i was stunned into complete silence.

"i will be there in the morning. i will stop at the safe house for an update from tyler first. you are to stay in your apartment and you are not to leave. do you understand me?"

"yes."

"jessica, that is a direct order."

"i understand."

"hand the phone to james."

i did.

10

i ran a wet washcloth over my face and rinsed the last of the smeared blood down the drain. i'd been avoiding the mirror. trying to imagine what i looked like as a half wolf, half human didn't come easily to me.

i squared my shoulders over the sink. it was now or never. the mess in my living room wasn't going to wait indefinitely.

lifting my head, i gazed into my reflection.

i looked like my normal self, only more worn out.

my hair was messy, falling everywhere, but it was back to my regular length. i had contusions all over, but they were healing fast. i leaned in closer and saw a violet fleck flash like a banked ember in the farthest reaches of my irises. calling them yellow now would be silly. there was nothing yellow about them.

i had violet eyes.

just like my father.

i hadn't remembered to tell my father that bit of news, but my eye color was the last thing i'd been thinking about. i grimaced in the mirror. lycan must've been a horrid sight. a wolf in its full animal form was the most unbelievably beautiful creature in the world. but half a wolf?

likely the worst.

the most captivating wolf in the world was my father. the image of him in his true form had been as much a part of me as anything i could remember as a little girl. he was glorious-his fur dark as coal, towering above all others, strong and dangerous, but breathtakingly beautiful at the same time. truly magnificent.

i stepped away from the mirror, tossing my shredded running shoes into the plastic bag i'd grabbed from under the kitchen sink. my clothes would soon follow.

i tied up the contents and opened the bathroom door and headed out into the new chaos.

"the coast is officially clear," nick declared, turning to prop my broken door in the jamb behind him as he and danny came back in. the door had been unlocked, but knowing i was in danger, james hadn't waited to see, he'd simply come through it. "we corralled your neighbors and ushered them back inside their apartments quickly."

james and tyler had rolled the dead body into one of my spare sheets, and were in the process of discussing the best way to remove it from my apartment.

danny chuckled. "yes, we told the lot of them out there in the hallway that we were having a huge party and it had gotten a little out of sorts. and they bought it hook, line, and sinker."

nick snorted. "they bought it after i told them to buy it."

"the only other issue was the police outside, but nicky here took care of that as well." danny slapped nick on the back. "mighty fine gift, persuasion is."

"the police were here?" i asked in alarm.

"relax, jess." nick came over and put his hands on my shoulders. "it wasn't ray, and they were just here to investigate a 'noise' disturbance-not a gruesome werewolf killing. i convinced them they were at the wrong building. everything's fine now."

"thanks." my wolf paced inside my mind. she and i were both still agitated. "we have to get him out of here quickly." i glanced at the rolled-up corpse. "and then we have to figure out what the hell is going on-why he was even here in the first place. i've only been a werewolf for a day. it seems too quick to have someone after me already, almost like this guy had been sitting by the phone."

"we need to bring him back to the safe house so we can look into his identity and figure out what's going on," james said.

"agreed," tyler said. "we'll take him off the balcony. danny and i'll go down in front and you can drop him out to us."

i raised an eyebrow and interjected, "um, that seems a little on the unsubtle side, don't you think? tossing a body-shaped object off my balcony is bound to be noticed by someone."

they stared at me blankly.

reasoning with wolves was going to require patience, but right now i had none. "well, how about this, then," i said. "if it does get noticed-and subsequently reported-i can't afford any more scrutiny on me right now. in case you've all been living with your heads up your asses the last few days"-my voice rose several decibels as i spread my fingers apart and started emphatically ticking off-"i just finished killing a werewolf we know nothing about. i will likely have to testify in court about killing a pedophile imp. my apartment has already been the scene of a vicious, unexplainable break-in, which happened ... oh, that's right ... four fucking days ago. an identified drug that could knock out a stable of animals was taken from my home"-my voice peaked as i slammed my pinky finger-"and i just made some freaky, impossible transformation into a beast, bound to have every superstitious werewolf in the entire goddamn universe gunning to end my life. so i refuse, refuse to add tossing a human body wrapped in my own bedding from my balcony to that damn list! are we clear?" tension radiated off me like a furnace. it swirled around the room, hot and palpable.

