"let's go to the kitchens. tory, can you skip us in?" ry grinned. they had sissy back, karzac would make her well again and toff wasn't being bullied anymore. things were looking up at the moment.

"what is skipping?" toff managed to ask before he disappeared from one place and appeared in another. the other place turned out to be the largest kitchen toff had ever seen. it had things in it that he didn't recognize, too. three people were inside the kitchen, cleaning up.

"young ones, i am not surprised to see you, since you failed to finish your dinner earlier," one of the three came forward to eye tory, ry and toff. "and who is this? he looks quite familiar to me."

"this is cheedas, who runs the palace kitchens," tory nudged toff. toff was gaping at cheedas, who looked familiar to him, too. cheedas had silver in his hair, an indication to toff that he might be old.

"would you like something to eat?" cheedas reached out and ruffled toff's hair. toff was surprised by the gentle gesture.

"i am hungry," toff nodded.

"then you'll eat. sit. all of you," cheedas commanded, and toff sat while cheedas and the other two found food for him and the princes.

"what is this?" toff had never had anything he liked so well. it was a tender steak that had been breaded and fried. the main course was served with mashed potatoes, gravy and tiny peas. toff hadn't realized how hungry he was.

"mom calls this chicken-fried steak and we make fun of her because it isn't chicken at all," tory grinned, cutting into his steak and placing a bite in his mouth.

"i like this very much," toff was busy eating.

"how old are you, young one?" cheedas leaned on the kitchen island across from the three boys. "my guess would be around eighteen."

"really?" toff couldn't believe it. he would turn eighteen in less than three months. "everybody else says i look twelve."

"but your kind matures slowly," cheedas replied. "did they not tell you that? you will not reach full growth until age twenty-nine. do not be discouraged-it is just what you are."

"redbird always said i was vionnu-from vionn." toff swallowed his bite of food before speaking-it was polite. tory snorted at toff's statement. "is that not true? i'm not from vionn?" toff glanced from cheedas to tory in confusion.

"i know not the reason why she might say that to you," cheedas straightened. "you are most certainly not vionnu. how did this redbird explain your lack of genitalia?"

toff stared openmouthed at cheedas. the cook had just revealed toff's most shameful secret. how had he known? how?

"i see that it was not explained to you," cheedas said. "it is not a deformity, young one. all your kind are born this way. you are what i am, young toff. comesula. that is singular. comesuli is plural. we are native to le-ath veronis and your foster parents should have told you of this long ago. from vionn, they said." cheedas walked away, shaking his head.

"we knew the minute we saw you," ry said. "is that what they did-make you ashamed because you weren't like them? that's awful. this is how you're supposed to be."

toff was now staring at ry. "don't worry," ry continued. "i think mom will send someone in the next few days to explain things to you. you're a whole person, toff. don't let anybody tell you otherwise."

"but what about girls and coupling and things like that?" toff was almost afraid to voice those fears. he liked nissa very much, but according to gren and the others, he had nothing to offer her. that upset him.

"as i said, mom will send somebody to explain that to you. don't worry. you have options." tory patted toff's shoulder. "finish your food. maybe we can sneak into the pool, too, before somebody finds out we're not in bed."

"this is all you use this for?" toff was astounded that there was a pool of warm, clear water used only for swimming and nothing else. all three boys had jumped into the water without clothing, and ry was busy trying to splash tory. toff was also shocked that neither of the others had said a word about what he lacked. cheedas had told him it was natural-he was supposed to be this way. why had the fae and the halves told him otherwise? toff couldn't fathom a reason.

they'd been in the water for perhaps an hour when someone walked in that toff hadn't seen before.

"hi, dad, we just wanted to have a swim," ry grinned sheepishly at erland morphis.

"that's ry's father, uncle erland," tory whispered to toff, who nodded. he was afraid they were all about to be in trouble.

"time for bed, all of you," erland had fists on his hips. they reluctantly climbed out of the pool and tory headed for the pile of towels on a nearby table. he tossed towels to ry and toff, then dried himself with another and wrapped it around his waist afterward. toff watched closely and followed tory's example. erland led the way and took all three of them toward ry and tory's suite.

