"you are mistaken, angel. throughout history many of my kind have needed to be just such a being. it is not easy, and the toll on our souls is tremendous, but we have accepted the responsibility in order to protect both our people and humankind. i am what i am, and i cannot change what went before or what is now. when anyone threatens our way of existence, we do our best to remove their memories without violence, but should the need arise, we have no choice but to fight back. we also have the right to walk this earth. the same being created us in the same likeness. we were given many challenges and trials, and we have accepted them."

"what if someone completely innocent discovers your existence, and you can't erase their memory? do you believe you have a right to take that life?"

a small smile touched the corners of his mouth. "in all the centuries of my existence, such a thing has never happened. if a being discovered us and could not be controlled, i would imagine a good reason existed for such a phenomenon. i would do much investigative work into the matter. i could not render a judgment at this time without much more information."

"how terribly convenient for you." she found herself following his tall figure back down the stairs to the lower story.

his black gaze swept over her, in no way perturbed. "sarcasm does not suit you all that well, angel. i must admit i have a weakness for your sassy mouth, but sarcasm over so great an issue is beneath you."

she flushed. it was unfair of her to be so judgmental. in her line of work it was easy enough to be put in a position of having to shoot or not shoot in the blink of an eye. in a way, that could render her judge, jury, and executioner, too. she had never had to face a decision like that, but she knew a couple of officers who had chased a suspect, had the suspect turn with something shiny in his hand, and had made the decision to fire. neither officer had been able to accept that they had shot an unarmed teenager. one committed suicide, and the other quit the force and still battled with nightmares and alcoholism. how would she have handled a life filled with such dark decisions? her mind shied away from the question.

"i'm sorry, lucian. you're right. i'm glad i'm not you and i've never had to live your life or make your decisions. mine have been difficult enough." she rested a hand on his arm. "really, i mean it."

"you do not have to apologize to me, jaxon. we are making tough decisions very quickly that affect more than just our lives. i know this is difficult for you, and, after all, you still do not know me so very well."

only some time later did jaxon realize that lucian had not given her any of the information she had requested. she still had no idea why the three men had invaded their home or what they wanted. or what lucian had really done to handle the situation.

lucian took care of the wolves first, helping antonio crate them and ready them for travel. with his calming touch, the wolves were quite willing to take a trip back to the wilderness, into the canadian forests. lucian appeared unhurried as he carefully prepared each animal, paying special attention to the alpha pair. he looked deep into their eyes, exchanging something wild and primitive jaxon was certain she would never understand but thought extremely beautiful. tears formed in her eyes as she watched how gentle he was with the animals. lucian continually astounded her.

as they watched the truck pull away from the estate, jaxon reached for his hand, experiencing a sense of sadness watching the creatures go. they belonged with lucian. wild and untamed. "you wouldn't have to send them away from you if you weren't with me."

at once lucian's entire attention centered on her. he bent his dark hair over her blond, one arm curving around her small waist. "you are my life, the only one who matters to me. i can live without the wolves. i can live without my people and outside my homeland, but i cannot live without you. this was our decision together. we are not leaving our home for all time, rather taking a small working vacation. the wolves would be uneasy outside their natural environment without me. if someone else should try to poison them and i was not here to advise them properly, some of the young ones might eat the tainted meat."

her dark brown gaze moved over his face. "those men fed the wolves poison?"

he tugged at her hand to get her walking beside him toward the long white limousine. "actually, yes, they did."

antonio handed her into the car. she smiled up at him rather absently, turning over the information in her mind. "and you let them go? that doesn't sound like you. where are we going? we aren't taking this monstrosity wherever we're going, are we? i own a little car. it gets great mileage," she added hopefully.

lucian leaned toward her and whispered softly in her ear. "we do not need a car when we leave, angel. we are simply drawing attention to ourselves for the moment."

a small smile found its way to her mouth. "this car definitely draws attention."

"is that not the idea? tyler drake will know we are leaving. that is imperative. and the undead must be aware of our every move."

