"who?" roman asked.

"howard." tino sniffed. "he was so mad. i'm afraid he'll never come back."

"what?" shanna glanced at her mother for an explanation.

"i'm not sure what happened, but howard literally roared a few hours ago. everyone in the building heard it." darlene winced. "that is, everyone who was awake. we all went to see what was wrong, but he just growled at us. then he grabbed his car keys and ran out the door."

"it was scary," sofia whispered, edging close to her mom.

"sweetie." shanna lifted her into her arms. "it'll be all right."

roman picked up his son and headed toward the stairs. "don't worry, tino. we'll figure out what happened."

"phil might know," darlene said as they climbed the stairs. "he arrived about twenty minutes ago."

"i thought he was at romatech."

"he was." darlene paused on the landing. "he said howard called him from the airport in albany and asked him to come here and take his place."

"does that mean howard won't come back?" tino asked.

"we can't be sure," shanna told him.

they reached the ground floor and spotted a small crowd hanging around the entrance to the security office, mostly werewolf and were-panther students, along with a few mortal teachers.

toni greeted them. "i just got here. i was downstairs with ian. he'll be here as soon as he gets dressed."

shanna nodded. "let's continue with the usual schedule."

while toni and the teachers herded the students toward the cafeteria, shanna and her family entered the security office.

phil was pacing back and forth behind the desk, his face dark with rage.

something had to be terribly wrong, and shanna wasn't sure the children should hear it. she passed sofia to her mother. "i think the children should have their supper now."

sofia frowned. "we already ate."

"i don't want to leave." tino wriggled out of his father's arms and climbed into the chair facing the desk.

phil clenched his fists, clearly trying to control his anger. "i need to join howard. i can't stay here doing nothing."

"what happened?" roman asked. "is there a security problem?"

phil took a deep breath. "everything's under control here. and everything's fine at romatech, too. austin just got back from eastern europe, and he's taken over the security office there. it'll be safe for you to go to work tonight."

"that's good," roman replied. "so what's going on with howard?"

phil leaned over the keyboard to punch some buttons. "when i arrived, i found this window open on the monitor. take a look." he moved out of the way.

shanna and roman skirted the desk so they could read the monitor. as she scanned the online newspaper article, a chill ran down her back.

"oh my god," she breathed.

roman muttered a curse.

tino sat up. "what's wrong?"

she swallowed hard. "someone . . . passed away." that was putting it as mildly as she could.

"i gather howard knew this man?" roman asked.

"yeah." phil resumed his pacing, circling the room like an angry caged animal. "i met harry when i was in alaska. he was howard's best friend."

"oh no." shanna's heart ached for howard. "no wonder he was so upset."

"he lost his best friend?" darlene asked, still holding sofia.

shanna nodded. she didn't want to go into the details in front of the children. "you can read about it." she switched places with her mother and took sofia back into her arms.

"did he go to alaska?" tino asked. "why didn't he wait for a vamp to teleport him?"

"it'll be hours before the sun sets in alaska," phil explained as he paced. "i'm sure he didn't want to wait. i would appreciate a vamp taking me there tonight. i'd like to go to the memorial service."

roman nodded. "we can do that."

shanna's chest tightened once again. a memorial service. not a funeral. after a car bombing, there probably wasn't a body left to bury.

"oh my," darlene whispered as she read the article. "this is awful. who would do such a thing?"

phil drew in a hissing breath. "i know who did it. harry was a reporter for a tabloid newspaper, and last week, he started exposing the truth about rhett bleddyn."

roman's eyes narrowed. "the werewolf? the one who bit phineas?"

"yes," phil growled. "when howard called me, he was mad as hell. he knows rhett's behind the car bombing. and what's more, he suspects the bleddyns murdered his father. harry's father, too. harry was investigating it right before he was blown to pieces."

shanna winced. this was getting too violent for the children. "phil - "

"i think rhett murdered howard's girlfriend, too," phil snarled. "i hope he kills that asshole. if he doesn't, i will."

"you want to kill somebody?" tino asked, his eyes wide.

"phil." shanna gave him a pointed look. with emotions running high, it was easy to read minds at the moment. phil was furious. roman, angry. darlene, appalled. sofia, frightened. and even though tino was shocked, he was thinking how cool it was to be witnessing all the adult drama. shanna wished once again that he wouldn't be in such a hurry to grow up.

she patted her daughter on the back. "don't let this upset you. you know how big and tough howard is. he'll be okay."

sofia gave her a hopeful look. "really?"

"of course." shanna forced a smile. "nothing ever gets howard down."

"that's right!" tino nodded. "he beat up a whole bunch of wild pigs with huge tusks!"

"what?" shanna hadn't heard that story.

"oh, i forgot." phil grabbed an envelope off the desk. "howard left you a note."

shanna set her daughter on the chair next to tino, then opened the letter.

"what does it say?" tino asked.

shanna quickly scanned the letter. it was calmly written, so howard must have penned it before finding out about his best friend's murder. he was asking shanna to meet elsa tonight to discuss the kitchen. and he needed her help in convincing elsa that he was a safe and dependable guy. elsa knew about him being a were-bear, and apparently, she was now afraid to trust him. "i need to go to the gatehouse tonight for a meeting with elsa."

tino perked up. "can i come? i like elsa!"

shanna folded the letter. "you saw her television show?"

