Cry, Even Better if you Beg

Chapter 55

?What Must I Destroy??

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“I don’t think this is the right way to go to Arvis.”

Leyla was the first to break the silence upon noticing the car speeding through Carlsbar’s main street instead of returning to Arvis. She clutched at her bag and coat, grip tightening until her knuckles turned white.

“Mr. Evers,” She began, addressing the aide seated in the front. “This road-“,

“Leyla, I believe I’ve told you.” Matthias abruptly cut her off. “I will take responsibility.”

Leyla raised her face, shooting Matthias an angry glare. ‘Take responsibility?’ His words replayed in her mind, and her hands clenched into fists with anger. She hadn’t heard anything more nonsensical.

“I ruined your clothes on purpose. It is only natural that I should be held accountable for it.

“No. You don’t have to. I..”

“Why? Are you insisting that I am not in the wrong?” Matthias repeated tenaciously, despite the presence of his aide and the driver, who were seated stiffly in the front of the car.

Leyla grabbed her skirt. She took a deep breath. No matter how hard she scrubbed, the red stains on her hands and clothes stayed stubbornly on, as if they were mocking her fury.

‘That gift.. I should immediately throw it away.’

Leyla bit her lip. Even if it was utterly foolish to believe that refusing the Duke’s gift would sever the relationship between them, she couldn’t help but think it.

Unable to deny how lost she currently felt, Leyla wanted to cry from shame.

‘How-‘

Hoping against hope for an answer, she glanced at the Duke. The look he gave her reflected the bleak cityscape, cold and filled with a tinge of frustration. Hopes dashed, she looked away, breaking her gaze.

As the sun hesitantly peeked through a thick layer of clouds, the car came to a stop at a street filled with high end stores and upscale boutiques.

The driver and the aide both exited the car without a word, leaving only the mismatched pair behind. The instant they had left the car, the air in the car became heavier, temperature dropping by a few degrees. Leyla immediately tensed her shoulders.

“I-I’m going to leave now.”

Grabbing at her umbrella, Leyla hurriedly spun to the side. Before her hand could reach the car door, Matthias forcefully grabbed her wrist.

“Where are you going?”

“Home. I don’t need any clothes. I’m going home!”

Matthias kept his grip on her wrist without much effort as Leyla instinctively struggled to pull her hand away.

“Don’t be selfish, Leyla.” He said gruffly. “Why aren’t you taking Bill Remmer into consideration?” Matthias scoffed, loosening his grip on her wrist.

“W-what? What do you mean?”

The mention of her uncle was enough to make her struggles stop.

“How heartbroken would Mr Remmer be if he sees you like this?”

“I am surprised that the noble Duke Herhardt is concerned about my uncle after he did this to me.”

“Well, Mr Remmer has worked as a gardener for our household for decades. It is only right that I worry for him.”

Grip tightening on her wrist once more, Matthias pulled her close to him, so close that he could feel her breath against his face.

“Are you confident that you can come up with a good excuse when Mr Remmer asks about what happened to you, upon seeing this pitiful appearance?”

“O- of course.” Leyla stammered. Matthias’s hand swiftly grasped her cheek as she tried to free herself from him, leaning in close to her small ears.

“Unfortunately, Leyla, I am fully responsible for you.” He whispered. “After all, all your misfortune is caused by me.”

Matthias’s gaze was intense, filled with the obsession she knew he had towards her. Leyla desperately tried to break her gaze, but to no avail.

“It is my responsibility to hand you back to Mr. Remmer in perfect condition. Even a single blemish on your clothes will not be tolerated.”

“N- No need! You don’t have to! Let me go! I..”

“Think about it, Leyla. There’s nothing wrong with accepting my apologies and receiving your rightful compensation. Don’t you think your act of disobedience and stubbornness would appear quite weird?”

Matthias’s solemn gaze shifted towards the window. The driver and the aide were standing outside, ignorant of the quarrel taking place inside the car. “They might think you’re a petulant mistress.”

Extremely offended by his vulgar joke, Leyla frowned fiercely.

Releasing her hand, Matthias smirked, reaching out to knock on the window. Mark Evers nimbly turned around, opening the back door. Leyla quickly leapt out of the door like a bird that was freed from its cage, unwilling to waste her newfound chance for freedom.

Matthias glanced at her ruined bag and coat. Gesturing to Mark Evers, Matthias gave brief instructions to the aide, closing the door once he was done.

He resumed his staring out of the window. His blue eyes narrowed as Evers attempted to drape his coat over the freezing Leyla. Before Evers could make a move, a faint knock on the window interrupted him. Pulling his coat back on, he swiftly re-opened the back door.

Matthias took off his coat and handed it to Evers, who obediently took the coat without question.

The door slammed shut once again and the only sound inside the car was the raindrops hitting the windows.

Matthias’s steady gaze never left Leyla, watching as his aide wrapped her, who was too dazed to realise whom the coat belonged to, in his coat.

Soon, the driver returned and started the car’s engine. Leyla followed Mark Evers into the boutique’s fitting room, her hands tightly gripping Matthias’s coat.

Matthias’s gaze lingered on her for a long time.

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“Why are we going in there?”

Leyla came to a stop as she glimpsed the luxurious hotel she had been given the privilege to attend last summer, when she had tea with Claudine and Matthias.