"but are we actually taking this limo all the way to our destination, which, by the way, i haven't been told? do you even know it for certain?"

the car was moving with silent swiftness through the streets toward the police station. "i own property up on the border between washington and canada. we will be able to set up housekeeping there with no problem."

jaxon shook her head but refrained from pointing out that she had misgivings about being in the wilderness with tyler drake hunting them. they had already discussed it. she knew lucian believed drake would be easily handled, but he didn't realize the extent of drake's training. tyler drake was human, but he was an extraordinary human. and the only thing that now mattered to drake was likely killing lucian. it would be impossible in hand-to-hand combat, but not from a distance. she believed drake capable of killing from a very long distance - much longer than lucian might suppose. drake was an excellent shot and equally adept at making remote-controlled bombs.

jaxon turned her face away from lucian to stare out the window at the passing streets. even in the night the sidewalks were alive with people. she was familiar with the patterns of their lives. the ebb and flow of crime according to time, weather, and month had always been her focus, her life. now she felt out of sync with that world she had known. she could hear things she had never heard before, a barrage of sounds from insect chirps to whispered conversations. sometimes the assault on her ears was almost more than she could bear before she remembered how to turn down the volume. she was aware of things she had never noticed before. textures. colors. little everyday things like the brush of hair against her cheek. hearts beating. the rush of blood in veins. the bark on trees. the way the wind blew through foliage.

there was a growing restlessness in her that she had never experienced. a wild, untamed spirit that seemed to be spreading, demanding more from her, demanding things she had no knowledge of. she had known the night as a time when many crimes occurred under the cover of darkness, yet now it called to her seductively, whispered to her continually.

embrace me. embrace me.

she belonged in the night. it enfolded her within its darkness as in the softest of blankets. the stars overhead were like glittering diamonds, a kaleidoscope of amazing beauty.

the car pulled into the police station parking lot, and antonio courteously opened the door for them. feeling embarrassed and hoping none of her friends would see her, jaxon hastily slid out of the limo.

lucian caught her hand, preventing her from surging ahead of him. "follow my lead, angel. this is where we spread rumors so that those we want to trail us will do so."

she nodded and walked with him into the station. as always, lucian commanded immediate attention. she didn't think he was manipulating anyone; it was simply the way he carried himself. tall and straight with complete confidence. dark and dangerous. mysterious. old world. gothic, even. a dark lord or prince. he automatically commanded respect. even the captain came out of his office immediately, hand extended. to lucian. not to her. she shook her head and allowed the conversation to flow around her. she even spaced out a bit until she heard the word marriage. at once she blinked to bring the two men into focus.

to her horror, lucian was telling captain smith that they had married quietly and he was now taking her away. he admitted they were hoping drake would follow them and thus any copycats would be headed off before they could strike. the official version would be that they had gone off for a secluded honeymoon. the captain was to drop it around the station house that they had headed to lucian's hideaway along the border. the captain actually hugged her while he murmured his congratulations and admonishments to be careful. jaxon had the odd feeling she was living in a fantasy world, a dorothy in oz effect.

we aren't married.

she said it firmly because it was the one thing she knew absolutely to be true.

of course we are. what do you thinklifemates are?

he refuted her testimony with the causal finesse of a swordsman.

we aren't married, she repeated stubbornly. this time she flashed him a warning with her dark eyes.

he grinned at her, a mischievous, little-boy, all-too-sexy grin that instantly melted her heart.

i recall the ritual ceremony in vivid detail. if you do not, i will be happy to repeat it. the ritual is binding in every way.

she lifted her chin at him as they reentered the limousine. "for you, maybe, but i'm human, remember? i get married. that's the way we do things."

"you wish, maybe, but reality is an altogether different thing." he sounded very male, very smug.

jaxon sat beside him in silence, smoldering. it wasn't that she was angling for a wedding ring. or a wedding. it was the idea that he was always right that was so galling.

thought, she reminded herself. he thought he was always right. officially, they were not married, so that made her technically right. she relaxed, feeling rather smug herself. let him think she was wrong.

you are very much married to me, jaxon. make no mistake about it.

a little thread of iron ran through the soft velvet of his voice, as if he thought she was considering jumping ship and hotfooting it away from him.

deliberately jaxon shrugged carelessly. "think whatever you like, lucian. obviously we aren't going to come to any agreement on this issue. what are we doing now?"

"we are ensuring we have made enough of a spectacle of ourselves that everyone in town has seen us or heard of our departure. and because you are so adamant, we will leave a paper trail as well."

"what does that mean?" she was suddenly suspicious of his soft, melting voice. he sounded too pure and beautiful. he just had to be up to no good.

"carpathians leave as few paper trails behind as possible. things like passports have a way of turning up as incriminating evidence a few hundred years later. now, with computers, it is even easier to find oneself trapped in a maze of paperwork. we do not like to create documents unless they are for property or money or businesses we continually leave to ourselves upon our timely 'deaths.' it is one of the reasons we travel often from continent to continent if we are not in our homeland. people find it impossible to identify us as other than our own sires, perhaps, fifty or sixty years later."

she laughed softly. "i guess i deserved that answer. i just had to ask. what are you doing now?"

