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i completely consume her mouth with my own, tasting every inch of her as i push myself inside the sweet opening between her legs. she's warm-so fucking warm-and i stop as her walls clench me. jesus. i shut my eyes briefly and swallow hard. i didn't stop to tease her, i stopped because i'm close to combusting.
"more," she rasps against my lips.
i push further, abandoning her mouth and dropping my forehead against hers. it's going to take a hell of a lot of focus not to let myself go and fuck her into oblivion. olivia's back arches and i grit my teeth. it'd be easier for me not to come if she wasn't so goddamn sexy.
"more," she demands, rocking her hips. "all of you, i want all of you."
how can i ignore such a plea? i stare her dead in the eyes, and even in the extremely dim lighting, i see them flare.
"you want all of me?" i ask.
she nods and i thrust hard. she digs her nails into my hips, pulling me closer, but i stop again and she growls, making me chuckle under my breath. she rolls her hips and i thrust into her again and again. i go harder and harder until i feel her deliciously tight pussy grip me. after that, it doesn't take long for her to completely break apart underneath me, milking me into my own orgasm. i ride it out until my body spasms at the mere touch of her soft walls. my arms tremble and i lower myself, careful not to drop all of my weight onto her smaller frame.
"do you feel better?" she whispers, stifling a yawn and running her fingers up my side.
i kiss her shoulder. "i felt better the second i woke up and heard your voice."
"the dreams will stop once this is all over."
i nod, choosing not to tell her that her words don't sound as convincing as i'm sure she means them to be.
"and no matter which way it goes, you'll always have me."
i lift my head and search for her eyes in the faint light. "that means more to me than anything else."
she kisses me softly, and it's in times like these i'm glad no one else is around. the mere thought of anyone else listening in on our private sappy conversations makes me cringe. whenever darryl speaks to his wife on the phone, he makes no effort to hide his love-struck side and i tease him for it, calling him pussy related names. i know, how contradictory of me. i can't help it. i deflect. it's what i do. if there's one thing olivia has made me see it's how i contradict myself. i told olivia i didn't want to have sex with her... and i had sex with her. i told her that i didn't want a relationship, then i asked her to be my girlfriend, and then i married her. that is c.o.n.t.r.a.d.i.c.t.i.o.n. in its purest form, my friends. since then, i've contradicted myself a million times, i'm aware of that. now, for the easy part. ask me if i care... do i care? no. i don't.
the poets have it right, you know, love makes you do things you swear you'll never do. those sons of bitches need medals or something because i'm living proof of their words.
i roll off olivia and onto my back. instantly, she tucks herself into my side. in all seriousness, i'm glad i contradicted myself. if i didn't, i'd have missed out on olivia. i'd have missed out on the chance to be good.
chapter two
olivia
his hands hit the large gloves in quick patterns and my entire body vibrates, humming with arousal. it's mesmerizing. every retraction and strike captivates me, forbidding me to look away. my lips part as his large, firm arms extend until they're fully straight, showing off all of his delicious ropes of muscle that make up those fucking fantastic limbs. man, if i was given a dollar every time i was rendered useless just by watching him, i'd be a millionaire... and then i'd spend that money on a home gym and watch from the comfort of my own house. that's the life.
"you should take a picture, it lasts longer," seth teases from the cage.
i sigh and watch his thick fingers curl around the wire of the cage. wait, what? i blink quickly and drag my gaze to his. he smiles down at me wickedly, and i feel my cheeks burn. i swallow my embarrassment at being caught staring at him and cover it with a smirk.
"you're too cocky for your own good, you know." i shift my weight onto my right leg and fold my arms. "i was merely watching your technique. you don't seem to punch as hard as you used to."
i'm messing with him. seth is forever trying to impress me, and of course he always does, but i'm in the mood to torment him today. he deserves it. this morning in the shower he said there was a huge spider in the drain. of course there wasn't, but it still made me cry. i should've known he was only messing with me-the whole time he was laughing. seth's smile fades and his brows furrow.
"are you tired?" i ask, pushing further. "did you eat enough for breakfast?"
"i'm fine," he snaps, whirling on his heel and storming back to the center of the ring. he lifts his gloves, bringing them closer to his face. he nods to jackson, who shakes his head at me. i shrug. if jackson can't take one of seth's full power punches, then maybe he shouldn't get into the cage with him. jackson has been nominated as seth's new in-house sparring partner. when seth first started his training camp, the mmac provided him with eight new sparring partners, but seth being seth, refused them all. he doesn't trust the mmac. matt somers has been playing both sides of the field since he announced the third and final fight months ago.
"you really shouldn't have said that." darryl sighs, strolling up beside me.
i fold my arms. "i had to get him to stop looking at me like that somehow."
our conversation ends as seth's gloved fists slam into jackson's wide, black gloves with a loud slap.
slap.
slap, slap.
slap.
slap after slap sounded, making my heart stutter every time, and soon i fell back into 'la la' land, watching my hot-as-hell husband duck and dodge as he throws combos at jackson. seth looks amazing-better than amazing-he looks flawless, more flawless than he ever has-which is an accomplishment all on its own. not everybody can improve upon perfection. his muscles are more prominent, his arms wider, his legs thicker, and his determination stronger than ever before. don russell took from seth and seth doesn't fare well when his things are taken.
darryl exhales and scribbles notes into his green clipboard. "i suppose it wouldn't hurt to push him harder. his times are slacking since his last fight."
"he's having trouble sleeping, too," i confess, glancing briefly at darryl who widens his eyes at me, offended. you'd think he's a best friend i've been keeping secrets from. "it's not his fault."
