i even felt like a princess in my rose pink gown, held in the arms of an actual prince. my chantilly lace strapless corset top draped down just below my drop waist into an angled tier over folds and folds of a chrysanthemum organza blossom skirt. kiran presented me with a thin silver tiara, tucked into piles of tamed curls a palace hair dresser spent hours perfecting. pink sapphires glistened against my neck and wrists in antique royal jewelry, and dangled from my ears as dainty accessories testifying to the wealth of the royal family. i never felt more elegant. more beautiful.

more like an imposter.

even my relationship was a lie. the stolen kisses, the dreamy look in my eyes, the secret whispers between a prince and his future bride encouraged the illusion that kiran and i were soul mates after all. with his hand around my waist even now, and his eyes desperately searching out mine, i was even tempted to believe that he still loved me.

i laughed at myself, invoking curiosity from my already confused partner. i couldn't explain to him the audacity of my situation, of my imprisonment. i didn't want to. i didn't owe kiran anything, certainly not an explanation on every thought that flew through my head.

"are you having a good time?" kiran asked, sensing my reserve.

"yes," i answered simply. his eyes stayed on me as i let him move me around the floor, drawing me ever closer to him.

"you are lovely tonight, eden," he whispered. my eyes found his then, irritating me that he wasted a sweet moment in a whisper.

"i know, you've told me at least ten times already," i snapped. he flinched and i instantly regretted my outburst. as frustrated as i felt with my situation, i needed a reminder that i got myself into this mess. kiran was actually behaving himself, and had gone out of his way to help make sure i didn't do anything that drew negative attention or lucan's watchful eye. "i'm sorry," i gave in and watched his stormy blue eyes fade into brilliant turquoise.

"you're sorry?" kiran pressed, "for what?"

"for being short with you," i conceded. "thank you, i feel like a fraud."

"because you're here against your will?" kiran's eyes searched mine for the truth, but i was reluctant to give it to him.

"no, that's not why. i don't think it would matter if i came here as a prisoner or really in love with you.... i mean, look at this place, it can't be real. and this dress? i'm not this girl. i don't think this girl exists anywhere except fairy tales and disney movies," i finished sincerely. ileana's words ran through my head; it was time to choose to be immortal. we both had our feet in two worlds, but unlike ileana, i really was only immortal, and it was time to come to terms with that.

"what girl?" kiran asked, his brow furrowing with concern.

i paused as a dignified, elderly couple stopped dancing to pay us compliments on what a wonderful couple we were. when they moved on, i continued, "the girl from the middle of america that gets swept off her feet, and thrown into a fantasy where princes are real and she falls in love at a ball wearing a tiara. that girl doesn't exist, does she? i mean, this can't really be happening...." i trailed off, looking around at the magnificence of the room.

"that depends," kiran teased, "i didn't realize i had to make you fall in love with me tonight.... i might have done things differently if i had."

"what would you have done differently?" curiosity overcame common sense and i found myself asking the question before i could stop myself.

"well, for starters, i wouldn't have promised my father we would stay until the end," kiran confessed, his eyes full of mischief.

"and what would we have done instead?" i pressed. his eyes held me in their hypnotic gaze, and the rest of the dancers twirling around us seemed to disappear.

"i would have made you forget that you are my prisoner, and convinced you that you are here because you want to be. because i want you to be." his lips twisted into a playful smile and he drew me closer to him, moving across the dance floor with a suave grace.

"that might have been hard to do," i sighed, thankful for the reminder that i was his prisoner.

"you're probably right," he conceded, but his eyes still twinkled and his lips still curved into his smirk. his tanned skin stood in smooth union with his crisp tux, complete with tails and a bow time. his hair slicked back and out of his face, and his golden crown tilted on the top of his head. i could feel the eyes of every girl in the room watching him, lusting after him. and for a second, i couldn't blame them.

"besides, you no more want to make me fall in love with you than i want to fall in love with you," i reminded him.

"i don't know if that's true, this dress is doing funny things to my resolve," he whispered seductively.

my mouth dropped open just a little bit from disbelief at the same time the music finished. we stood near the edge of the dance floor, and when other couples started to move from the floor, kiran leaned down and kissed me sweetly, very sweetly..... too sweetly.... on the cheek. i closed my mouth, unable to think of anything to say and he took my arm and led me away from the dance floor.

still bewildered, kiran walked us to the far corner of the ballroom where dignitaries and old friends of the king milled about together in polite conversation. he seemed to be searching someone in particular out, so i took the silence to gather my senses and reinforce my own resolve that seemed to be faltering under the glamour of the evening.

