at i say is true. i am your lifemate; there cannot be untruth between us."

desari found one button on his immaculate shirt and twisted it nervously. "it was not as if i believed you lied. the things you believed - i did not doubt you thought them true. but it all seemed so unreal, like a fantasy, a dream. how could mere words bind us together for all eternity? how could one male have the power to so change a female's life?"

"we are connected from birth, cara, " he explained, moving his body closer when he felt a shiver run through her. "two halves of the same whole. there is only one true lifemate. i am fortunate that mine is so talented and beautiful. it is unfortunate, however," he added, "that you are so willful and have no knowledge of what is expected of you."

desari leapt away from him, clearing the picnic table in a single bound. she looked wild and untamed, a sexy enchantress capable of taking his very breath away.

"you think me willful because i insist on taking control of my own destiny? do not talk to me of this lifemate thing. it means nothing to me. nothing at all. you breeze into my life, do something to tie us together, and then feel you have the right to dictate how i should live?"

julian watched the expressions chasing across her beautiful, furious face. everything about her was a miracle to him. how small and delicate her bones seemed to be. the sheen and mass of her silken hair was so luxurious he could lose himself in it. "i am of the old world, a male carpathian. i did not take into account that you would not know the ways of our people."

"is that supposed to be an apology of some kind?" desari folded her arms across her body, shivering as if cold. "i do not care about the ways of your people."

"our people," he corrected gently.

"my people are the ones i live with, share my life with. for instance, my brother, the one you tried to kill."

"if i had tried to kill him, cara mia, he would be dead." he raised a hand to prevent her indignant interruption. "i am not saying he would not have taken me with him; he very likely would have. but he was not really trying to kill me either. it was more a matter of being sure. darius was not going to turn his beloved sister over to a stranger who was unable to protect her. it was a test."

"darius was testing you?" she repeated slowly. "this is some kind of male thing i should understand? approve of?"

julian moved so quickly he was on her before she had time to run. he never gave a warning, never twitched a muscle. he simply was there, his body crowding aggressively close, his hand spanning her throat, his thumb feathering back and forth along her delicate jaw. "desari, cara, we have no choice but to learn each other's ways. we are bound together. i would like to be able to say the pretty words you want to hear. that i was wrong to force your obedience - "

"tried to force," she corrected with a flash of her eyes.

julian bent to brush his lips across the tempting satin of her forehead as amusement crept into the deep gold of his eyes. "tried to force. that is true. i am fortunate that my lifemate is so powerful. still, piccola, i was well within my rights to see to your safety. i can do no other than ensure your well-being. our people cannot afford to lose even one woman, desari. the total extinction of our race is nearly complete. our women are our only hope. i will admit that i do not always follow the laws of our people, but in this i have no choice, and neither do you. your safety and health must be placed above all else. the other woman you have traveling with you must be guarded as well."

she swept a hand through her hair. "are we meant only to provide children for our race, then? that is the sole reason for our existence?"

"no, cara, your existence is to bring joy to this world, as you have done for so many centuries. god would not have graced you with such a voice, such a powerful tool for peace, had he not meant for you to use it. but" - julian shrugged his broad shoulders, his thumb tracing a pattern along her neck - "in time, that would be the hope, yes, that you and i would provide our race with more female children. i am uncertain what kind of a father i would make, as i never imagined myself in such a role, but i never thought i would find or be a lifemate either."

something close to humor flickered for a moment in her eyes. "i cannot say you are a total success in that area." but his praise of her talents had warmed her, as had the drawling caress in his voice, the admiration in the depths of his eyes, the depths of his mind.

his hand found the nape of her neck and drew her inexorably to him as he bent his head to hers. his mouth descended with infinite slowness, then fastened to hers so that he could taste her sweetness. she felt her heart leap at his touch, and her body went into instant melt down. she felt his great strength, the desire surging through him as the heat arced between them. his mouth moved to tease the corner of hers, to blaze a trail of fire along her jaw, her chin.

"i am, however, quite good at one or two other things," he murmured with casual confidence. his teeth nibbled at her chin.