"yeah, well, he needs to sort his shit out before it gets the best of him. if he loses this fight, his time in the mmac will be over before it even begins."
i nod, watching seth and the way his sweat glistens off his hard torso. we know the repercussions of this final fight... we know the mmac is exploiting the relationship between seth and don for their own monetary gain, but they're also fishing to see who's the better fighter. darryl thinks there are a few people on the mmac board that believe don is a better fighter and would love to see seth be replaced.
"talk to him about it, darryl. you're his coach."
he laughs once. "that means nothing anymore. you're the only one he listens to, and besides, we're the same sex. he'll punch me in the mouth long before he punches you."
i roll my eyes. fantastic.
for forty minutes seth pushes himself harder and harder. the harder he hits, the more frustrated he gets and i wonder if maybe i shouldn't have teased him. i take in his entire form... tall, muscular, and dangerous. he holds a lot of responsibility on his shoulders and i don't care who you are, no one is strong enough to carry the weight of the world.
"time!" darryl shouts, making me jump.
seth lowers his hands, panting heavily. i gulp as he strides across the ring, each step seeming more aggressive than the last. in no time flat, he's leaning against the cage, and though i thought he was angry, he smirks at me. "better?"
i open my mouth to agree, but darryl chimes in over the top.
"better than this morning, but not as good as last month. what's wrong, seth?"
seth's eyes narrow and his lips purse. without a word, he pushes off the cage and storms over to the gate. my entire body tightens with anticipation as he pulls it open and storms down the steps. his dark stare flicks onto my face and i'm trapped-unable to look away. my knees turn buttery the closer he gets and if i focus hard enough, i can hear my hormones multiplying by the second. i catch the corner of my lip between my teeth and thank god humans can't read minds. seth would have me locked up in an insane asylum pronto if he heard half of the crazy, obsessed thoughts i have about him.
"i'm fine," he growls as he passes darryl. "never better."
"you may be, but you're times aren't."
seth snatches my elbow, squeezing tightly as he pulls me away from the cage. i glance over my shoulder at darryl and he closes his clipboard, giving me 'the look.' i know exactly what it means. it's up to me to talk to seth, to motivate him. according to everyone else, i'm the only one he listens to. according to me, he doesn't do anything i say unless i'm begging him to fuck me.
i let seth pull me through the training room without a fight. its set up is state of the art and it's obvious the mmac spares no expense when it comes to their fighters. i've never seen so many machines. seth pulls me all the way into the shower room and finally releases my arms as the door closes behind us. sadly, i'm getting used to the inside of a males only bathroom. the cool, white bricks are cold against my skin as i lean against the wall. i let my head angle lazily to the side as seth pulls his black tank top over his head and tosses it to the floor. his back is to me and my stare automatically sticks to every rise and depression. i know his body so well i can feel it under my fingertips without even touching him.
"maybe darryl is right..." i say, feeling confident now his intense eyes aren't on me.
seth doesn't rush to respond. in fact, he doesn't even look at me. instead, he leans in to turn on the open floor shower. immediately, the hot water begins to steam up the room, feeling heavy in my lungs as it settles. i wait, patiently, for seth to speak to me. two minutes pass and all he's managed to do is hold his hand under the stream of hot water.
"seth-"
he whips around and glares up at me from under his brow, making me gasp. only he has the intensity to make someone gasp aloud.
"you're going to give me a lecture now, too?"
"no, i-"
he starts forward, his aggressive and predatory steps swallowing the distance between us and forcing me to swallow my words. i brace myself against the wall, expecting some kind of show of dominance, instead he stops three feet away. strangely, i feel cold... i want his warm body on mine.
unable to resist his pull, i inch closer. "i'm not trying to lecture you... i just want to help-"
"i don't need help," he snaps at me and i back up an inch. "i'm fine going at my own pace."
i frown. "and when don beats you?"
he jolts forward, pushing me hard against the wall. there's the show of dominance i was expecting. i don't falter, not because i'm not scared-no, i'm scared-i'm fucking terrified. i don't falter because i know it upsets him when i let him get to me. his chest is flush against mine and his thigh forces itself between my legs. i'm pinned-completely immobilized.
"you think he'll beat me?" seth growls and i rapidly shake my head.
his breath is warm and quick on my face and i want nothing more than to back down, but i have to be the one to tell him to go hard. no one else has the balls to, and besides, he needs to hear it anyway. i've lost count of his sleepless nights and can no longer calculate his fluctuating moods. he's unpredictable-even more so than before-and for the first time since we started dating, i don't know how to read him.
"i think you'll let him."
he leans even closer, stealing my breath from me. "if you can look me in the eye and tell me that you honestly think i'm not working hard enough, then i'll push myself harder, just like i did today."
i rake my teeth over my bottom lip. i think seth's doing all right, but i'm not the one who studies him and takes the notes.
"i think you need to try harder, not for me or darryl, but for yourself. you didn't take it so well when you lost to don last time." i allow my fingers to graze his hard sides. "i don't want to see it happen again."
"it won't happen again," he states, harshly, and this time, i flinch.
i'm not trying to fight him... i don't ever want to intentionally upset him, but sometimes things need to be said. how he wants to take it is up to him. my intentions have never been anything other than wanting to help him. he exhales, leaning his forehead against mine. the previously tense muscles of his arms relax, and he lets them fall from their defensive position on the wall before gently stroking my cheek.
"mentally, i'm exhausted and i need to sort it out before i start pushing my body to its limit. i can't be both mentally and physically exhausted, o-it's not good for anyone."
i nod, caressing him. that's understandable. i catch his hand on my cheek and pull it over to my mouth. his eyes flutter shut briefly as i kiss the palm of his hand. it smells and tastes like sweat and rubber, but i don't mind.