"find reah," wylend snapped. "find her. immediately." several ran to do his bidding.

renegar had shown me the old palace on beliphar; had told me i could use it if i wanted. that's where i was, huddled in blankets on the wide bed. everything in this wing was placed in stasis. the fabrics, walls, roof, food, everything was pristine. no dust touched any of it. none of that mattered. was wylend using me? why had radolf's mother called me filth that he'd chosen? where had that come from? where? it didn't matter; i was homeless again. i should just get used to it. nobody wanted me for me.

"you have such a low opinion of yourself." kifirin sat on the end of the bed. a tiny curl of smoke filtered away from his nostrils.

"what opinion should i have, mighty god of the dark realm?" my voice dripped with sarcasm.

"you are loved, and not just by the ones you left behind moments ago," kifirin said. "i exercise patience with you as a gift. do not push me, daughter of my heart."

"or you'll what?" i snapped. "have me beaten as a child? used up by the asd? kill my unborn child?"

"reah, do not. i would hold you, if you would allow it. i see now that you do not know how to truly accept love. it was withheld when you were young, so now you know not how to deal with it as an adult. i will consider this. what i want to tell you is this. your father loves you now."

"what? are you crazy?" i was probably well on my way to being burned to a crisp for calling a god crazy.

"reah, time has no hold upon my kind. six lifetimes of penance your father served for his treatment of you. just before edan desh was scheduled to be released from his prison, i switched his current spirit for one six lifetimes from now as he lay dying upon another world. that edan never had a child, although he longed for one. this edan you might love. might take your troubles to. sit in the shelter of his arms. he searches for you, little demon. to offer apologies."

"and i'm just supposed to skip right to him and call him father?" i couldn't believe what i was hearing.

"i ask that you give him a chance. he is not the man you knew. through six lifetimes, he has done many things to protect children. that was his punishment. think on this, little demon. how many will you punish by withholding your love? yes, some have mistreated you. take what they have to offer. give them the opportunity to make amends. forgiveness is difficult for you; i know this. allow them to treat you gently now, in recompense for harder times before."

"well, stupid me-is that all it is?" i snapped. "i have a hard time forgiving? listen to yourself. did you wonder when you were six what you did to make your father hate you? at least i thought addah was my father then." i hugged myself to keep my hands from shaking.

"no. the one who made me gave me love." kifirin disappeared.

"sure. disappear when you don't have a good answer for something." i wiped wetness from my cheeks.

lendill cursed. in multiple languages, the last of which was elvish. many books described elves as benign creatures-tall, beautiful and soft-spoken. lendill could tell them with certainty that when kaldill was angry, he could make anyone blush with the words from his tongue. lendill had learned from the best.

"where the fuck is she?" lendill asked for perhaps the tenth time. drew stood nearby, arms crossed over his wide chest, his eyes hooded and a slight scowl on his face. had he known it, he looked very much like dragon, his father, at that moment.

"no idea. we can't trace a power signature from a high demon," corolan sighed. "wylend is so furious he is still locked in his suite, attempting to calm himself. i sent a message to erland on campiaa, asking that he and the queen watch for reah."

"none of the rest of us have the ability to find her either," lendill muttered, raking fingers through his black hair. corolan explained-twice-what had happened. lendill had no idea that someone else was expressing interest in reah. now, radolf, garek's son, had folded away from karathia, leaving his father distraught. they'd lost his trail after a while-radolf was powerful enough to scatter the signature. corolan couldn't have said anyone knew of radolf's ability to do that until now.

"the bitch has been punished?" lendill asked. radolf's mother had caused this. lendill was glad she wasn't present-he was tempted to strangle her.

"her power removed and banished from the palace and the king's sight. he'll kill her if he sees her again," corolan nodded.

three days passed. three days. i ate little and slept less. the bed was where i stayed most of the time, crawling out of it finally on the morning of the fourth day and dragging the sheets off. a laundry room lay next to the kitchen, meant to clean the kitchen towels, napkins and tablecloths from the tables. i used it to wash the sheets, towels and my own clothing-i only had what i'd worn when i left karathia. i wandered around, wrapped in a towel while my clothes dried. i ate a little; there was fruit and dried pasta. i put a dish together, only eating a bit of it. i intended to keep my promise-i was going to heal thiskil's core as soon as i was dressed again. no matter that the promise was made to one who'd helped kill my mother and my daughter. i made the promise. i would keep it.

thiskil had been destroyed ten turns after cloudsong's destruction. still, i recalled renegar's words and chose six stars. a kitchen timer sat beside me-it would tell me when a click passed so i could switch sources from which to pull energy.

