since kai was a child, he'd had to maintain a great deal of willpower and self-control to keep up this mask he was made to wear. from the time he was aware enough to realize that he wasn't female, that he was different from everyone else around him and a non-person, he'd had to struggle to hold onto the tatters of his self-esteem. he had to try not to loathe himself, and that was still something he still struggled with. his entire society thought of men as defective, as less than a female, and over the years, this attitude had taken its toll.

feeling neither fully male nor female, he struggled with his identity, and now here was this powerful male, this man who fascinated and attracted him, one who was fairly dripping with testosterone, insulting and accusing him. partly, at least, it seemed the alpha held him in contempt because of the clothing and makeup he'd been forced to wear.

the unfairness of it all rushed through him in a torrent of rage. kai's usually impressive control over his temper snapped, and he put a hand on the alpha's chest and pushed him violently away. lucas staggered back a step or two and looked at kai with surprise before moving toward him so quickly, kai never even saw him coming-just a blur of movement and then he was on him. he was just there, with his hand around kai's throat, pushing him roughly back against the castle wall and leaning down into kai's face. he wasn't exactly hurting him, but exerting enough pressure to keep him still.

his other hand moved down between kai's legs and he parted his robes roughly, throwing them aside to put his hand at kai's groin. feeling the leather straps there, he cursed in some other language that kai figured was lycan, and took his other hand away from kai's throat to rip open the pretty blue robe and undershift he wore from the neck down. he looked down his body to the strap that fastened around his waist and cursing again, he unbuckled it and threw it to the floor.

released from their prison, kai's genitals fell down between his legs and even kai could smell the arousal. he looked down at the long piece of flesh between his legs and was horrified to see it thicken. a white drop appeared on the head and kai bit his lip, moaning in embarrassment and shame.

lucas glanced down at it and back up to his face. then deliberately, he wrapped one big hand around it, his thumb softly stroking the mushroom-shaped head, smearing the drop over the top. no one had ever so much as touched him there that he could remember. his genitals had always been an object of shame, and an outward sign of his inferiority. he could only gasp for air like a landed fish as lucas moved his hand over the silken flesh.

"you like that, don't you? tell me how much you like it, kai." lucas's voice was gruff and hoarse with some strong emotion, but kai moaned and pushed at his chest again, throwing him off. lucas growled and for a moment something peeked out of his eyes that frightened kai. lucas thrust kai back against the wall again, shoving him hard and pressing his body back against kai's.

unprepared, kai's head slammed back, almost stunning him for a moment. he quickly recovered and lifted a knee to jab it into lucas's groin. the alpha's reflexes were quick, and though he twisted his body at the last moment, kai still inflicted a little damage. lucas gasped and winced, hunching his body over for a few seconds and breathing hard. his hand around kai's throat, though, never loosened its grip.

kai drew up his knee again, but this time lucas was ready for him. he shifted away, and kai's knee landed on the side of his hip. lucas bumped his head into the wall again, and this time, kai saw stars dancing in front of his eyes.

he let his legs collapse under him, and lucas, startled, pulled his hand away from kai's throat to catch his biceps and hold him up. kai straightened and caught lucas on the chin with a quick left hook. staggering backward, lucas shook his head, making a little huffing sound. he lowered his head and plowed into kai before he could dance out of his reach, shoving him back against the wall. he didn't really hurt kai, but his shoulder caught kai in his solar plexus and knocked the breath from his body. kai hung from the wall, gasping, and lucas took him by the shoulders, holding him in place and staring into his eyes.

"you done?" he snarled breathlessly and kai nodded shortly, struggling to take in a breath of his own.

lucas stared down at him another few seconds before he loosened his grip. kai knew he was only toying with him, and that his strength was much greater, but kai was fighting for his life. even though it was probably too late, he couldn't seem to make himself stop. he kept his head lowered, wanting the alpha to think he was finished and presented no further threat. his stomach and chest were aching, not to mention the pains in his head. he thought he felt blood trickling down the back of his neck from his scalp. lucas was obviously much stronger than he was, but some sense of pride wouldn't let kai quit. the man already had no respect for him, and kai couldn't live with that. as soon as lucas shifted his hands, kai stomped down on the alpha's foot as hard as he could. he was wearing soft slippers, so he mostly managed only to hurt his own foot, but it must have surprised lucas because he shifted backward, allowing kai to make a break for the door.

