"approved what?"

"your lab, silly!"

his eyes narrowed, his brows forming two lines in the middle, just like david when he was utterly confused. "when?"

"i talked to him on the phone this morning, then i went to see walt to get the budget plan. jase, you have the full backing of the house, and an unlimited budget."

he laughed. "really?"

"mm-hm."

"ara, that's. . ." he scratched his head, still looking a little mixed by his emotions. "that's great!"

"i know, right?" i tapped his arm once. "there's a condition, though."

"what's that?"

"i have to have a guard present whenever we're researching or training."

"that's-" he nodded, smiling. "yeah, that's more than fine. more than fine."

"i knew you'd say that." i clapped once, bouncing on my toes. "we have to celebrate."

he grinned. "and i know just the place to go."

"out on the town?" i joked.

"better." he patted my arm as he walked past. "have everyone meet at the lighthouse tonight."

"ooh, lighthouse party."

"yeah." he walked backward, the reality clearly having sunken in to his smile. "it's a tradition around these parts."

"to celebrate on a lighthouse?"

"yeah." he started up the stairs. "and tell blade he better be there."

"i will." i watched him disappear into the second floor corridor, then turned to look back at falcon, who was standing inconspicuously in the shadows nearby. "you coming, fal?"

he stepped forward, his hands clasped in front. "you'll understand if i don't."

"so, you don't approve."

"i can't say i do."

"of what? the lab or the party?"

he cleared his throat. "blade's in the library, preparing for your lesson on royal popularity, if you're looking for him."

"right." i nodded once. "i get it. you don't approve of either."

"only because both situations put you in position to end up in trouble."

"blade will be there tonight, and you'll be there at every training session."

"i wish i could say that gives me comfort."

"well-" i turned away. "it's too bad, falcon. if david agrees, you can bloody-well get over it."

"yes, your majesty," he said resolutely, following me up the stairs.

i wished i could tell him to go away. he'd made me mad now, and i really didn't even want to be in the same space as him. in my old life, i could've stormed off and slammed my bedroom door, but this version of me had to wear any disdain under her sleeve and express only composure. it sucked.

"i'm sorry, ara."

i stopped and angled my neck slowly to see falcon. he'd stopped about six paces behind me, hanging his head. "what for?"

"you have every right to celebrate this. what happened at training the other day was spectacular, and if it weren't for jason, it wouldn't have happened."

i walked down a few steps and stood on the one just above him so we were almost the same height. "look, i respect you, falcon. a lot. and i. . ." i thought about it for a second. "your support would mean a lot to me, you know."

he looked up, his face swapping the sternness for a smile. "i support the result. just not so much the process."

"then you'll come to the party tonight?"

he laughed. "i can't say i'll go that far, but i won't stop you from going."

"well, i didn't think you would."

he wet his lips, nodding. "i was planning to."

"what?"

"come on." he walked ahead of me. "let's go find blade and tell him the good news."

"i can't believe you were going to stop me."

"hang on." he cordoned me off from the last step with the back of his forearm.

i stopped abruptly against his sleeve. "why are we hanging on?"

"em and mike are in there." he nodded to the great hall.

"so?"

"so, they're arguing."

"are we listening in?" i asked with a laugh.

"no." he lowered his arm. "we're respectfully not trespassing."

"but we're going to the library."

"and if we walk past now, they might think we heard them."

"so what if we do? they should take their business somewhere private." i shoved past falcon and nearly tumbled backward down the step as emily flew past us suddenly, her face in her hands. "em?" i called, but she evaporated.

"you okay?" falcon asked.

"yeah." i let go of the railing and dusted myself off. "she was in a real hurry."

falcon looked over his shoulder. "trouble in paradise."

"so it would seem." i considered the doors to the great hall for a second. "i'm gonna go see if mike's okay."

falcon nodded once and fell back into guard mode behind me.

the lone figure sitting at the right hand of the king's chair didn't notice falcon and i on the balcony above him. his head was in his hands, his troubles somewhere on the ground between his feet.

i tiptoed down the curvy staircase, my hand tracing the railing and, once at the bottom, appeared at vamp speed beside him. "mike?"

he lifted his head and our eyes met. i expected to see tears, but he just looked worn. "hey, ara."

