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since he'd been near her, since she'd been absorbing small streams of his power when they touched, he hadn't been hurting nearly so much. he wasn't sure if that was going to slow down the rate at which his leaf was dying or not, but he knew that once it was gone, he could easily turn into the monster she thought he was.
and then what would he do? or, more important, what wouldn't he do?
"what is it going to take to prove to you that i'm not lying?" he asked.
lexi's head fell back on his shoulder in defeat. "i don't know, zach. i want to believe you, but isn't that the way the devil works? tells you pretty lies you want to believe? i can't do that to mom."
"are you going to try to run away again?" he still had the bracelet in his pocket. he could use it to keep her nearby if he wanted.
he didn't. he wanted her to stay near him of her own free will.
her head moved on his shoulder as she shook it.
"no," she said quietly. "i'm done running. this is going to end now, one way or another."
zach hated the sound of defeat in her voice, but he believed she meant it. she wasn't running anymore. "good. because if you stick with me, there's only one way things will go. you'll see the truth, and you and i will make each other happy for the rest of our lives."
"pretty lies," she murmured.
"no lies, lexi. i'm going to take you home and prove it. come on. the gerai brought us a new car, and we're only about four hours away from the truth."
he hated taking her to dabyr before he'd claimed her for his own lady. there might well be other theronai at home who were also compatible with her, and he didn't want to let her slip away again. but what he wanted wasn't as important as it had been only twenty minutes ago. he had to protect lexi from herself as well as the synestryn, and if that meant she ended up with another man, he'd just have to suck it up. at least she'd be safe. that was what really mattered.
if she did choose another man, it wasn't like he'd have long to suffer, anyway.
chapter 13
lexi made mental notes of the location of the sentinels' stronghold, just in case she needed to give the defenders directions via phone. it was set way back in a thickly wooded, isolated area in missouri, well off the main highways. a few houses and farms dotted the surrounding area, but the fortress itself was shielded from view by heavy bands of forest.
the compound had a high stone wall running all the way round it. or at least she thought it probably did. she couldn't see the whole wall for all the trees that obscured it, as well as a monumental building and a few smaller structures. the main building was made of a pinkishgrayish stone that sparkled under the late-summer sunshine. huge wings, like welcoming arms, spread out from either side of the structure.
even though it was a refuge for demons and killers, it was still a beautiful place.
they went through an iron gate that opened for zach only after he swiped his id and talked to someone on the other end of a camera. the paved driveway was easily half a mile long, and led to a gigantic garage filled with numbered parking slots.
zach pulled into one, and for a second, lexi thought her faithful old honda was beside them. of course, her faithful honda was still in the shop back in texas, but she gave a wistful sigh of longing for her beloved set of wheels. her home.
"looks like they beat us here," said zach.
"who?"
"vance and slade. your car must not have needed too much work."
lexi looked at the honda again. primer gray, lots of rust, even more dirt. yep, that was her car, all right.
"it's mine!" she shouted, jumping down from the truck.
lexi picked up the keys from the front seat and got behind the wheel. she cranked the engine, and it started with a smooth purr that hadn't been there for years. in fact, it had probably never run this well since she'd owned it.
"from the sound of it, nicholas has been getting his hands dirty," said zach. "that man has a way with moving parts."
they'd fixed her car. these people who were supposed to be her enemy had repaired her home and brought it to her. it wasn't worth much-in fact, they'd probably put more money into repairing it than she could have sold it for-but it was the one constant in her life and she loved it.
her vision went watery and she had to blink back hot tears before they could fall. "thank you," she told zach without looking at him. she didn't want him to see how much this gift had affected her. how vulnerable she'd felt without a means to run as she'd been doing all her life.
those days were over-she'd meant that when she'd told zach she was done running-but knowing she could if things turned ugly made her feel so much safer. like life was back to normal.
and then she remembered the explosives in the trunk and all those feelings of safety and normalcy vanished.
"i didn't fix it," said zach. "how about we go inside and find nicholas. you can thank him yourself."
lexi nodded. she couldn't speak right now, not with the lump of dread lodged in her throat. all she had to do was connect a couple of wires and push a button to detonate the c-4. the defenders had made her practice how to do it over and over until it took her less than thirty seconds for the whole process.
and that included opening the broken lock on her trunk, which was a chore on the best of days.
zach's fingers settled on her shoulder. they felt warm and strong and comforting, which was ridiculous. he should not be comforting her when she had the means of destroying his home and family. it was just wrong.