kai made it about three or four steps before his feet were knocked out from under him and he crashed to the floor of the balcony, on his back and looking up at the stars. he sensed more than saw lucas's big booted foot coming toward him and rolled out of the way, catching only a part of it on his hip. he scrambled back to his feet and only barely managed to miss another kick at his ankles. he backed wildly away and felt the balcony railing at his back. off balance, he tried to catch himself, but still felt his feet go out from under him. as he fell helplessly backward off the rail, a big hand hauled him back upright and set him on his feet. lucas's face pushed down into his, and his body plastered itself to him.

"don't fucking move, boy, or i'll hurt you."

"hurt me?" kai huffed out a short, harsh laugh. "you've damn near killed me as it is. go ahead. they'll finish the job anyway."

lucas narrowed his eyes. "who? what the fuck are you talking about?" his hand clutched the front of kai's robe, and he used the grip to haul him only inches from his lips. he shook kai slightly. "tell me."

"the council doesn't know. when they do..."

"then what?" lucas shook him again. "tell me, damn you."

"they'll arrest my mother and re-assimilate me." he glared up at the alpha. "isn't that what you want? go ahead. get it over with."

lucas frowned and straightened slowly, pulling kai with him. he put kai back on his feet and glared at him for a long moment. "how could that be possible? what do you mean re-assimilate you? what the hells does that mean? the council surely knows about this trickery. you and your mother almost pulled it off too."

kai stared at him silently. he would say no more, and he'd probably already said too much. he raised his head hopelessly and stared into implacable dark eyes. he had to try to save his mother. he had failed her, and the poor women like merrial who tried to help him all his life would be imprisoned along with her. he felt an almost crushing guilt. "just...just please don't blame my mother. it was all my fault. i did it. she just went along with it for me, but it was my idea. i-i know you don't owe meanything, after all this, but please. "he took a deep breath, wincing as his ribs protested the move. "please don't blame anyone but me. i beg you."

lucas continued to stare down at him, with no sign he'd even heard his plea. he took a step back and blew out a long breath. "straighten yourself."

kai looked up at him in confusion. "what?"

"i said, straighten yourself." he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket. "wipe the blood from your face and neck. do it now."

kai took the handkerchief from him and wiped it over his sweaty face, wiping away blood from his lips and nose that he hadn't even known was there. he pulled the handkerchief down and saw that most of his makeup had come off with the dirt and blood. he pressed it to the back of his head and winced as a fresh jolt of pain shot through him. trying to calm his breathing, he pulled at his robe to straighten and close it. it was torn and dirty and all the fastenings were gone, but he did the best he could, holding it closed around himself. his body was still taut with adrenalin and tension coursing through him, but he was thankful that the lycan had given him a moment to gather himself before he had to face the council.

when he'd done the best he could, he handed the scrap of cloth back to lucas, but lucas looked down at it scornfully, then tossed it over his shoulder to the floor. gripping kai's arm, he hauled him toward the council room. kai tried one more time. "my mother...please."

"shut up," lucas snarled and kai shut his eyes, wincing against the sudden glare of lights from inside the room. blayde, still stationed by the door of the balcony, goggled at them in shock as they emerged, and a hush fell over the crowd. both of them were stained and dirty, and looked as if they'd been rolling around on the floor-which they had been, of course, only seconds before.

queen ashlan cried out in alarm when she saw kai and rushed toward them, but before she could reach them, lucas held up a hand to stop her. "there was a slight accident. the. . . princess is fine. don't alarm yourself."

kai blinked and looked up at him in surprise, but he was striding across to the council, pulling kai with him, his grip strong and sure. he stopped in front of the council's table and kai gazed at their shocked faces. before they could say anything, lucas's voice rang out firm and loud. "the wedding between us will take place immediately. i've received word that i must get back to my ship right away. have kai's servants prepare her things. we'll go back to my ship directly after the wedding ceremony."

the council members stared at lucas in shocked surprise, but he could feel his family gathering at his back. lucas faced the scythians confidently, fully prepared to fight his way out of this chamber and take his mate if he had to.