"is this supposed to get you out of trouble?" she asked it with her eyes closed, savoring the touch and feel of him. all at once it seemed imperative that they be alone.

"i should not be in trouble. i am as new at this as you are, desari. up until now i have spent my life entirely alone." his lips skimmed the silken column of her neck. "trying to fit into this situation is as alien for me as it is for you. if your need is to be with this family unit, then i can do no other than be here with you. but you must recognize that i have needs also. i do not wish to find other males near you, nor do i want you to question my judgment when your safety is in jeopardy."

when she would have protested, he gave her a little shake. "think what you say before you speak. i am in your mind. i know you do not want another authority telling you what to do with your life. i, better than most, understand this in you. but you would obey your brother in matters of safety. the same responsibility he accepted for your security is now mine. i require the same trust and loyalty that you have always given to him."

"trust is earned, julian," desari pointed out softly. "and it goes both ways. my brother does not arbitrarily dictate to me what i can and cannot do. but i am in your mind. i feel the sometimes violent emotions you are contending with, your intense dislike of other males close to me. you do not even want me to feed."

he felt the words like a stab to his gut. every muscle clenched in protest as a vivid picture sprang into his mind. desari luring a male to her with her beauty and mystery, bending close to him so that their bodies touched, so that her lips could drift along the male's neck to find the pulse beating there. rage exploded in him, deep, nearly uncontrollable, certainly like nothing he had ever experienced before. it was wild and untamed, a berserker's rage.

julian shook his head. it was illogical to feel such an intense emotion over something as natural as feeding. nothing in his centuries of living had prepared him for such a thing. he didn't understand it. "you will not feed from any other than me," he declared, unable to stop himself from so commanding her.

desari was watching him closely, monitoring his thoughts. julian made no attempt to censor anything from her. he wanted total truth between them. it was not her fault that he was experiencing difficulties he hadn't been prepared for, nor did he want her to think so. her soft mouth suddenly curved into a smile. "you are right, julian, i will not. i have no wish to get so close to another male." her fingertips brushed his jaw, her first real show of affection toward him without his prompting. "it will be no hardship to allow you to provide for me if that is what you need."

his relief was tremendous, the curious somersaulting in the region of his heart unexpected. "i will do my best to come to some kind of compromise over your family unit and your need to sing. it is a great gift, desari, your voice and what you are able to do with it. i feel pride in your accomplishments, but i cannot lie. i fear for your safety. your schedules are announced far in advance. i believe you will be safe from the human assassins for now, but we must explore the very real possibility that vampires are congregating in this region with the express hope of finding you and the other female."

now more than ever it was imperative he succeed in his centuries-old quest to destroy his vampire mentor, or she would never be truly safe again. the ancient could so easily track her now through julian.

desari winced at his last remark. "the 'other female' is syndil. i love her as my sister. you have access to my memories. you can see that. you can also see why we are especially protective of her and why she chooses to take the leopard's form at this time."

"while she is in the leopard's form she does not have to cope with her trauma," julian mused, "but you must see, desari, that it is not right. it only prolongs her recovery. all of you think you are helping her, but she needs to be strong on her own. she can cope. pretending the assault did not happen will not allow her to recover. she needs to be encouraged to start taking back command of her life."

desari tilted her head to look up at him, astonished at his perception. "how could you know this when you have not even met her? why did we not realize we were only lengthening her recovery?" desari's anguish throbbed in her musical voice. "it was my negligence that this has not been attended to."

julian smiled down at her. "you take far too much on your shoulders, desari. all of you tried to shield her. i am certain in the beginning it was exactly what she needed. now that has changed. sharing your mind yet seeing things from a fresh perspective allows me to show you the conclusion you yourself would have come to in time."

desari moved restlessly, wanting the warmth and comfort of his larger frame. julian responded immediately by pulling her close to him. his strong arms en folded her and held her tightly against him. "it will be all right, desari. i promise you."

"darius has told dayan you are to be treated with respect," she whispered into his chest.

julian shrugged carelessly before he could stop himself. he did not seek approval or protection from anyone.