ridiculous things several times.

“I see. Knowing you, you should be able to do well. You aren’t scared or anything?”

“I don’t know if I’m scared. But..” Juan looked at the girl with eyes filled with hesitation. “..I don’t know when I will be able to come back after I leave this time. It would be nice if you could come with me.”

“Don’t worry about that, Juan. There will always be people who need you everywhere.”

The girl reached out her hand and hugged Juan tightly.

“If Aruntal asks you to fight, and you really do end up encountering things that you think are bad..,” the girl went on in a calm voice. “..then don’t hesitate to destroy them, no matter the means. There are a lot of people in the world who will never learn even if you teach them for years. But Juan, you have to keep this in mind: The world is much weaker than you think. If you squeeze it a little too hard, most of the things will end up breaking.”

“Is that so? What if I accidentally break the people who are not bad?” Juan asked.

“If you do something wrong, you will have to ask for forgiveness. But you won’t make a mistake, Juan. There are far too many bad guys in the world anyway.”

“What if the bad guy is stronger than me?”

“Then run away. It’s not a bad thing to run away when you need to. If you run away and have nowhere to go, then come find me. I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Then what if I can’t run away? What if I have?to fight?”

“Then fight,” the girl hugged Juan and whispered in his ear. “If you have to fight, then go out and fight. If you end up dying, then I promise to give birth to a child and give him the same name as yours. Then, you will be born once again. Wherever you are and whatever you do, I’ll always be there for you. I promise to bring you back to the world.”

Juan was relieved upon hearing the girl’s firm words. Even if he were to run away or end up dying, he had a place to come back. There was someone who believed in him, no matter what. As long as she was alive in the world, anywhere Juan went would be good enough to be a resting place.

Only then was Juan able to leave without any concerns.

But the moment Juan turned around, an endless crowd stood in front of him. All of them were different in shape and size, but all of them had one thing in common—they all had plain white faces.

Juan gasped at the sight. He looked back in a hurry, but the girl was nowhere to be found. All he could see was an infinite battlefield filled with enemies.

Then, the faceless enemies asked Juan a question.

“Who are you?”

“I am.. I am the emperor.”

“That’s nothing more than a title. Didn’t Harmon tell you before that you’re just an extremely strong killer if you’re not wearing a crown?”

“I am.. the god of humans.”

“Are you going to continue to dance to another person’s beat? Until when? Until all the humans end up dead?”

“I am.. I am.. Qzatquizail?”

“That’s just a name and it means nothing. That’s no different from calling yourself a living thing. You idiot, you still don’t even know who you are. The reason why you were brought back to life is neither that you’re the emperor, a god, or Qzatquizail. You weren’t born for the sake of revenge and you weren’t born for the sake of completion. Those who decide what you are were not the Aruntal, nor the people of the empire, and it’s definitely not Gerard Gain either. You are here to repay the faith people had in you. So, let me ask you again. Who are you?”

“I am...”

For a moment, Juan felt a burning thirst and a tearful sadness, making him unable to answer the question.

‘What even is the point of answering this question? Elaine is a person from the distant past, and even Sina, the only one who gave my life value after Elaine, has already died.’

At that moment, the firm foothold beneath him disappeared, and there was only a dark and deep sea left beneath Juan’s feet.

However, at that moment, Juan suddenly felt a stream of flames burning inside the deep sea. It was a terribly small spark that could be extinguished at any moment. Juan realized that this tiny spark had existed since the very beginning and had now finally set off a flame.

This flame was whispering to Juan.

‘Help me, Your Majesty. I find this adversity to be too unbearable.’

“No, it is not the emperor who will save you.”

Juan tightly clenched his teeth and responded to the flame.

“I’m the one who will save you, Sina Solvane. It is I, Juan Calberg!”

***

Suddenly, Juan opened his eyes.

Nienna, Heretia, and the others who were sitting around Juan looked at him with surprised eyes.

Meanwhile, Juan rubbed his eyes and looked around at his surroundings. The rainy season seemed to be over as the sunshine was pouring into the room through the window.

Juan figured that he must have been asleep for quite a while.

“Your Majesty..? Are you awake?”

Nienna was the first person to open her mouth with difficulty. Juan couldn't understand why Nienna was talking to him like that all of a sudden.

Everyone was looking at Juan with a perplexed expression; he looked quite curious.

“Yes. I’m all right.”

Juan answered in a calm voice, then he suddenly closed his mouth. An unfamiliar voice was coming out of his mouth—no, in fact, it was a voice that he was somewhat familiar with until about half a year ago.

Juan looked down at his own hands. His hands were too delicate and small to even hold a sword. When he lifted the blanket, he noticed that his limbs were much shorter and thinner than before.