"marrying you in the way of your people. there is a man who can do so, a judge i know, and he will arrange the necessary paperwork. money and influence work wonders even at this time of night. of course he will be understanding, with so many crimes happening so quickly around us. the news can be leaked to the papers tomorrow, which will further our cause."

her eyelashes swept down to conceal her expression. "i hope you're kidding."

the long white limousine was already parked at the curb as if antonio had received his orders and was waiting. she sat back against the leather seat, her face hidden in the shadows. lucian touched her cheek with gentle fingertips. "this ceremony means much to you." he made it a statement.

"not really." jaxon tried to be as casual as he had been. so what if, like nearly every girl in the world, she'd dreamed of a white wedding dress and a church filled with family and friends? her family was dead, and most of her friends were going that way also. any guests attending her wedding would be taking their lives in their hands, just as the man who performed the ceremony would be. she was already shaking her head. "i don't want to do this. drake would retaliate before he followed us."

lucian studied her averted profile for a moment before nodding his agreement. at once the car slid back into traffic and headed for their home. she was correct. tyler drake would indeed perceive anyone who helped with their marriage ceremony as a threat to his fantasy world. lucian let his breath out slowly.

there were many things in jaxon's memories he didn't fully understand. a human ceremony to him did not have the same beauty and completeness about it that the carpathian one held, yet he could not put her longing out of his mind. someday, he vowed, she would have her ceremony in a church, surrounded by friends and family, just like the picture he had caught in her mind. for now, all he could do was pull her close to his warmth and hold her in his arms.

in their house he left behind a rough, partial map of his property deep within the cascade mountains, along with three black-and-white photographs of the old ornate hunting lodge he had purchased. prominently displayed was a note written in his flourishing handwriting. an analyst would have said it was old world, bold, and the writer a dominating male with complete confidence in himself. the note was allegedly to antonio, detailing instructions on the care and management of the estate in lucian's absence. antonio was quite familiar with his instructions.

lucian caught jaxon's hand and led her to the privacy of the enclosed backyard. "are you ready? we must leave soon if we intend to travel this night."

her eyes were suddenly wary. she had been far too quiet during his preparations, not once asking him anything. her silence worried him far more than her questions would have.

"i don't know why, lucian, but i'm getting the distinct impression we aren't taking the limousine after all."

"no, we travel much faster and more safely on our own. antonio will pull the car out of the driveway and head toward the airport while we take off."

"and we're going to..." she trailed off, looking at him expectantly. "fly." he said it softly.

jaxon swallowed the lump that was suddenly blocking her throat. somehow she had known. somewhere along the line she had realized they wouldn't be boarding an airplane or driving through the state in the white limousine. she wasn't certain what had tipped her off; perhaps simply being able to read lucian's mind. maybe she was sharing his mind more often than she was aware.

she realized she was twisting her fingers together nervously and immediately put both hands behind her back. he thought she could do this. he expected her to do it. he was treating the idea of flying as an everyday occurrence. "like superman?" her attempt at a smile fell flat.

"not exactly. clouds are moving in - a perfect cover. i will help you dissolve into mist, and we'll use the drafts to move through the air."

her heart slammed hard in her chest. her teeth bit more deeply into her lower lip. "mist sounds a bit difficult to start with. why don't we try something easier?"

"such as?" lucian prompted gently.

"we can use our feet. you know, just start walking down the highway and stick our thumbs out." again she attempted a smile. but the rapid beating of her heart betrayed her.

"look at me, angel." he turned the full force of his black eyes on her. "you trust me. you know you do. i would never ask you to do anything you could not do. you are very capable of doing this."

she was nodding, aware he was right, but at the same time, the thought of her body dissolving into drops of mist was terrifying. "couldn't i try something else first? something easier?" her fingers twisted together nervously, but she stood resolutely.

lucian hesitated. mist would be easy to move quickly through time and space, streamlined, fast, unseen by even the undead in the dark of night. "mist takes the same amount of energy to create as shape-shifting into owls or birds of prey with tremendous wingspans. it is essentially the same."

"how can our bodies be squeezed into the tiny little body of a bird?" her voice was trembling. she heard it but could do nothing about it. no matter how much she wanted to accept this, she was finding the idea terrifying.

lucian swept his arms around her. "i can help you, jaxon. will you trust me to do that for you? i can make the acceptance easier."

her first reaction was to shake her head firmly, her teeth grinding so hard on her lip that a small bead of blood appeared. the idea of someone else controlling her was not to her liking, but when she made herself take a breath, she felt differently. this was a part of her life now. like it or not, she was no longer human. she was carpathian. there was no going back, only going forward. she had to learn to do this somehow. and she was not going to be able to control every situation.

lucian watched as she gnawed nervously at her lower lip. the sight was enough to tear at his heartstrings. his palm slid around the nape of her neck, his fingers sliding over her skin, her pulse. of their own accord his fingertips stroked her blond hair soothingly. he bent his head to hers, his mouth finding hers with ease, his tongue swirling a healing agent over her full lower lip even as he took the essence of her blood into his body.