"eden, this is kate and jonathan summer. jon was just a few years older than me at briar-rose. kate was his high school sweetheart, but now she's the mother of his children," kiran introduced us with warm affection and i couldn't help but be intrigued by the gorgeous couple.

jonathan, roughly the same height as kiran, seemed reserved, but gentle. his silver eyes sparkled against his especially tanned skin and his light blonde hair was slicked back in formal style. he held his arm affectionately around kate, gazing down at her as if she were his whole world. kate was more interested in me, scrutinizing me with clear green eyes, the color of my emerald engagement ring. she was one of the few women present to wear her hair down, and her long auburn locks fell in waves over her bare shoulders and striking crimson ball gown.

i fidgeted nervously under kate's stare. they were a stunning couple, with a regal air about them. but jonathon looked at kiran with all of the respect in the world, and i relaxed a little knowing they held kiran in such high esteem.

"it's wonderful to meet you, eden, we've heard so much about you," kate gushed, in a crisp british accent.

"thank you," i replied, wondering if it was kiran who had talked about me or just kingdom gossip in general. "it's a pleasure to meet you."

"eden, would you mind terribly if i left you with kate for a few minutes? jon and i have some business to discuss," kiran approached carefully, lowering his voice and asking gently with his eyes.

i didn't have any real objections, and decided it would be nice to separate our magics for a while. i smiled and replied, "i don't mind."

"i'll just be a moment," kiran leaned down to kiss me on the cheek again, before turning me over to kate.

kate took my arm and led me away from the crowds of people pressing together in the full ballroom. we found our way to the outer walls of the room and onto a stone balcony, open to the night air and moonlight, before either of us tried to say anything.

kate let go of my arm and walked over to the edge of the balcony, resting her delicate hands on the cool stone. she looked out into the gardens, a curious look on her face. i couldn't quite read her. i wasn't sure what she thought of me or even what she thought about being alone with me, so i decided to join her at the balconies edge and find out.

"beautiful night," i remarked casually, hoping to draw her into conversation.

"mmm...." she agreed and then fell silent for another minute.

"how long have you known kiran?" i tried again and then realized my mistake; he was the prince. she had always known him. "i mean, how long have you been friends with him?"

"jonathan and kiran have been friends since childhood. jon's father is the european regent. so i suppose, i met kiran when he arrived at briar-rose his freshman year. jonathan and i were already seeing each other, so i got to know him that way."

"so, jonathan and kiran are good friends?" i pressed.

"yes, very good friends. or as good of friends as their positions in the kingdom will allow them to be," she admitted. "we certainly know kiran very well."

she finished with such certainty that i wasn't sure how to respond. it felt as though she were accusing me of something, so all i could say in return was, "oh."

"but i guess not well enough to know why, since he is your fiance, he is trying so hard to appear not to be in love with you." kate turned to me, her eyes taking in my dazed expression as i slowly understood the meaning of her words.

"no, you have it wrong," i insisted. "he is in love with me, i mean, he's pretending... i mean.... he's not pretending anything. he is in love with me. we are in love with each other." i fumbled through an explanation before realizing he was supposed to be in love with me. there was no need to defend myself, because kiran and i wanted people to believe that we were in love.

"right, that's what i meant," she agreed, but i didn't like the sparkle in her eyes all of a sudden. "did you know, that it's rumored your parents fell in love in those very gardens?" her gaze fell to the chaotically overgrown maze of flowers and hedges stretched out below the balcony, and bathed in the soft moonlight.

"my parents?" i gasped, wondering what to make of the abrupt change of subject.

"yes, as the story goes, your mother would come out here at night, in the moonlight and walk for hours through the maze just to escape lucan's constant attentions. lucan naturally sent justice to look after her well-being and that is how the romance began," she whispered conspiratorially.

"i didn't know that," i mumbled, looking down at the gardens with a new interest. i pictured analisa's neglect of the gardens as her silent plea for freedom, but maybe it was the memory of my mother that encouraged her to let them run wild. or maybe it was both of those reasons.

"well, i suppose it's just a rumor," she sighed.

"do people talk about my parents often?" i asked, wondering how the general population perceived my parents. "i mean, are there lots of rumors?"

"of course!" kate exclaimed, "there are always rumors with scandals. but for a long while they weren't spoken of. people stopped believing in the girl that defied the king. she was replaced with the coward that abandoned her people."

"oh," i realized then that what i heard was right, people were angry with my mother.

"until recently that is," she lifted her emerald eyes to mine and accused me silently for the second time of an offense i couldn't understand.

"why until recently?" i asked in a hushed tone, afraid of others from the ballroom overhearing our conversation.