Juan glared around him with a displeased expression. Only now did he understand why everyone’s expressions looked weird.

“I have once again become young,” Juan muttered lamentably.

Among those standing by his sickbed, Heretia was the only one who had seen Juan when he looked a little younger. But he was now even younger than what he looked like when Heretia first saw him. He looked to be about nine years old, similar to the time when he just left Tantil.

Heretia looked like she was about to burst into laughter at any moment, but the rest of the people looked like they didn’t know what to say.

“It’s probably because my mana level has decreased drastically. It may have been too burdensome to maintain an adult form due to a lack of mana. Let me warn all of you in advance.”

Juan frowned and glared at the others.

“I won’t let anyone laugh or make a stupid joke about me.”

Everyone looked breathless upon hearing such serious remarks being made by a Juan who looked like a nine-year-old.

Eventually, Pavan kicked out the door and a quiet laughter came from outside.

While Juan was determined to kill Pavan with his own hands, Nienna approached Juan with a serious look.

“Dad.”

“Don’t. I don’t know what you want to do, but just don’t.”

“Can I pat you on the head just once?”

Juan thought that such a request was utterly nonsensical. He had a hunch that he would have to allow Heretia to do so as well if he were to allow Nienna.

Juan shook off Nienna’s hand like a sensitive cat as she tried to approach him.

“Now is not the time to do this! We don’t know what Gerard is up to right now even at this very moment!”

When Juan shouted as if he was angry, Nienna stepped back as if she couldn’t help it. She could not start internal strife just to pat Juan on the head at a time like this, especially since the empire could collapse at any moment.

Nienna held back her desires and Juan barely managed to escape the threat.

“How many days have I been asleep for? Any reports about Gerard’s whereabouts?” Juan asked.

“I don’t know what Gerard is up to, but he hasn’t shown any particular movement. Oh, but we did get a message from Opert. It was sent as a ciphertext, but Heretia was able to solve it,” Nienna answered.

“Opert sent a message?” historical

“Yes. It was a message saying that Dane is still alive. Apparently, he is in a city called Riol near the North.”

Juan had used a little trick and let Opert stay inside Aruntal as a spy. Juan couldn’t tell if Opert was able to become a core member of Aruntal, but he figured that Opert had been able to reach a considerably high position.

Juan pondered for a moment and then opened his mouth.

“Sina is alive.”

“What?” Nienna asked back.

“I definitely felt her power—the essence I gave her is still burning.”

Juan didn’t know what had happened, but he had clearly felt that Sina was alive.

Meanwhile, Nienna and Heretia looked at each other with perplexed expressions.

“I see. That’s why..” Nienna murmured.

“What do you mean?” Juan asked.

“Well.. you said something before you woke up, Dad.”

Juan looked at Nienna with anxious eyes.

“What you said was: ’I’m the one who will save you, Sina Solvane. It is..’”

“Stop. I know what I said, so stop.”

Juan laid face down with a painful expression. He even felt the urge to die all over again.

‘I definitely thought of a very important memory, but I didn’t expect to wish to die as soon as I woke up.’

However, Juan had to forget about the painful memories and do what was important. If Sina was alive, he had to go find her. It would be only natural to run into those that were supporting Gerard, since it was Gerard who had taken Sina.

Juan also had to prepare for what Dane might do. Time was scarce and resources were limited.

Then, Juan inadvertently recalled that Anya had not yet arrived before he lost consciousness.

“Come to think of it, what happened to the Order of Huginn? Have they still not arrived?”

“Oh, there was a reason why the Order of Huginn was late. I was going to tell you, but Anya went to grab that thing..”

“That thing? What thing?”

At that moment, the door burst open and Anya appeared. Anya looked at Juan with tearful eyes, and then jumped into the sickbed and hugged Juan.

“Your Majesty! Thank goddess you woke up!”

“Enough..” Juan said.

While Juan was also happy to see Anya again, he did not like this kind of close physical contact.

But Anya only hugged Juan even more tightly while crying loudly.

“I can’t believe that you’ve become so cute once again in the time we haven’t seen each other! This just makes me not want to give you what I have brought!”

“I said enough, Anya. If you say that one more time, I will take back the ring I gave you.”

“Really? Would you still say that after seeing what I have brought?”

Anya pretended to make a sad expression and took something out of the pocket around her waist.

Juan tried to push Anya away, but stopped moving as soon as he saw what Anya had taken out of her pocket.

For a moment, he felt like hugging and kissing Anya no matter what nonsense she said.

“It’s the cloned heart of Mananen McLeir that Captain Ras made!”