Episode 61

Ghosts of Failure

Jason Kazar was so sure. Eris Misérian would hold his hand.

The idea of being rejected did not exist from the beginning.

“Sorry Lord Kazar, I’m going to take my knight as my partner.”

So when Eris refused, Jason had no choice but to be surprised. At first he thought she was going to say no once because of her dignity.

But he paused at the part where she said, ‘I’m going to take the knight as my partner’. Jason glanced at Anakin and spoke in a soft voice.

“I don’t think he’s on the same level as you. Wasn’t that why you chose me at the coming-of-age ceremony? If you walk in with that knight, wouldn’t everyone at the debutante ball laugh at you saying you’ve been abandoned? Can you handle those gazes? Oh, Lady Misérian.... I’m here to help you.”

Alecto had abandoned her, so now Eris had no one but him. All she had to do was bend her ego a little bit. If you get the first button wrong, you just undo it all and start over.

“But I’m not going with you.”

Why was she so stubborn? He told her he wouldn’t love her anymore.

“I’m not going with you.”

It was confusing. Jason chose his words for a long time and managed to open his mouth. This was not the time to build up pride, lord’s daughter.

Perhaps it was Jason himself who wanted to build his pride. When Jason raised his voice, Eris cut him off.

“I hate you. No matter what people say, going anywhere with you as a partner is even more annoying.”

It was cruel and cold. A sharp word followed and stabbed him in the lungs. Is this what it feels like to lose your heart? Jason clenched his fists so as to not stumble.

He couldn’t understand. The words he said were not so bad compared to Alecto’s. He also apologized, unlike Alecto.

He never knew that he would be hated for the rest of his life, for he had only shown hostility once. If only he could prove it, he wanted to prove it. It was a momentary mistake, so he tried to beg for a chance to make up for it.

Eris sighed as if she was tired, and pressed the corners of her eyes.

“I don’t know why Lord Kazar is so persistent with

me.”

“I’m the one who wants to know why Lady Misérian., refuses favors. When it’s hard.. is it that hard to say it’s hard?”

I wanted you to rely on me. I always thought, How nice it would be if a blind person like her looked at me.

But Jason was a ‘stranger’ who did his duty by killing the dragon and was no longer needed. He was lonely, Jason was just lonely.

“To be honest.. Lady Misérian was only weak against His Highness. You have always been like that. Acting as if you didn’t need anyone other than His Highness, and trying to pretend to be strong.”

Jason strode over to Eris with bloodshot eyes and grabbed both of her wrists.

Eris twisted for a moment, but that was all. Jason continued to speak as if pressured. He might cry violently if he stopped talking even for a moment.

“Now, even though you said that you want to rest a little.. why.. so.. why are you beating yourself up?”

In fact, it was what he wanted to hear.

You don’t have to push yourself anymore.

It’s okay if you stop. Surely someone will know. I’m with you.

As a young man who could not do anything despite being forced to do something unreasonable, Jason, who had to try to die to meet people’s expectations, desperately needed clichéd support, even if it was empty words.

She would have done the same. He was sure she wanted someone to know. She would have needed someone to understand and support her. He was confident now. He just needed to know her and protect her. Then both could be happy.

However, Eris rejected Jason.

She slapped him on the cheek and he stared blankly at Eris.

“What the hell do you know about me..! Don’t treat me like a weak woman you have to protect! You really don’t know? I’m not miserable at all! It’s you who wants me to be miserable! That’s how you can dig into that gap.”

He was sure she was saying bad things because she was caught. No matter how ferocious she was, she would surely cry inside.

“You know.. I’m not interested in Lord Kazar. Tdon’t hate you either. Hating is possible only when you are interested.”

That can’t be true. He and Eris were of the same kind. Somehow, however, Jason faltered and backed down as Eris approached.

When he looked down at Eris with a frightened face as if he were facing something he was afraid of, she quietly wedged.

“I’m not curious at all. How you have lived and what you think.”

Even though he was crying, Eris did not show any sympathy. Jason eventually reached out, but Eris angrily struck out the hand.