"just to help me, to calm me down," jaxon said softly. "i don't want you to take over my mind entirely."

his hand moved lovingly over her face. taking over was a temptation. it wasn't that he begrudged the time. he had used up a good portion of the night getting the wolves ready for transport, preparing them for the disturbing separation the pack would have to endure. he would spend every minute of this night allowing jaxon as much time as she needed to accept what must be done. to accept the tremendous gifts she had inherited. still, he was tempted to take control of her mind, to eliminate her fears, so that she would cease to suffer so needlessly. he really had trouble bearing her pain.

as if she was touching his mind and reading his thoughts, she forced a small smile. "i can do this. i know i can. if i do it this time with your help, i know i can do it by myself the next time. it would have come in handy when i was facing that ghoul at the police station. i could have just evaporated."

"you will feel an incredible sense of freedom, jaxon," he said softly, and he merged his mind fully with hers. at once his calmness was hers, his tranquil mind centering hers. he built a picture in her head, in his.

jaxon felt her body begin to fade - well, not fade exactly, but begin to become light and airy. she wanted to grab his hand and hold on tightly. he was an anchor in her mind, and, immediately, as her terror began to rise, she felt the warmth and strength of his arms creeping around her. except there was no jaxon anymore. she was vapor, a colorful mist like rainbow prisms. droplets in the air. surrounding her was lucian. not flesh and blood, bone and sinew, but diamond-like specks moving swiftly to protect her as they began to move through the sky.

it was unexpectedly exhilarating. terrifying but exhilarating. they streaked skyward, right up toward the clouds. jaxon had never experienced anything even close to the feeling. power flowed through her and out into the night sky.

she was aware of the sights below her, although not in the same sense as seeing them through her own eyes. rather, she was seeing them through lucian as they streaked through the sky. they were moving far too fast and she was too inexperienced to be able to focus on any one thing below them. each time she became at all distracted, lucian's mind centered her, holding the picture of mist uppermost in her mind. it was easy for him, second nature, so much so that he was no more aware of the mechanics of shape-shifting than of walking. for jaxon it was an energy-draining yet wild ride.

by the time lucian called a halt, jaxon was so exhausted she was barely able to resume her own form. she was swaying, her skin so pale it was nearly translucent. without lucian to hold her up, she would have simply collapsed onto the ground. she had no idea where she was, and she really didn't care. all around her was forest, thick stands of trees and dark, lush vegetation. they were in a mountainous area, steep and wild. the wind was blowing fiercely through the branches and leaves, creating a whistling that sounded curiously like a moan.

jaxon felt light, almost insubstantial, in lucian's arms. he eased her down to the ground so she could rest her back against a broad tree trunk. "you did exactly right, my love. shape-shifting is not nearly as alarming as it first appeared, is it?"

clasping her knees, she shook her head, dizzy and swaying, her head almost too heavy to hold up. she was hungry; hunger beat in her like her a pulse, like her heart. it pounded in her ears, throbbed in her veins. it was a sickness consuming her. she could hear lucian's heart beating strongly, beckoning her. the ebb and flow of blood moving through him, his life force like the sap moving through the trees. she could smell his scent calling to her, his very essence beckoning her. she felt the heat of his skin radiating outward toward her, surrounding her like a silken web. she needed the feel of him, strong and powerful, holding her close to him.

lucian bent to her. the sound of the blood rushing through his veins, bursting with hot, sweet life, tormented her. without looking up at him, jaxon pushed at his chest with the palm of one hand. she didn't want him to see the loathing of her own need in her eyes. it was just that she was so weak, so drained of energy. she had never felt as tired and insubstantial before. she could get her craving under control if he just would move away from her and give her space.

what you are feeling is very normal, little love. you need to feed.

his voice brushed at her, soft, seductive, deliberately intimate.

i know exactly what is wrong, lucian. to you it's perfectly normal. to me it's abhorrent.

she was too tired to speak aloud, to fight for her humanity.

i want to sleep for a while. can we just find a place for tonight?

lucian straightened slowly. he knew they were being tracked. the one following them was a distance away, careful to keep from putting himself in lucian's path. lucian felt a strange blankness in two areas several miles from them. only those of power could manage such a thing. when a carpathian scanned a region for life-forms, very few could successfully hide their presence. lucian was an ancient. he was sensitive enough that he could feel the absence of life as clearly as he could feel life itself.