"we brought in another bed-there's room in between with an extra closet," erland pointed toff toward the largest bed he'd ever seen. "we'll see about getting clothing for you in the next day or so. welcome to the palace, young toff." erland smiled at toff and closed the door to toff's new bedroom behind him when he left. since toff didn't have pajamas with him, he slid naked between smooth sheets for the first time in his memory.

"nissa, baby, daddy's not mad." shadow had nissa pulled into his lap as soon as she woke. "how's your head, sweetheart?" shadow stroked nissa's hair. nissa wrapped arms around her father's neck and wept.

"baby bird, it's all right." uncle karzac was there in a moment, rubbing her back gently and using power to clear away any residual headache. nissa pulled her head away from her father's shoulder and blinked tearfully at karzac.

"they tried to kill me, didn't they?"

"baby, don't think about that now," shadow attempted to calm his daughter. "you need to eat something, i think. you missed your dinner last night and breakfast this morning. your mother is about to have one of her conniptions, i think."

nissa gave a trembling smile. conniption wasn't a word used in any of the languages recognized by the alliance. it was something that her mother used, however, and uncle tony said that it was a legitimate word. somewhere. "come on, young one. we'll have lunch with your mother and your brothers."

"what happened to toff?" nissa looked into her father's gray eyes.

"he's here, too. your mother refused to leave him behind this time. good thing, too-they were filling his head with all sorts of lies." karzac huffed angrily over that fact.

"they were calling him a eunuch. when they thought i was toff, they called me that, too. and worm, baby face and a bunch of other ugly names," nissa wiped a stray tear off her face.

"neither you nor toff are any of those things," karzac declared. "come, i think cheedas has made chicken and dumplings for you."

"really? they never make it at grey house." nissa was ready to eat.

"because they don't know how," shadow let nissa slide off his lap. he rose and draped an arm around his daughter's shoulders as they made their way out of nissa's suite and down marble halls toward the dining room.

"nissa?" toff stood the moment she entered the room, accompanied by karzac and another man.

"toff." nissa went straight to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "i was so worried about you." she even kissed his cheek before letting him go. toff stared after her as she went to sit next to her mother at the head of the table. toff was sitting between ry and tory only a little farther down. ry tugged on toff's borrowed tunic and toff remembered to sit down again.

"uncle roff," tory nudged toff and toff turned swiftly in his seat, his breath catching in his throat for a moment as roff walked into the dining hall. tory's uncle roff had wings. they were held tightly against his back for the moment, but toff could only imagine what they might look like if they were spread out.

"ask him to fly you around, sometime," ry whispered as they watched roff glance briefly in their direction before finding a chair next to tony. several servants came to serve the meal and toff knew they were of the same race as he-he recognized it now, thanks to cheedas. one of them winked slyly at toff as he served a soup. toff smiled at the servant before he hurried away.

"toff, we want you to take a day or two off to recover. we'll set you up with morwin after that-he'll tutor you in the mornings while ry and tory are practicing with drake and drew," queen lissa smiled at him. toff felt a bit of shock-the queen had been so kind to him. she'd hugged him last night, and may have kissed him, even. now she was offering lessons. "do you want to stay in the same bedroom you had last night, or do you want one to yourself?" the queen asked.

"i can stay with tory and ry?"

"we want you to," tory nodded. "if you want to, that is."

"i want to." toff stared at his hands for a moment. he wanted to ask why he was in the palace and why everybody was being so nice to him. he was nothing to them, yet they were treating him as if he were a member of the family. "i would like that very much, thank you," he remembered his manners, albeit a little late.

"good. we have someone coming in who will bring some clothing for you. you can pick out what you like," the queen went on. "is there anything you want brought from home? corent has already offered to send whatever you need."

toff was embarrassed to ask for the small wooden box of bits and pieces he kept beneath his bed. "we'll just have him send everything, and you can pick and choose," the queen told him. "let's eat, i'm starved." everybody started eating, then, and ry and tory quickly had toff smiling as they teased one another, and then nissa was getting onto her brothers and soon they were all laughing. for toff, that hadn't happened in a very long time.