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beneath him, colby stiffened. he was talking about her birthmark. she reached down in an attempt to cover it, fear spearing through her. he pushed her hand away, locking his arm around her hip to keep her pinned down. "you had to have been born with this mark. i have not seen such a thing in centuries."
"i was told you would kill anyone with such a mark." he didn't sound as if he was going to kill her. there was a silky caress in his voice that made her weak all over. he nuzzled the birthmark, his tongue stroking over the shape and texture of it. she could feel his excitement pulsing through him.
"who would tell you such a thing? dragonseeker is one of our most powerful bloodlines. they are carpathians with skill and cunning and gifted with battle sense as no others and their lifemates often produce female children. we thought the family had died out a long time ago. no carpathian would ever harm a woman of the dragonseeker lineage, nor would they wish to harm a warrior of that house."
she lifted her head to look at his black, gleaming eyes. he meant every word. she relaxed beneath the silken heat of his mouth, "do you remember the woman in the parking lot of the bar? she heard you when you threatened to hurt anyone interfering with your business."
he nuzzled the triangle of curls with his chin, sending a wave of desire rushing through her bloodstream. "yes, she heard me when i spoke telepathically."
"she has the same birthmark only hers reacts differently. she was taught to avoid hunters and her mark grows hot when one is near, just as it does when a vampire is close by. she told me that an ancestor, rhiannon, left her lifemate, although she used the term husband, and went off with a powerful man. a war broke out."
"it is true that there was a war, but rhiannon was kidnapped and her lifemate murdered. she was held captive by a powerful wizard..."
colby groaned. "i don't know if i want to know this. vampires are bad enough, rafael. please don't tell me there are wizards."
"call them what you like. powerful beings trained in the ways of magick. they were well versed in the old ways when safeguards and spells were plentiful and all things of the earth were worshipped and cherished. they were called wizards only to identify their teachings and skills. rhiannon had begun to study with one of their most powerful teachers. he conspired to murder her lifemate and take her for his own. most lifemates do not survive the passing of their mate. her captor must have found a way to keep her alive for a time."
"natalya claims rhiannon had triplets, two daughters and a son, before she died. natalya said that rhiannon's son was her grandfather. natalya also suspected that her own brother must be my father."
"what of rhiannon's two female children?"
"she didn't know what happened to them. it was her father that taught her a hunter would immediately kill anyone bearing our birthmark. she also said the birthmark hid itself from you, that it would hide from hunters and vampires."
"of course he would say that." rafael pressed small kisses against the birthmark. "they would poison their children against us. what better revenge than to keep the line from the carpathian people, when we need them so much?"
"why would the birthmark hide from you?"
"i suspect it knew how strong the beast in me really was and reacted to that. most of the times i have spent with you, i have barely managed to control the darkness in me. it would seek to protect you from me as long as i was near embracing the temptation of our darker side, but there is no longer need."
colby's stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch. her skin felt oversensitized and something fiery hot swept through her insides, searing every organ in her body. rafael lifted his head alertly. she could see knowledge in his eyes. colby pushed at him to get him off of her, the strange wave of heat scaring her. "it hurts to have you touching me." her insides were suddenly on fire and she felt sick. she pushed at him harder, as the air left her lungs in a rush of flames.
colby's eyes went wide with shock. rafael felt the first wash of guilt. it wasn't a comfortable feeling and one he'd only experienced since meeting her. he rolled over, settling next to her, his arm caging her without touching her, his eyes watchful.
"what's happening to me?" knowledge mixed with her pain. "you know, don't you? what have you done this time?" the breath left her body and she nearly convulsed, her body going rigid as pain gripped her. nails bit deep into his arm.
"just breathe, colby." he hadn't expected the conversion to be so violent. his heart twisted. what if something went wrong?
"answer me! god, at least you can tell me what you've done to me."
"you are beginning to go through the conversion." her pain swirled inside of him, mixing with guilt and terror for her.
"i trusted you." her eyes were accusing, ravaged with pain and betrayal. she gasped the words, half sitting, attempting to twist away from him as she made the accusation. "how could you ever tell me you loved me? do you think this is love? you wouldn't know love if it slapped you in the face. love isn't betrayal and it isn't domination, robbing me of free will. i was trying to get to you in my own way and you took even that from me." the pain twisted like a knife inside of her and her eyes clouded. "i trusted you," she whispered again, her voice breaking.
rafael stiffened. it hadn't been like that. he knew he had to convert her for all their sakes. he wouldn't carry dominance that far. was he such a monster after all? the next wave was already building, rushing through her like a fireball, scorching skin and organs. she broke into a sweat and blood beaded on her pores. he whispered her name, brought cooling water from the waterfall to bathe her face. she turned her face away from him, clearly not wanting his help as her body went rigid with the next terrible blossoming pain. it swept through her, searing everything in its path.
fear lived and breathed inside of her. she pushed herself up, tried to crawl away from him, a hurt, wounded animal. he caught her in firm hands, his insides churning with bile. he had done this to her, in his own arrogance believing he had the right to her. he had no idea of the suffering the conversion would cause and it sickened him.
the pain was excruciating. colby's eyes were glazed and her body writhed. "did you do this to me so you could take paul and ginny?" she made the accusation hysterically. "you really aren't any different from the vampire controlling paul."
the hurt in her eyes, the suggestion of betrayal shattered his soul. did she see him like that? did she honestly believe he could do this to her to get the children from her? his soul shrieked in reprimand, in horror at him for what he'd done. he felt moisture on his face, knew he shed tears, knew he had committed an unpardonable act. she had been making her way to him but his lack of patience could very well have destroyed his fragile hold on her emotions.
he bent over her so she could see he told the stark truth. "i love you more than my own life, more than anything on this earth. i had no idea it would be like this. i swear i am telling you the truth. i am more sorry than you will ever know for bringing you into my world without your consent."
she looked up at his ravaged face, the blood red tears seeping from his eyes, and her heart fluttered with forgiveness for one brief moment. the next wave hit and she turned away from him, writhing and convulsing, the fire burning her from the inside out.
rafael could only remain helplessly by her side as the conversion took control of her body, forcing her to rid it of toxins, of everything human. his power meant little in the face of such pain. he attempted to take the pain for her, but it was impossible. they had no choice but to ride it out together. he tried to hold her, to comfort her, washing her, rocking her, murmuring as much encouragement as he could to her. all the while he felt he was dying inside. he couldn't take the pain from his lifemate. he couldn't take back what he'd done. he had to go forward now no matter the cost and he was afraid the price was going to be much higher than anything he'd ever considered.
when it was safe, he opened the mineral-rich soil and floated down into the depths of the earth, holding her in his arms. for the first time in centuries he found himself weeping hard, feeling lost and ashamed of his own actions.