“What makes you happy and sad.... I don’t want to know, and I want to forget even if I know. I won’t cry even if you go somewhere and die tomorrow. Because you’re a ‘stranger’ to me.”

“..You don’t need me?”

“If you understand, don’t talk to me from now on. I’m tired.”

Jason could not let Eris go like this. Somehow, if he sent her now, it seemed like it would forever end like this. Hang on. Please. Lord’s daughter! Jason desperately called her, but Eris ignored him and walked firmly.

As soon as he tried to grab her wrist, a fair hand, suddenly stopped him.

A blurred face. It was the knight of Eris.

After shaking his wrist off with strength, he let go of his hand. As a result, Jason, who was shaken by the rebound, stared fiercely at Anakin.

“How dare you touch a noble’s body?... Do you want to die?”

“Not only is my master not Lord Kazar.... It’s my duty to stop whoever touches my master if she doesn’t want to.”

Anakin, who responded rudely to Jason’s threat, knelt down on one knee and looked up at Eris. Even looking down was rude. Like a believer.

When Anakin asked for Jason’s disposal, Eris sighed. Then, she laughed.

That appearance was embedded clearly. It was a smile that she had never given him.

He didn’t know she could laugh at anyone other than Alecto.

If he hadn’t threatened Eris at first, would she have smiled like that if he had recognised Eris from the beginning?

“Jason Kazar, don’t bother me and leave.”

“If you want to throw away your emotions or memories like trash, I’ll lend you a mirror. Take care of it by yourself. Don’t look for someone else.”

It was a useless assumption. Although Eris was concerned about Helena, she didn’t even give him the slightest bit of compassion.

Jason, who had been hurt by Eris and tattered, moved slowly guided by her maidservant. His mind went blank.

“If I had known this, it would have been better if I had killed the dragon and died.”

No, he would have been happier if he hadn’t killed the dragon and it burned everything.

Jason suddenly looked at his feet and swallowed a scream. His own shadow took the form of a dragon He tried to run away from the shadow, but the dragon’s shadow clung to him and chased him without failure.

My hands were shaking and I was terrified, but somehow I didn’t regret it. Think. Let’s think about it. I can’t just be out of it since I did something. It had to be solved before this bell was over.

What Medea said when Anakin and I went to her house one day came to mind.

– Witches are a species that ‘evolve’ when they feel desperate. However, the grudge must be strong enough to break through all the truths that bind you.

We talked a lot that day.

Medea talked like Scheherazade [1] in ‘One Thousand and One Nights’, then looked at me silently and said, There’s no way the bell will ring someday, but if you hear the bell, you must call out with confidence,

– Why?

– It’s a precursor to the transition. We call it the sound of the bells of transcendence. When the bell rings, you evolve into a witch. And once you become a witch, you can’t go back.

Medea looked in the air for a while and added to me,

– When you become a witch, you cannot cross the worlds and you’ll be stuck in that world. This is because if a person with powers like a witch goes to another world, the existence of that world is in danger. You don’t want to live in this world ‘forever’, do you?

– .... What should I do if I hear the bell?

– Call the other witches to stop the bell. At least three people are required. It will be possible because you will be an existence that has not yet become a ‘witch’. Witches may know a little more about their field of interest, but there is basically no difference in power That’s why when we kill another witch, we outnumber her.

Ding. The fourth bell rang already.

I was in a hurry. I called the name of the person needed the most right now. The name that I wanted to call so much.

“Anakin, I need you. Right now.”

However, the sixth bell rang and until then Anakin did not appear. Why?

He can’t have gone back. Because he can’t leave his owner behind. Why isn’t he showing up?

I went around and around in the room and bit my finger. What if Anakin got caught up in something? felt like my head was going to explode with anxiety.

Then, there was a rattling sound from far away Anakin was pulling himself up through the window had opened earlier.

Just like how I imagined when I was sick in the mansion one day. As soon as he crossed the window, he ran to me and knelt down.

[1] Major female character and the storyteller in the frame narrative of the Middle Eastern collection of tales known as the One Thousand and One Nights. Visit https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scheherazade to more information.