“It was the Duke’s command, Miss Lewellin.”, Mark Evers explained, smiling. “The Duke informed me that he will only return to Arvis after treating Miss Lewellin to a cup of tea as an apology.”

“N- no, it’s fine. These clothes are more than enough for an apology.”

“Miss Lewellin, it is not for me to decide.”

“But-”

“Miss Lewellin, I’m simply following the Duke’s orders.” Mark Evers said, a little baffled by Leyla’s attitude. “Please don’t make it difficult for me to accomplish those orders.”

Running out of reason to give for her stubbornness, Leyla followed him with heavy steps.

“Did you know that the Duke is currently raising a bird just like you, Miss. Lewellin?” Mark Evers blurted out as they entered the hotel lobby. “A tiny, pretty yellow bird.”

“A bird? The Duke?” Leyla frowned in disbelief.

‘That psychotic bird slayer raises a bird?’

It was the weirdest thing she’d ever heard, and even more difficult to believe in.

“Is he raising it to hunt it?”

The question filled with paranoia left Mark Evers dumbfounded. Before he had a chance to clarify the misunderstanding in his master’s stead, they had already arrived to the entrance of the tearoom.

Mark Evers escorted Leyla to Matthias, who was seated near the window overlooking the rainy terrace, promptly leaving the room the moment his job was done.

Seeing Leyla standing blankly without moving an inch in front of him, his stern voice rang.

“Sit down.”

Reluctantly, Leyla sat down in the chair opposite of him. She removed her coat, revealing a newly bought turquoise velvet dress with shiny pearl buttons adorning its front, and a wide lace collar that was white as snow. It was clear that everything she was wearing was brand new, from her shoes to the stockings that ended mid calf. Her hair had also been done up into an elegant yet natural looking style. Compared to her usual nun-like outfits, Matthias was pleased to see her in a more elegantly styled dress.

They were served tea and an assortment of exquisite desserts not long after.

“Eat.” Matthias ordered while holding his tea cup.

Leyla didn’t move, flashing him a look of stern disgust instead.

Matthias met her glare headon, as if it held no threat to him. “Shall I feed you?” He asked arrogantly. “I am more than willing to take responsibility for that as well.”

At Matthias’s declaration, Leyla hastily grabbed her fork. She hesitated only a moment before choosing a light pink cream cake.

Satisfied by her obedience, Matthias straightened his posture and continued to observe her.

“What kind of delicacies do you prefer?”

Matthias asked curiously, watching her silently savor the cake. She appeared to be a fan of desserts, a fact that was seemingly trivial that nevertheless piqued his interest in her.

“Save for the foods I have to eat in front of you, everything is to my liking.” Leyla retorted coldly, fiddling with the fork handle. Despite her attempt to sound confident, her voice trembled.

Matthias’s chuckled, little pearl-like bubbles of sound that were soon muffled by the sound of raindrops splattering against the windowpane. “Did you know that it’s your proud attitude which I am attracted to?” He leaned towards the table, while saying, “My intrigue of you grows when you’re cocky like this, believe it or not.”

“...”

“If you decide to continue to behave like you do now, then I reckon it won’t take long before I am addicted to you,” Matthias scoffed, his voice soft like a bird whistle.

Petrified by his words, Leyla found herself leaning back instinctively as he bent closer towards her.

“Wouldn’t it be better if you acted innocent and docile?” Matthias said, grinning, “That way, I might grow tired of you.”

Matthias leant back in his chair, as if he believed Leyla would fall out of her chair with fear if he moved in closer.

After much thought, Leyla placed the fork down. Cheeks flushed, she quickly wiped at her lips with a napkin.

“So, what do you like?”, Matthias asked once again.

“..I am not a picky eater.” Leyla replied calmly.

It was quite a sight for Matthias to behold, seeing Leyla striving so very hard to keep her “true” self under wraps.

“Really? Good girl.”

At his remark, Leyla immediately tamped down her ire, although her eyes sparkled with fury, revealing her true emotions.

‘Let’s see just how long you can act like this.’

Matthias devoured the words he wanted to say with a sip of coffee. Just the slightest glance of Leyla glaring with impudence despite shuddering with despair sent him spiralling into madness. Matthias couldn’t stand the thought of anyone else seeing that expression of hers—it gave him a strange sense of superiority, thinking that he was the only person who knew of Leyla Lewellin’s other persona.

Leyla was demure and stoic, obediently answering any questions he asked while finishing her food without causing a fuss—completely unlike the usual self that Matthias knew. The only times her facade broke was the occasional glances of discontent she sent his way, and the blush that appeared once or twice as she bit her cream smudged lips.

The time they spent together was sweet, if limited, but only obtainable by nefarious means, such as pouring ink onto Leyla’s coat in a mischievous prank. At the realisation, Matthias laughed heartily, only for his pleasure to fade as it dawned on him—he could only give Leyla something by breaking her first.

‘So, only by hurting you badly will you be mine....How ridiculous.’

He stared possessively at Leyla, eyes gleaming with an odd light as a smile returned to his face. He found it interesting how her docility, instead of dousing his interest in her, only served to drive him crazier instead.

‘Leyla... What must I destroy to possess you?’

Matthias tilted his head, sinking further into rumination.

The sky outside the window was getting dark. Leyla finally turned her head, meeting his gaze. Her eyes looked as if they were softly woven with fine green threads, large and beautiful like emeralds.

Entranced in their beauty, he could do nothing but admire her gorgeous eyes.

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