i open the door and let her pass. she takes the lead and i catch up. i make air quotes as i say, "discriminating borrower."

a frown forms on her lips.

"i'm just screwing with you."

"i know," she says, but i can see a sadness dwelling in her eyes.

the walk back to her car is short. she unlocks her door as soon as we arrive. when i open her door, she hurries to get in.

"red . . ."

she twists before sitting. "you do know my name is bell? don't you?"

i shake my head in disbelief. "yes, i know that." of course i know her name, but she told me not to call her s'belle the last time i saw her, so i came up with another suitable name for her.

"okay, just checking." she turns back around in her seat.

i hover inside the car door, feeling a little nervous for some strange reason about what i'm about to say. finally i push it out. "i want to see you again."

the lampposts above us cast shadows over her face and i'm unable to read it. she hesitates for a beat before saying anything. but just then our eyes find each other and something passes between us. "you can call me, but i'm not looking for anything but sex right now," she says.

if i said i wasn't shocked as shit by her words, i'd be lying. i mean, what guy doesn't want to hear that? but for some reason i wasn't jumping out of my skin at her offer. the attraction between us is undeniable, and in fact i can feel the heat getting hotter with each passing moment-the way her body reacts when i'm close to her and the way mine aches to draw her near. but there's more than just a physical attraction. i can see she feels it too. it's in her eyes-the way she looks at me.

as i'm standing in her car door staring at her, trying to figure out where she's coming from, i realize what i saw in her eyes earlier wasn't hatred or loathing; it was trepidation. i know because i'm looking at it again right now. and i understand that she has reason to be scared. i can't deny it. so i nod and whisper in her ear, "who am i to turn down an offer like that?"

chapter 6

dig in

bell

in a tangle of sheets, i toss and turn, stuck somewhere between the dreamworld and the real world. i can't get ben covington out of my mind. his intense blue-eyed stare. the black tuxedo tailored to his perfect body. a missing bow tie-displaying a glimpse of a rebel. the man knew how to use his hands and mouth and i was completely charmed by him. i wanted more of what i know i couldn't have-a bad boy my family would never accept.

my phone shrills from my nightstand. i jump, blindly reaching for it. four rings later i finally grab it.

"hello?" my voice sounds raspy with sleepiness.

there's a slight sigh along with barely audible breathing, and a push of a button that alerts me that i'm being taken off speakerphone. "bell, are you still sleeping?" tate's voice asks in an eerily seductive tone.

i look around my dark room but see faint light through the blinds. i whip my head around and my eyes race to the digital clock beside me. it reads eight forty-five.

"yes, sorry. late night."

i hear a squeak of the chair. "baby, i miss you. tell me what you have on."

"tate, that's completely inappropriate."

"i know but i'm desperate. when are you going to forgive me? please give me another chance."

i sit up and draw my knees to my chest. "we've discussed this. we're over, tate. we've been over for a long time. where is this coming from?"

"dino told me he saw you in the parking lot with some guy last night. did you let him f**k you?" his voice is cold and his question crude. one i would never answer truthfully to him, especially put like that.

"tate, i'll be by in an hour to pick up the cake topper and bring it by caroline's for her approval before i drop it off at the bakery. do you need anything else before tonight?"

"you should have been here already. it's almost nine," he hisses.

i bow my head between my legs, so tired of the temper tantrums and mood swings. i think to myself, not much longer. you can do this. failure is not an option.

"i'll be there as soon as i can," i say, keeping my anger at bay and then hanging up.

working for him has been a roller-coaster ride. it certainly didn't help that i mixed business with pleasure and started dating him-made him my boyfriend. almost a year ago now i came to work for him. shortly after, right about the time my brother got married, he started asking me out and i didn't see any harm, so i said yes. by new year's i was over him. we went on dates that always ended with make-out sessions in the car and good-byes at the door. i just wasn't attracted to him enough to sleep with him. one night he pushed for more. i threw him out and told him i would never go out with him again. the next day he apologized profusely and said it wouldn't impact our working relationship. and for the most part it hasn't. he's moody, sure, but he was like that before. he's also brilliant at his job and i've learned so much from him.

although to be honest i don't love event planning the way he does. at first i thought maybe it was just weddings i didn't care for, so i started my own consulting business. when i started out, i used to think of event planners as the man behind the curtain like in the wizard of oz. magicians tasked with creating something fabulous out of a myriad of details, all the while making it look effortless for the client. however, it turns out that i'm more like a firefighter dousing flames in every direction. but since failure isn't an option, i'm going to stick with it. i finally found direction in my life and i'm not going to let myself or my family down.

rolling out of bed, i know i have to start my day. as i walk slowly toward the kitchen, i pray i have enough cream left for one cup of coffee. then i can't help grinning. one very large cup of starbucks coffee sits on my counter with a note in my mother's handwriting.