"what just happened? emily all but caused a tornado on her way outta here."

he sighed and his brow landed against his thumb, his elbow on his knee. "i can't do it anymore."

"do what?"

"this business with emily." he sat tall again. "ever since she left university and moved here, she's been really needy and whiney. i just. . ."

"she's probably just bored. i'll assign her a task other than council member. maybe she-"

"she gave me back the ring."

"what?" i screeched.

"she gave it back to me-last night. she just walked up and said she was done, that she didn't want to get married anymore."

"oh, mike." i sat down in david's chair.

"it's okay." mike spun around to face me, tucking his legs under the table. "i mean, she took it back this morning-she was over it, you know, whatever made her break up with me. but-"

"but?"

"but i didn't want her to take it back."

"why?" i reached out and wound my fingers in the ball of his fist.

"i'm exhausted, to be honest, ara. and i think maybe i jumped into a relationship too soon after we broke it off. i just-" he leaned back in the chair and looked up at the roof. "i just need some time to clear my head."

i nodded. "she'll understand."

"well, she didn't." he presented the room, aiming his hand off to the path emily had taken in haste. "she ditched the ring at my head."

i tried not to laugh. "she did?"

"yeah." he looked around the floor for a second. "i don't even know where it landed. for all i know, with a throw like that, it went through twenty-odd walls and ended up in the library."

i laughed then. so much for sensitivity. "we'll find it."

"i know." he nodded. "but she's not getting it back this time, ara. i'm done."

"you're ending it?"

"no." he stood up. "she ended it."

"mike?" i started, but he walked from the room, and i just watched, deciding then that inviting him to our lighthouse celebration was a bad idea, especially considering how much he hated jason. "this party is getting smaller and smaller," i said to falcon.

"i'm sure emily will go."

i looked up to where he stood on the balcony of the second floor. "can you go ask her?"

"of course." he bowed and turned away.

nate headed out of the library as i waltzed in, and he flashed a quick grin, holding up the latest book he borrowed, then hurried off before i could ask him about the party. i knew he'd come, though, without question.

"blade," i called into the open space, searching up, down, and around with my entire body. the curtains were drawn across the great windows, the room dark and empty. i noticed the projector set up on a table across from a whiteboard, and a stack of notes beside it, but blade was nowhere to be seen. "blade? you here?"

"hey, ara."

my eyes moved quickly to the bookcases under the balcony, landing on a hunched figure in the armchair. it was so dark that if he hadn't spoken, even my vampire night vision wouldn't have noticed him. "why are we sitting in the dark?" i asked, wandering over.

he smiled up at me where i sat on the arm of the chair. "you spoken to em today?"

"no, but i heard about her and mike."

he stood up, the leather squeaking behind him. "she loves him, you know?"

"i know."

"why doesn't he get it? it's so simple." he stopped with both hands propping him up against the oak table. "she just wants his affection, his love, maybe a little attention. it's like he doesn't want her, ara, like he keeps her all to himself because he wants to prove he's really gotten over you."

"he has." i stood, too. "emily's not his trophy girlfriend, blade. he loves her."

"not enough. not enough to have asked her to marry him."

"why so sensitive about this?"

"she's my friend, ara. i care about her."

i laughed in the back of my throat. "does . . . does she know you're all cut up about this?"

he dropped his hand from his head and looked at me disapprovingly. "i'm not all cut up."

i smiled, and it made him smile, too. "then why can't i feel the pulse of our bind-your never-ending-curse-of-lilith-love that you've had for me all these months?" i teased.

"shut up," he said with a grin and sat down on the chair. "oh god. why can't i fall for someone who isn't taken by a high-ranking member of my new society?"

i laughed and sat down beside him. "now, what fun would that be?"

he bumped me softly with his elbow. "well, all jokes aside, and no disrespect but, i'm glad i don't love you anymore."