three pairs of wolf eyes locked on me, each of them sparking with more than a hint of amber. only one pair of calm golden ones in the mix.

wolves did not function well in heightened emotional situations. it certainly didn't help when my muscles started to vibrate and soft fur began to sprout along the backs of my hands once again.

my wolf stood in a protective stance, legs apart, muzzle up in my mind.

danny broke the tension and strode forward. he walked to me in a surrender pose, shoulders hunched, eyes carefully downcast. "easy there, jess," he murmured as he knelt down in front of me. "i promise you the lot of us here aren't going to do anything to bring you any harm. in fact, it's quite the opposite, really. wolves can be really bloody stupid, it's true. we're stubborn and aggressive, and we never take kindly to change. but i promise, you're safe with us." he placed one of his hands over his heart. "i swear to it on my own life."

i stood very still. i didn't trust myself to respond. my wolf watched danny carefully. the lines between her and me were still blurred from our encounter with the rogue. i'm not sure what had happened during the fight, but for now she was on this side. there were no dominance issues between us at the moment, only an equal unity to keep us both safe.

danny's eyes met mine for a moment and skittered away. he glanced quickly over his shoulder at james, tyler, and nick, who stood slightly behind him. "i think i can speak for everyone in this room, the very ones who watched over you as you grew up"-his face changed to a devilish grin-"and may i interject here to say you grew into quite a ravishing beauty." he winked. "all of us plan to stand by you and we are fully prepared to lay down our lives to protect you, jessica mcclain. we always have been." leave it to danny to defuse an awful situation with a pseudo pickup line and end with a heartfelt statement.

i smiled warily. my wolf relaxed a tad at his words and fur stopped sprouting along my arms.

"we have always known," he continued, "that having a female among us would be risky. i knew it when i joined this pack, and we all chose to stick it out despite the myths and rumors. any one of us could've left anytime we wanted to, but we didn't. we chose to stand by you and your father. callum mcclain is a great leader who deserves our respect, just as you do." danny bowed his head. "i gave my vow of fealty freely to my alpha. i swore to follow this pack to my death. now i give it to you. i intend to hold up my end of the bargain and to protect you at all costs. i promise, you have nothing to fear from me, jessica mcclain."

shockingly, he dropped his head back and exposed his neck to me.

my wolf responded immediately with a rough bark. she accepted his posturing like it was her right, and growled with pleasure, nudging me to accept what he was giving us.

i blinked. my human side was wildly uncomfortable.

i trembled where i stood. i didn't understand any of this.

this was all wrong. it had to be. instead of moving forward, i took a small step backward. my wolf responded with a sharp, angry yip.

my eyes darted to my brother. he met my stare for a second before his voice sounded in my mind. it's okay, jess. tyler was quiet. this is normal. danny's wolf has recognized your dominance over him, so he's acting as he should. he can either choose to fight you for status or he can yield to you. he's choosing not to fight you, which is extremely smart of him, since i would rip his goddamn throat out if he tried.

tyler, my voice vibrated with emotion, i don't understand what's happening to me. this can't be true. none of the myths and rumors were supposed to be real. i'm not supposed to be strong. i'm a female, which means weak in our world. i've always been less. a wolf like danny should not be submitting to me. it has to be a mistake.

jess, it's going to be okay. when dad gets here, we can sort it out. i have no idea what's going on either. it's going to take us some time to figure it all out. when you changed, your wolf was fully realized. it came the way it was meant to be. your job is to shape and control it the best you can. we were both alpha-born. it's not something you learn. you just need time, and i promise everything will fall into place.

i'm not sure i have that kind of time. i glanced at the dead body rolled up like a mummy in my lavender sheets. then to danny, who was still on the floor in front of me, neck back, waiting patiently for me to do something. what am i supposed to do now?

flash him your teeth, meet his eyes for the count of five, and then walk away like you don't give a damn.

that's it?

tyler snorted. that's it, sis. then we try to get back to fucking normal as fast as we possibly can.