"no. i met her when - " tino bit his lip.

shanna glimpsed some alarming visuals in her son's mind. "oh my gosh. what have you been up to?"

tino winced. "nothing."

"tino." roman gave him a stern look.

he squirmed in the chair. "everything would have been fine if the wild pigs hadn't shown up."

roman arched a brow. "we'll all go to the gatehouse together, and you will tell us what happened on the way there."

tino slumped. "okay."

roman ushered the children out the door. "come on. let's get the van out of the garage." he glanced back at phil. "ian should be here soon. he can find someone to teleport you to alaska. if howard needs anything, just let us know."

"yes," shanna agreed. "please tell howard how sad we are for his loss and how much we love him."

"yeah," tino shouted from the hallway. "tell him to come home soon!"

"i will." phil nodded. "i have a few hours before i can go. i'll be with vanda till then." he hurried off in search of his vamp wife.

"i'll be along in just a second," shanna called out to her husband as he escorted the kids to the front door.

"can i tag along?" darlene asked. "i'd like to see what they're doing with the gatehouse."

"of course," shanna agreed. "wait here. i'll be right back." with vampire speed, she zoomed back to the bedroom, threw off the baggy sweatpants and t-shirt, and put on some tailored pants with a matching top and blazer. she brushed her hair, slipped on some nice sandals, then zoomed back upstairs. "better?"

"yes." her mother looked her over. "you're trying to impress somebody?"

"sorta." shanna strolled down the hall with her mother. "howard asked me to convince elsa that he's a good guy, and i thought i'd be more believable if i looked presentable. i feel so bad for him. this seems like the only thing i can do for him right now."

darlene nodded. "so he's courting elsa?"

"he's trying. poor howard. he let elsa know that he's a were-bear, and it's giving her some serious doubts."

darlene winced. "it would be tough to find out your boyfriend is a grizzly bear."

"i know. it reminds me how freaked out i was when i discovered roman was a vampire. i was so attracted to him, but at the same time, i was afraid he'd attack me."

"are you feeling any better about your situation?"

shanna sighed. "i realized something the other night when i was watching the little mermaid with the kids. tino was upset that ariel had given up her voice and her tail to be with the prince. i said something about there always being a price to pay, and that's when it struck me. if i'm going to live in my husband's world, i have to be willing to pay the price."

darlene nodded. "so i guess the question is: are you willing?"

shanna snorted. "i have to be. i don't have any choice in the matter now."

"but i heard there is a choice. toni told me about a woman named darcy who was a vampire and turned back to being mortal."

shanna nodded. "i know about the procedure. roman did it."

"have you considered - "

"no. i mean, yes, i thought about it, but no, i won't do it. there's a twenty-five percent chance of death, permanent death, and i'm not taking a chance that my children will lose me completely. at least now, they've only lost me half the time."

darlene frowned at her. "do you love them half as much?"

"no, of course not!"

"then don't say they've lost you."

shanna swallowed hard. "you're right. i just miss seeing them during the day."

"what if you kept the kids up all night and let them sleep during the day?" darlene suggested. "you'd have more time with them then."

shanna shook her head. "i won't subject them to a life of darkness. they're already staying up till midnight. that leaves them waking around noon without us, but roman and i both agree - they need some sunshine to grow up healthy and happy."

"that's probably true. i'm certainly enjoying my time with them. caitlyn's babies are a joy, too." she smiled. "of course i'm not prejudiced in any way."

shanna slanted a curious look at her mother as they approached the front door. "it still amazes me how quickly you adjusted to it all."

darlene shrugged. "there's no point in denying reality when it's right there in front of you."

"yeah, but . . ." shanna wasn't sure she should mention this. "i don't understand why dad thought he had to control your mind so you could deal with stress. you handle things really well on your own."

darlene snorted. "the operative word there is control. sean is a control freak. he wanted me to handle everything his way."

"does he still call you every night?"

"like clockwork."

"you . . . still hang up on him?"

darlene shrugged. "lately, i've been letting him talk for a little while before i hang up. i get a perverse pleasure out of hearing him wallow in misery."

"has he ever apologized?" shanna asked.

"many times. but then he ruins it by claiming he did it for my own good."

shanna groaned.

"but for the last week or so, he's been taking all the blame. he admits he was wrong, and he begs me to forgive him."

"what do you say to him?"

darlene sighed. "at first, i was so angry, i just wanted to hurt him. but now, i try not to even think about it. cause if i do, it hurts me something awful. i have eighteen years that i can barely remember. it's like he stole all that time from me and i can never get it back."

"mom." shanna hugged her. "i'm so sorry."

"he wants me to turn," darlene said softly.

"what?" shanna leaned back, completely caught off guard, which didn't happen often to her.

"sean wants me to join him as a vampire. he says i could have centuries, and it would make up for the time i lost."

"oh my gosh," shanna breathed. it had been shocking enough when roman had transformed her father in order to save him. but her mother? a vampire?

darlene smiled sadly at her. "i said no. as silly as it might sound, i actually like my life as it is now. i get to see tino and sofia every day. and i spend a lot of time with caitlyn and her twins. i don't want to give up my days with my grandchildren. i suspect sean is afraid of spending the next few centuries all alone, but that's his problem, not mine."

"you're sure? there are plenty of mortals around here who can babysit during the day - "

"i'm sure." darlene patted her on the arm. "i'm very happy now. besides, i doubt i could last five minutes with sean without wanting to stake him. i'd never last a few centuries."