i was in the area, so i stopped by to check on you and drop a few things off. i didn't want to wake you. pop the coffee in the microwave. enjoy your day. call me later.

love, mom

my family is amazing. i don't know what i'd do without them. my mother and my stepfather, jack, are always stopping by with things for my apartment, food, or just to check on me. i love the company. leaving home wasn't as easy as i thought it would be. my mother knows what a hard time i've had adjusting to living on my own, and since i haven't tried very hard to make this place a home, she's done it for me. she used to call first, but i told her she didn't have to. it's not as if i have anything to worry about. i haven't dated anyone since tate. i decided to give up boyfriends and concentrate on myself for a while.

my brother river and i have always been close. i'd go as far as to say he was my best friend for the longest time; maybe he still is. we were together so much when we were younger, people used to think we were twins. his wife, dahlia, and i are also really close. in fact she is the only one who knows about what happened with tate and also how i really haven't found my dream job. she wants me to quit and has been trying to get me to move in with her and my brother until i figure out what i want to do but um . . . no, thank you! i love them both to death but they are way too cutesy to live with full-time. i'd be pulling my hair out. actually, who am i kidding? i'm jealous as anything and would love a relationship like that.

and my brother xander, what would i do without him in my life? he's my rock, my voice of reason. he's always looked after me and guided me when i thought i was lost. but he's also stern and a bit of an ass at times. i have to say now that he has a girl in his life, he's softened . . . slightly. ivy though, she's amazing and the best thing about her-she makes xander unbelievably happy and he deserves it.

yep, i'm the baby in my family, and they treat me like one . . . but i wouldn't trade any of them for the world. i pop my coffee in the microwave, and after it's warmed up, i truck to the shower to get ready to start my day.

once i'm dressed, i hop in my car and drive to work. my mind keeps wandering back to ben, to last night. to his delicious body, what i saw of it, and the heat between us. to the way i wanted to touch him everywhere. how fast he got turned on and the things he whispered in the dark-dirty, hot words in the heat of passion. and to how hard i came with him inside me. that had only happened once before-and it was with him.

the wyatt events office isn't far from where i live in west hollywood and i make it there in less than fifteen minutes. even as i walk down the street, ben's still on my mind. i wonder if he'll even call me. and if he does, what will i say?

as soon as i step through the modern space, i'm startled out of my thoughts when tate's voice booms loudly, "bell, i need you in my office. now!"

i glance up at the clock-ten after ten. i'm really not late considering that i won't be home until at least ten o'clock tonight. my gaze swivels to josie, tate's assistant. she's tall, almost as tall as my sister-in-law, dahlia. she's waiflike with blond and blue hair-her hair complements her pale blue eyes perfectly. she has a punk rock style that is killer. she took my place when i got promoted to consultant. her eyes lock on mine and she ever so slightly shakes her head and mouths, "piss-ass mood."

"great," i mutter under my breath as i pass her and linger in the doorway.

"come in and close the door," he says.

he checks the time on his watch, then looks up at me sharply before his eyes drift down my gray dress all the way to the red patent leather pumps i'm wearing. "what are your plans after you go see the bride?" his voice is calm and i'm surprised.

"i thought i'd come back here and gather what we need for the venue."

he nods. "i'd like to take you to lunch. to discuss the evening's schedule of events."

"sure, of course."

"okay, then. thank you for taking care of caroline's insecurities about the topper. i'm sure it will be fine."

"it's not a problem, tate."

just then my phone rings. i never switched it to vibrate because being summoned into his office was unexpected.

"that's all. i'll see you back here around noon and you pick the lunch spot." he slips on his reading glasses and directs his attention to the stack of papers on his desk.

"hello?" i pull my phone out of my purse to answer as soon as i step out of tate's office.

"hi there." ben's voice flows through the line, warm like molasses, and i melt a little right there in the hallway.

"hello," i say again before realizing i already said that.

he chuckles. "i want to see you tonight."

"i can't. i have to work."

"then tomorrow night." he's not asking.

i know that we can't go any further than what happened last night. it's just not possible. but i already told him that. so like last night again-sure, why not? one more time. sex only. i can do that. "sure, tomorrow night. i'm at work now, so can i call you tomorrow with the details?"

a laugh echoes through the line. "i'm calling you. how is it you're the one deciding on the plans?"

"oh, i think you'll like what i have in mind," i coo to him. josie's head snaps up and i drop my gaze to the floor, unable to look at her.

"when you put it like that, how can i say no?"

"okay, i'll be in touch tomorrow. i have to go. bye." i hang up and rush to my desk.

in a matter of minutes fingers are tapping on the wooden surface. "spill it," josie says.