"ready?" he asked.
lexi gave a tight nod. "sure. just let me grab my suitcase."
zach beat her to it. he slung his heavy duffel bag over his shoulder, grabbed the handle of her suitcase, and offered her his free arm. the whole time, he wore a proud smile, like he wanted to show her off.
a sick sense of guilt clung to lexi's insides. it was stupid. he was her enemy, so planning to blow this place up wasn't a betrayal. the real betrayal was the way her resolve to do the job she'd promised to do wavered.
the defenders had taken care of her and her mom since she was a kid. whenever things got bad, mom would go running to them. neither one of them liked sticking around. hector morrow, the leader of the defenders, was a raging asshole, but he was better than the monsters that hunted them. they'd stay long enough to get back on their feet and mom would take off running again.
lexi hadn't had much to do with them since she'd grown up. it was only after zach had begun hunting her that she'd gotten desperate enough to seek them out. they'd taken her in and welcomed her back as if she'd never been gone, like she was one of their own. they'd gotten her the job with gus and made sure she had a paycheck and a place to sleep every night. it was more than she'd had in a long time, and the fact that she was even thinking about not doing as she'd promised them was the worst kind of treachery.
they'd warned her about how easy she could be swayed. her mother had warned her of the sentinels' powers of brainwashing. she knew these risks, and yet she still questioned her objective.
lexi took zach's offered arm, reveling in the comforting warmth that flowed between them. two days ago, she would have just as soon stabbed him as touch him, and now she couldn't seem to get enough of him.
it was all too confusing. she hated this uncertainty, the weakness inside her that made her question what was right and wrong. even knowing this confusion was part of the sentinels' strategy, she still couldn't shake it off.
she was weak. that was the real problem here. she'd never thought of herself that way until now. she'd always believed she'd be immune to their charms, but now she knew the truth. this wasn't something she could shrug off. no wonder helen had been tricked so easily. she hadn't even had the benefit of a mother who knew the score.
lexi had, and yet she was falling right into their trap.
"we'll put this stuff in my suite. then i'll take you to see helen while i go check in and find nicholas," said zach.
lexi nodded, wishing she was a stronger person. how was she going to save helen when she was being sucked down herself?
"are you okay?" asked zach.
she looked up at him, plastering a smile on her face. his eyes glowed with concern, his dark brow wrinkled.
"fine," she told him. "just a little overwhelmed."
"this place will do that to you. i guess i'm just used to it."
they passed through a hallway that led into a ginormous open area. the ceilings here were glass and so high up you could fly a kite inside. there were green plants and small trees growing everywhere, making the room feel almost like it was part of the outdoors.
dozens of people sat at tables, eating lunch, chatting like they were spending the day at the mall. there were women and children here, too. lexi hadn't expected to see kids.
she stopped in her tracks and took everything in.
"who are all these people?" she asked.
"humans, mostly. people we've saved from the synestryn but who can't go back home."
they didn't have the look of prisoners. they seemed . . . happy. kids lounged on couches at the far side of the room, watching tv or playing video games. a group of women was playing cards at one of the larger tables. through the glass doorway on her left, she could see a bunch of people outside, working out on all kinds of exercise equipment.
no one wore chains or prison uniforms. no one looked sick or like they were starving. in fact, the smells coming from the dining area were making her stomach growl in anticipation.
which left only one conclusion.
"you keep humans as pets?" she asked, appalled at the idea.
zach let out a bark of laughter. "you're kidding, right? what is it with you and this obsession with pets? if we want pets, we get cats and dogs like everyone else, though most of us are gone too much to have them."
"then, why are there people here?"
"because we couldn't clean away enough of their memories for them to go back out in the world safely. several of them have little pieces of the synestryn in their heads, and it draws the demons like a beacon. if we didn't give them a safe place to live, they'd be hunted down for food."
lexi's mind whirled, trying to add this new piece of information into those she already knew. try as she might, it simply didn't fit, which meant that either he was lying, or something else she thought was true was a lie.
she had to figure it out soon. she couldn't stay frozen in indecision like this forever. she had to either go through with her plan, or get back out there and make sure the defenders knew how wrong they were about all of this.
"i need to see helen," said lexi. maybe talking to her would help straighten things out.
zach gave her a funny look, half curious, half suspicious. "sure, honey. anything you want."
he set down the bags, and dialed a number on his cell. "helen, lexi's here and wants to see you. where are you? okay, we'll be right there." he hung up and said, "she's in her suite. i'll take you there."