"listen to me, honey," he said very softly, his voice so gentle and tender her heart fluttered. "our plan is working very well. to the north and west of us, two lesser vampires are tracking us across the country. another, much more powerful being is following, also. i can detect the taint of him but cannot find his exact location without going out to face all three of them."

jaxon raised her head and looked up at him with her large eyes. she was so tired, she had to reach for her voice. "not alone, you're not. if you go, i go. come on then, lucian. do your mind-control thing. it's the only way i'm going to be able to eat. or feed, or whatever disgusting way you say it." there was resolve on her face, in the depths of her eyes.

lucian immediately felt an answering response in the region of his heart. she was totally exhausted and overwhelmed by all the new things she was having to face, yet she rose to the occasion the moment there was need, overcoming her natural aversion to their feeding habits. she knew she needed to be at full strength in order to aid him and was determined to do whatever was necessary to accomplish this.

before she could change her decision, lucian acted, merging their minds fully, taking control, commanding her to come to him, to take what she needed from her lifemate. jaxon rose with one fluid movement, sensuous, sultry, a full-blooded carpathian temptress. she moved toward him without a sound, like flowing water, graceful and beautiful. the dark night could not hide her incredible beauty, the whiteness of her teeth, the scent of her, her flawless skin or shapely body. lucian heard a soft groan escape his throat as even there, in the moonlight, with enemies approaching from all directions, the sight of her made his body tighten with urgent demand.

her small frame, soft and pliant, moved restlessly against his, warm satin skin melting into his heavier muscles. at once his clothes felt confining and coarse against his sensitive skin. her fingers brushed at him as she slowly unbuttoned his shirt, seeking contact with his warmth. slender arms wound around his neck as she pressed closer. his heart picked up the rhythm; his gut clenched hotly. she was moving so seductively against him, he thought he might not be able to stand it. she whispered something soft against his chest, her breath warm on his heated skin. her mouth moved upward over his throat to the pulse beckoning in his neck. her tongue swirled once, twice, her teeth skimming, nipping, scraping until his body was a taut, urgent demand so hot and needy he found he was having a difficult time concentrating on scanning the area.

angel, you are going to kill me if you do not feed now.

his voice was husky, betraying the desperate need he had of her.

at once he felt the white-hot lance of pleasure-pain slashing through his body, turning his insides to molten lava. ecstasy rushed through him like a fireball, spread like a wildfire as his blood flowed into her. they were connected for all eternity. he closed his eyes and savored the way his body felt, hot and hard and uncomfortable yet swamped with wave after wave of pure pleasure.

in all his existence he had never felt sexual desire or enjoyment when he took or gave blood. with jaxon he couldn't separate the two. he was not certain he could ever stand by and watch her feed from another man. the thought of her gliding seductively up to another male, her arms circling his neck, his head thrown back to allow her to find his pulse beating strongly, sickened him. her mouth moving over someone else's skin, her tongue touching, teasing, her teeth sinking deeply, connecting the two of them - the image swam alarmingly in his mind for a moment.

a fierce growl escaped his throat, and his eyes glowed hotly, red flames leaping in their depths. jaxon's tongue swept across the tiny pinpricks to close them, and she looked up at him. "what is it?" there was a hot, coppery flavor in her mouth, addicting and subtly masculine. she put the back of her hand to her lips and wiped surreptitiously, willing her stomach not to rebel although her mind was screaming at her in denial. she blinked up at lucian, trying desperately to appear normal. he had enough worries without always trying to placate her fears.

lucian swept his arms around her, holding her to him tightly. "you are the most important person in my world."

"i'm also turning out to be the biggest baby in the world. i can't believe how afraid i am of everything." she attempted a laugh, but they both knew she was telling the truth. "usually i'm really cool under fire, lucian. i don't know why i'm acting so silly."

"do not do this, jaxon. do not apologize to me when i am the one who made this decision for you. you have had much to learn and cope with in a short space of time. you are learning things that are completely foreign to you. i think you have done remarkably well under the circumstances." his hands came up to caress her hair. "i have no quarrel with the way you have accepted the extraordinary things i have demanded of you, and i am exceptionally proud of you." he leaned close. "can you not feel the way i feel about you? you have been in my mind enough to do so."

"i think i'm still afraid to look too closely. i'm still getting used to the new me," she admitted almost shyly.

"perhaps you would learn more of yourself if you saw yourself through my eyes instead of your own," he suggested, his voice black-velvet persuasion.

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