"very wise." a larentii appeared and sat beside me shortly after i turned full thifilatha. this was not renegar-i knew that immediately. his eyes were bright and piercing as he looked up at me. standing at well over eight feet, normally i would look up to him. at fifteen feet in full thifilatha, i now looked down upon him.

"welcome, honored larentii," i inclined my head in a slight bow to him. he gave me a dazzling smile.

"i came to observe," he said, still smiling.

"you are welcome to do so," i replied and focused on the first star.

"you glow when you do this, did you know?" the larentii was still there when the core was healed and sealed up again.

"i've never seen myself when i do this," i sighed. i was nearing exhaustion-the recent neglect of my body most likely was to blame. i had no idea if i'd have sufficient energy to skip to beliphar.

"i will take you," the larentii offered. in a blink, i was inside the massive kitchen. "you should eat and then rest," he said while i plopped onto a chair i'd dragged in earlier. i nodded, holding my head in my hands. a headache was coming on.

"i will go now," he added.

"what's your name?" i asked, looking up at him. you'd have thought the sun broke through clouds when he smiled.

"nefrigar," he replied before folding away. he was back in less than a blink. "now is a good time to visit falchan," he was still smiling when he disappeared again. it reminded me of a child's story that gavril had given me to read once, in an attempt to teach me his mother's native language. a cat had disappeared, leaving only his smile behind. i'd forced my way through the book. i could still read some of it, but speaking the words eluded me for the most part. i took nefrigar's words to heart, however. when i was strong enough, i was going to falchan.

gavril cursed. and then cursed again. things were going so well for the fledgling campiaan alliance. he'd thought to visit reah. now, through erland, he was learning that someone had upset reah on karathia and she was missing again.

"i think, after keetha called her filth and told her to stay away from her son, garek made it worse by making it sound as if she were a shield for wylend, when he meant that she wasn't a likely target for any witch or warlock if they wanted to get to wylend by harming his mate," erland explained.

"she didn't wait for an explanation, she skipped away immediately. radolf left right behind her. now, they can't find either of them." erland was angry on wylend's behalf. who'd allowed that foul woman into the palace to begin with? when erland returned to karathia, he'd do some questioning.

"child, we have meetings to attend this evening," dee, sitting nearby, thought to bring gavril's attention back to the present. they'd met inside gavril's private study. once belonging to arvil san gerxon, gavril had removed the garish and ostentatious from the spacious room, opting instead for the tasteful and understated.

"gavril, we'll find reah. she's turned up every time in the past-i don't believe this will be any different. take pride in your accomplishments. you've formed an alliance from nothing. and you've convinced wylend to come aboard. the reth alliance courted him for centuries. this is no small accomplishment, son."

"i know, uncle erland. i was hoping that reah would be with me tonight. at the ball."

"wylend has scrapped the date for his marriage as well-since we can't say for certain when we'll find her. i can't believe the wise ones brought her back for nothing."

"yeah. you're right," gavril rubbed the back of his neck in a frustrated manner. how the hell could he apologize to reah if he couldn't find her to offer the apology?

i waited two days before going to falchan. in that time, i gathered enough gold coins from beliphar's abandoned treasury to do for a bit and put a wardrobe together. i packed two sets of leathers i'd purchased, and the rest was plain but nice and would last. i couldn't predict how long i might stay, but i wanted to experience as much of falchan as i could. with my large bag in hand, including my pilfered gold, i skipped to the world i'd dreamed about when i was a child.

the capital city of cedar's falls was lovely and crowded. the streets, still the same after centuries, were narrow and lined with carefully placed flat stones. kiosks dotted the streets and alleys, competing with more permanent buildings lining the street. everything drew my eye-red flags snapping in the afternoon breeze over a storefront, a rice wine bar called the dragon's breath had customers inside and out, while another shop sold jewelry. what pulled me was the ringing sound of a hammer on steel far down the way. someone was crafting metal. i hoped they were making a sword. hastily i jerked my rolling bag behind me as i walked in that direction.